


Yours Truly

by LordiTheUltimate



Series: Uta No Prince Sama: Sequentia [1]
Category: Uta no Prince-sama
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Awkward Crush, Crush at First Sight, Drama, Fluff and Smut, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Inspired by Music, M/M, Male Slash, Music, Romance, Slow Burn, Song fic, Yaoi, part of a series, traces of songfic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-28
Updated: 2018-02-02
Packaged: 2018-08-18 08:01:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 44,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8155007
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LordiTheUltimate/pseuds/LordiTheUltimate
Summary: Fresh in college and low on money, Ittoki does what every college student does; gets a minimum waged job at a café, right across his apartment building. Everyday, he sees the mysterious Tokiya enter and order a cup of hot milk and he is head over heels for him. The attraction gets stronger when it turns out that the mysterious guy is his new neighbor. Things start out rocky for the two boys but they both discover their passion for music and begins to produce music together. But there is a constant distance between them, enforced by Tokiya’s numerous secrets…





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Neighbor college music AU thing about two guys in college falling hard for each other, after making music together. I can’t really explain this any further so there you go. Have it this way and enjoy. Part 1 of a larger series of UtaPi AU stories, that I'm planning.  
> Reviews and the like is appreciated. Good, bad; throw them at me.  
> No smut before the later chapters. Sorry.

He did not like coffee very much. Especially black coffee. He couldn’t stand the bitter, strong taste of it and not even milk and sugar could make him slightly tolerate it. His toes curled every time, the scent hit his nostrils. Which just happened to be every day of his modern life, taking time out of his already busy schedule. It happened that Ittoki would arrive home late, tired and smelling like coffee. And out of time to really do his homework.

However, he had grown accustomed to the smell. He could stomach it now; mostly because his job required it from him. It had grown on him in such a way that it didn’t bother him so much anymore. He wouldn’t be so grumpy when he came home.

 Thus today, his spirits were high as always while he oversaw the door in case any new customers would arrive. It was amazing how he was even paid, considering that very few people ever stepped into ROULETTE, yet his boss demanded that Ittoki kept the coffee machines going. Just in case. Ittoki could count on his hand, the number of people setting foot here on his one hand per week. That was not entirely true though as groups of giggling girls would drop by from time to time in order to get their rounds of latté. Or maybe the high schoolers, who had some coins to spare and needed a place to buy some cheap cake. Needless to say, not many people came here, especially in the warm months. And when they did, Ittoki would never see them again. Often or rather always, a new face would enter and then never show up again.

And Ittoki did not blame them as the place itself was pretty ugly and had an unattractive atmosphere. The floor was made of worn out oak, the furniture was old and had lost their original color and charm, the walls were made of concrete with nature posters plastered all over them. At least the items on the menu were good.  But, as of late, around a month ago, something amazing happened: The ROULETTE got its very first regular. Ittoki remembered it like was it yesterday…

He was anxious now, constantly fiddling with the edge of his brown t-shirt. He kept his red eyes locked on the door, hoping that the regular would show up today or at least walk by. To catch a glance at him was the highlight of Ittoki’s day. It was borderline stalkerish, but it was the highest profit, he would get while working here. And the occasional free food but that was beside the point. 

 It was odd but Ittoki relished in his presence. He didn’t feel so lonely when the regular was around. It was raining today, just like when they first met. It brought Ittoki back to memory lane.

For once, the scales were tipped in his favor and the doorbell chimed, sending Ittoki on edge. He stood in awe as the customer entered, with a laptop under his arm and a bag on his shoulders. Thanks to the rain, he was completely soaked.

 His blue eyes paid no mind to the redheaded waiter but instead focused on a lone table near the window. He would always sit there, at that exact same table, on that exact chair, which gave him a clear outlook over the counter and a small glimpse into the kitchen. Ittoki only knew this because he once tried to sit there. But he himself did not see the appeal of this exact spot. Not to mention that there were several seats near the window in the ROULETTE. Ittoki wondered how his regular would react if he arrived and saw that his seat was occupied.

 There was a mysterious air around the stranger that enticed Ittoki endlessly and his presence alone made the redhead giddy like a child on Christmas.

Not to mention that he was incredibly handsome.

The mystery guest remained silent, opening his laptop while fetching a pair of glasses from the bag. Luckily, they happened to be unaffected by the downpour. Ittoki stepped behind the kitchen to fetch some tea towels before he went back. The ROULETTE had an overabundance of towels, which the redhead never thought would be useful until a month ago.

 That was Ittoki’s calling; the redhead skipped feverishly towards with a notepad and towels in his arms. His heart pounded faster with every step.

“The usual.” The stranger said coldly with his eyes glued to his laptop screen before Ittoki even had a chance of speaking. His hands quickly moved across the keyboard typing away, despite the fact that his hair was dripping wet.

“Here.” Ittoki placed the towels on the table, making sure that the bundle didn’t touch any of his guest’s stuff.

“Just so you won’t get cold.” He found it increasingly harder to speak. He averted his eyes to the droplets falling outside. It had not been raining since the day where they first met.

“…Thanks.” The redhead’s heart skipped a beat when he heard that one word. How he wanted to stay here and feel like a hero forever.

“Th-the usual?”

“Yes.”

“Ok~!” the redhead scribbled some hasty mess on his notepad while trying to stop himself from staring at his guest with the wet, blue hair and a wet, white shirt.

Ittoki quickly made his way to the kitchen where he prepared to heat up the milk while pushing the image of a shirtless stranger out of his head. Ittoki remembered the first day where the stranger entered the ROULETTE. Again, no familiar faces had entered the café. He had received the order and his jaw had dropped to the floor as he stood and gawked at his customer. It had rained that day and the stranger had looked like a drowned rat, yet he remained unfazed. He just waltzed in, dripping all over the floor and sat down near the window as the endless downpour continued. Ittoki’s first reaction was to grab a fistful of towels and frantically throw it at his customer.

Needless to say, it was an awkward encounter. But it ignited something within Ittoki, when he saw the same person enter the day after, ordering the same. And soon, it just became a cycle. Soon, Ittoki didn’t feel complete if he didn’t saw the stranger’s face. What started out as an unexpected meeting soon evolved into a passionate crush. And since, he was the only waiter here, he could savor the stranger all by himself.

The stranger looked like the type of man, who liked his coffee black. Perhaps an expresso, the ones all the cool kids liked to drink. With his laptop, black glasses and neat dressing, he looked all around professional. A man with an icy exterior that only focused on the most important things – his career. He always had a serious expression on his face, without any sort of variation. His voice was low and cold but he was so mysterious on his own that his antisocial behavior didn’t really bother Ittoki – too much. The redhead had always wondered how a conversation would go. He could imagine that he would do most of the talking, like he did with everyone else. He could imagine that he would blabber on while the stranger would gaze upon him and just listen with dreamy, cool eyes.

The milk took around 5 minutes to heat up at a lower temperature. Anything above that would make the liquid boil. He poured the hot milk into a coffee cup and carried it to his regular.

“Thank you.” The stranger kept his eyes on the screen. And then he said no more. He would continue to be silent for the rest of his time here. Ittoki watched him from the counter; still a little feverish. Who would have thought that he would get this many feelings out of the redhead? Even when they had barely conversed aside from around five words uttered between them. Ittoki could already conclude that the man was busy and he was not a fan of small talk.

He was typing incredibly fast and Ittoki wondered what in the world, he was doing until he suddenly stopped and the redhead watched from afar. From his bag, the stranger fetched a jar of some sort with some yellowish liquid and a pair of headphones.

* * *

As soon as the clock passed 5pm, Ittoki prepared to leave. He packed his bags and heads towards the back of the cafe where his employer sat. She was smoking in the office. Again. Her ashtray was filled to the brim and could really do good with being emptied. The small office smelt heavily of Cecil’s.

“I’m going home.”

“Sure. You’ll get your payment by the end of the week.” She mumbled and looked through the stack of paper in front of her. Ittoki shrugged and quickly left the ROULETTE. But not before snatching a few curry sandwiches on his way out.

 Now, he had to go home and do his studies for tomorrow morning.

His apartment building was just across the street so he managed to be him in no time at all. But today, things were a little different. Two removals men carried several pieces of furniture inside the empty apartment next to his own. Great. His expression soured as he realized that he likely would not be able to concentrate.

It was late afternoon, evening rather; why in the world would people be moving around now?

He unlocked the door and closed it after himself before throwing off his shoes. He then found his way to the small living room, picked up that one thick book that every college student had and began to read while eating one of the snatched sandwiches.

Ittoki’s apartment was a mess really.  Sure, he’d clean when he found the time and motivation. He’d wash his clothes when the time came but it was rare. All in all, his time was cut short, especially with the first term. Not to mention that it took him around an hour in the bus to campus.

“Gotta get through this.” the redhead sighed and flipped through his book. But already 15 pages in, he was going under. However, it only hit him when he realized that he had read the same sentence five times. Ittoki grunted and placed the book next to him.

His head hurt. But the pain soothed itself when a familiar face flashed before his closed eyes. He saw the same blue eyes, the wet hair, and that cold stare. And his cheeks flared up as more images floated before his mind, more perverted in nature.

What was his name even?

Ittoki had spent a month obsessing over this guy without having a basic idea of what he should refer to him as. For the time being, and in private, he liked to use the term “muse”. Or perhaps, that did not sound right. But at least, it was better than “object of affection”.

Ittoki needed to clear his mind so he got up from the couch, ignoring the book that fell to the ground as he headed towards the corner of his tiny living room to get his tool of relaxation. The redhead carefully picked up the guitar from the floor and sat down right then and there, where he toyed with some off-key tunes.

His inspiration had been pretty lackluster as of late; he found it easy to find a new melody but mercilessly difficult to find some lyrics. Or rather, that had always been hard for him. When something finally struck him, it hit him like a bus and he would write and play. And record it all so he could enjoy the fruit of his labor.

But lately, all he could ever do was to make covers. Sure, it had made him a little more popular on the wide web but it did not feel as much as when he wrote his own songs. Attending college was not easy. One was only human after all and Ittoki could feel his humanity catching up with him as he suddenly stopped playing and felt the exhaustion wash over him.

A soft knock on the door, startled the redhead as he gently placed his most treasured possession in its proper place and quickly headed to the door. For whatever reason, he was still somewhat frazzled. All of the apartments in this complex came with a peephole on the door but Ittoki never felt like using. It seemed so paranoid to stand and gawk before even deciding to face a person, just because one was overly suspicious. That was what made conspiracy nuts.

Without a second thought, he just pulled the door open, with a drowsy smile

“Hi.” He casually waved until he got a closer look at the person before him and his heart suddenly skipped a beat too many. Ittoki blinked a couple of time before he returned to reality and his eyes grew wide as teacups and his body suddenly felt a whole lot warmer.

“I was told to introduce myself to my new neighbor.” a familiar voice deadpanned. “Tokiya Ichinose.”

“Uh, Otoya Ittoki. Nice to meet you.” The redhead continued waving. “Nice to meet you.” He said, a little too feverishly – again. He just couldn’t contain himself, could he?

“I know.”  coldly said and with that, he was gone with the wind, leaving a speechless Ittoki behind. Not that it was a bad thing as the redhead now felt an entire surge of energy. He quickly secluded himself inside his apartment and continuously pinched himself to make himself wake up from this wonderful dream. But one patch of red and sore skin later, Ittoki realized that this would be his new reality.

The cute boy from the coffee shop was his neighbor. This was too good to be true. But it was the truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A kind commenter pointed out something quite jarring that I didn't notice so it might take a bit longer with the next chapters.


	2. Chapter 2

The following days, Ittoki noticed how he began to develop some uncharacteristic habits. Aside from his frequent daydreams, he would make the greater effort to pass Tokiya’s door every day, just to ponder if he should knock. Yet it always amounted to him staring at the door for a couple of seconds and then bolt out of there, every time an inside notice warned him of any possible human activity. And even if he had the courage to knock, what would he then say?

_Hi, I have a crush on you even though I barely know anything about you safe for your name. But you’re kinda hot though so that’s a good start, right?_

Not in a million years would that work. But the idea was beyond tempting, albeit Ittoki was sure that it would result in the two of them never seeing each other again. As happy as he was over the fact that he got a more of a chance to get closer to Tokiya, he also found himself more anxious when questions regarding his course of action surfaced. How would he approach the guy now that he was not more or less required to do it without being creepy?

Tokiya never ended his routine of getting a hot cup of milk in the ROULETTE, and thus they met each other every day. But a conversation could never take hold as Tokiya would just plug his ears and shut out the world around him. And it did not rain again for some time, which soured Ittoki’s mood a bit as he wouldn’t be able to bring a load of towels anymore. 

But at least he could gaze upon the bluenette’s beauty.

Sometimes, Ittoki would lean against the counter and shift his gaze between Tokyia and the road outside. He sometimes wondered what the bluenette was thinking. What his favorite food was. 

What type of music did he like?

Sometimes, his thoughts would enter perverted territory, but that soon became a rare occurrence. It was just too personal now that they were living next to each other. The amount of awkwardness would overflow and erupt into a terrible mess.

Ittoki awoke one morning, a week after Tokiya had moved in. True to autumn September, the wind was already making one heck of a ruckus outside. The wind used the trees to whip against his window as low wheezes came slipping through the cracks. The sky was clad in a boring color of gray and Ittoki only felt more tired by looking at it. He had slept well that night but the unexpected weather had forced him out of his rest. Not to mention that the temperature had dropped considerably, so Ittoki was practically shivering when he forced himself out of bed.

The clock was 5am.

Way too early but Ittoki knew that he wouldn’t be able to sleep anymore with all of that notice outside, so he staggered his way out of bed and prepared himself for the day. At least, he could do the last pages of homework. As the redhead sat down on his bed, a subtle sound emerged from the flat next door. The walls here was paper thin as expected by a complex with cheap apartments, so that was quite common. At least it was better than the previous inhabitants, a couple, who enjoyed their “frisky business” a little too often and too loudly.

The sound inveigled him, though, prompting him to creep closer like an alluring invitation. It was… the sound of music. A familiar song, which Ittoki had heard many times throughout his life in different versions even. It was a favorite of his mother’s as she would often hum it when she was deep in thought.

_Amazing Grace._

It sounded like it was played through speakers. Ittoki never gave the song much thought until now where it absolutely gripped him. And it was odd that he could hear it so clearly through the storm outside. Ittoki assumed that the device stood against to the wall, closest to himself.

A static sound screeched through the speakers, obscuring the end of the song into an unfamiliar, awful sound courtesy of the storm. The horrible din soon faded away as the radio host presented the next song.

“Good morning peeps! The clock is 5:30 and I bet all of you are tired on this Thursday morning!” she spoke in a shrill, overly excited voice. Her enthusiasm, this early, was absolutely incomprehensible to understand.

“Why don’t we lighten things up so y’all will get in the mood? Have it with HAYATO-“

The radio was promptly turned off, plunging the two apartments into a symphony of bad weather. Still, Ittoki felt everything was eerily silent afterward. He sat up, with an odd feeling of loneliness inside of him. HAYATO was a great singer, not someone Ittoki considered himself to be a fan of but overall an enjoyable entertainer.

But Ittoki was not surprised that Tokiya didn’t care for such a genre. He seemed more like the type who liked intelligent music.

* * *

It rained once more when Ittoki left the bus stop. Several students, including himself, hurried and ran inside the University of Saotome. Luckily the distance was fairly short and even more so when one was running. Soon, the majority of those aboard the bus stood and watched the rain fall from the inside. There was still around two hours until Ittoki had to attend class so he decided to spend his time in one of the school’s many music rooms, too many even. Ittoki couldn’t use the rooms for academic purposes since his average mark was too low for Musicology. Instead, he had to settle for something like Comparative Literature studies. At least, it taught him one thing; the power of the word, if that made any sense.

“Shitty weather is shitty.” Syo huffed and puffed, wiping raindrops off his fedora. He carefully adjusted its position, once it reached the top of his head.

“Lucky for us, we get to stay inside. That’s a plus, right?” Ittoki laughed tiredly and rubbed his eyes. He yawned as he followed Syo through the hallway.

“Nothing can really bring your optimism down. Whatever you’re smoking, gimme some of that.” Syo poked the redhead as they took a sharp turn to the right. “Well, my classes are starting so I gotta run.” The blonde opened the door to a classroom where a lot of students had already gathered, though that did not mean that there was any less crowded in the hallway. This early in the morning, there were a lot of students in the hallways. Even if they were wide as a lane, it was still difficult to walk at a reasonable pace because so many people were often heading for the same place. Not to mention those up front, who failed at getting a move on.

Ittoki, for one, was heading towards the music room, which unfortunately was located above the cafeteria, a place where 75% of campus flocked to. A staircase connected the library, the ground floor and of course, the music rooms. Outside, the stream of downpour continued, dripping against the many roof windows. The sound got slightly louder as the redhead ascended the staircase.

The heaters were not turned on yet, causing the school to become colder than an ice castle. Luckily, the same could not be said for the music room as Ittoki just remembered that he forgot to turn off the heater from yesterday, causing a heat wave to blow him in his face as he opened the door, using his student ID card as the key.

He shut the door behind him, feeling a bit drowsy from the heat. But he made way for the many instruments, most likely the guitars. Many people had been using them throughout the terms for various projects and different tones, they were quite worn down and had nowhere as close to one refined key as his own treasure at home.

But at least, they could play and that was the most important thing for Ittoki.

He tried the same keys as yesterday, tying the ends together to make a song. But he found himself playing something oddly familiar.

Amazing Grace yet again. And he played the song, producing the song flawlessly. It was like his hand just moved on its own, letting the guitar work harmoniously with his hand. It felt like a surge of energy revived his drowsy self as the bluegrass hit the strings over and over again.

“I gotta record this.”

Fetching, his cellphone from his pocket, he looked for a suitable place where he could record himself. Sure, it was another cover but it sounded wonderful regardless. Ittoki was ecstatic and giddy, prancing around feverishly before his muse would leave him once more. To capture this moment was an absolute must.

“Will you play again?”

A familiar voice asked, startling the redhead and he dropped his phone on the floor. His heart completely stopped for a moment and he froze in place as he stared at Tokiya, whose expression was nothing ever seen before. It was a complete contrast to his usual cold and harsh exterior. It was soft and even gentle perhaps. Ittoki blushed and looked down at his feet. His heart beat faster with every passing second. It was certainly true. A twist of fate had him being pursued for once.

And yet again, Tokiya hair was dripping wet from the rain. Amazing that he had yet to catch a cold. He ran a hand through his hair, droplets falling to the floor as he did so. His stylish hairstyle was completely ruined now but he looked more elegant with his hair swept back. “Elegant” was too weak of a term, “absolutely stunning” was the proper way to put it.

“Did I scare you?” He raised an eyebrow, wiping his hand on his black trousers. His voice was still on that callous level.

“No-no, it’s fine. I, uh, I just didn’t expect an audience.” The redhead quickly kneeled and scrambled for his phone. It was a pathetically clumsy attempt but it prevented his jaw from dropping to the floor. He finally grabbed his phone and his heart sank a bit when he got a good look at it.

“Did it break?” Tokyia took a few steps, shortening the distance between the two of them. His walk cycle was confident and steady, intimidating for some. But Ittoki got no feelings of danger. He just sat

The screen was cracked and now resembled a jagged maze. But the image was still viewable and the device was responsive enough. Ittoki let out a relieved breath. No way in hell, could he afford a new phone, not when he could barely afford clothes on a monthly basis.

“The screen cracked. But everything works.” He smiled out of instinct, still, a bit flushed before standing up. “Nothing to worry about.”

“Good…” The bluenette man paused before speaking again, this time more humbly.  “Now, will you play again?” he sat down near the only piano in the room.

“Sure!” Ittoki grabbed the guitar and played once more. Outside the weather had yet to get any better but for once, the howling ruckus was completely muted by the soundproof walls on this floor. So now it was only Ittoki, Tokyia and Amazing Grace. For a while, it felt like the rest of the world did not exist. Occasionally, Ittoki would glance at Tokiya, just to see his response.

The bluenette man sat motionless, staring at the playing redhead. Had it not been for his occasional blinking, he could just as well had been a wax doll. A gorgeous wax doll.

When he finally stopped playing, Ittoki felt exhausted. But full of life as well. In a sense, he felt full and happy with himself. It felt like he had accomplished something great. He put the guitar down and wondered if Tokiya would agree with him.

“It was nice. Thank you.” Tokiya nodded, stroking the keys of the piano.

“Eh? No, thanks for listening.”

A round of silence entered the small room as the conversation died down, only for Ittoki to try and bring it back to life.

“What a weather, huh?” He looked out the window, feeling Tokiya’s gaze upon him. Truth be told, it made him quiver.

“True.”

Silence, once more as the redhead thought of what to say. Then it suddenly hit him; what was that stuff that Tokiya put in his milk anyways? Cautious, he turned to the bluenette man, his face still a red mess.

“Just curious.” He smiled anxiously. “You order hot milk. And I always see you put some stuff in it. Not that I mind, not at all!”

“It’s-“

“I mean, I’m just curious since I always thought that you, uh, you liked coffee. I-you just looked like black coffee-“

“Manuka honey. It soothes the throat.” The bluenette cut him off, facing the piano. He looked elegant and refined behind that instrument.

“Eh?”

Tokiya failed to respond. Instead, he briefly pressed a couple of keys on the piano, letting his fingers work themselves into producing a pleasant melody.

“Oh, so that explains why you’re never ill.”Ittoki rubbed the back of his head. An off-key tone suddenly cut through the atmosphere. The redhead froze in place, feeling the sweat beginning to build up on his forehead. Tokiya stared at him in confusion, his expression silently telling Ittoki that he had messed up pretty badly. But the increasingly awkward ambiance was then dissolved by a soft chuckle, courtesy of Tokiya.

“No, not at all. It’s just good for my general health.” He started playing again, albeit on a controlled volume so a proper conversation could take place. It made Ittoki most happy, and a bit bewildered as he was used to the bluenette shutting the world out. The redhead felt like he was venturing towards deep waters; one mistake and he would be drowning.

“Oh, but how come you never be ill? I mean, you always come around and it’s raining and you’re all wet.” He attempted to smile once again, feeling his nerve system calming down a bit until Tokiya looked straight at him.

“You’re always there to throw those cigarette clothes at me.” He said with a deadly serious tone.

“Holy shit, sorry! It’s my boss, who’s too lazy to go outside and smoke!”

“It doesn’t mean that I dislike. Though I wish, you’d be a little more careful with where you throw them.”

It was odd. Ittoki felt an entire mosaic of emotions; anxiety, embarrassment, excitement. But most noticeably; relaxation. It made little sense to himself but it was what he felt the most. Over the course of one and a half month, Ittoki had all kinds of conceptions of what Tokiya would be like. Mysterious, serious and cold to those who did not deserve his attention. But here he was, acting like an all-around ordinary person. Honest but ordinary.

Ittoki was nowhere disappointed; in fact, he was pleasantly surprised. He sighed and leaned against a nearby table. He heard Tokiya’s melody slowing down before stopping completely.

“You’re quite talented. Could it be that you just happen to be the one, whose covers are so popular lately?”

The question caught Ittoki completely off guard, for the reason that it was true but more importantly that Tokiya knew about it. The redhead blinked for a couple of seconds before those words uttered really sank in and in that very moment, his cheeks deepened into a hot red.

“Y-yes. Uhm, how did you know? I mean, I’m glad that you know.”

“The styles were much similar. I heard you playing yesterday as well.” Tokiya rose from the piano, still keeping his eyes locked at Ittoki. It took the redhead a couple of moments before he realized that he was getting complimented and thus, he could not be any happier.

“Oh, ok! Well, I have a dream. Two actually but the other one is more like a Plan B.” He felt giddy, biting his lip. “My plan B is becoming a famous athlete.” 

“Why the guitar then?” Tokiya raised an eyebrow.

“Eehehe~, my second plan is to become a musician. Music is my great passion.” It filled a large part of his life, and it consumed him, even more, when his muse would return. Ittoki felt almost proud while speaking.

“You shouldn’t.” a could shift in tone suddenly cut the redhead off.

“Eh? What do you mean?”

“Don’t ever get involved with the music industry.” The bluenette man’s expression was more serious than ever and his voice held a certain level of bitterness, something that made Ittoki uncomfortable and confused. His smile dropped considerable as he asked the logical question.

“Why not?”

Tokiya frowned. “I know someone who was screwed over mercilessly. It made him lose his heart for music. In fact, I can see traits of him in you.”

“Oh-oh. Ok. I’m sorry.”

“That’s why I’m warning you. Take my words to heart if you know what’s good for you.” Tokiya’s behavior had come out of nowhere and it ruined the pleasant mood that once was. He prepared to leave, grabbing his bag with such a tight grip, his knuckles were white. Yet he still spoke in that controlled tone.

“But-“ before Ittoki could respond properly, Tokiya had left the room, leaving the redhead baffled and borderline heartbroken. What was this huge uneasy feeling that gripped him right now? He felt so everlastingly guilty no matter how hard he tried, he failed to pinpoint the exact reason behind this feeling. Even so, he felt defeated. So crushingly defeated and numb.  


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Er, we’re entering song fic-ish territory.   
> Now that we got that out of the way, I'd like to say thank you for all of the reviews and kudos!

The rest of the week, Ittoki was a saddened mess. His heart grew heavy every time, he went for work and even so, he was relieved. Mostly because Tokiya suddenly stopped coming to the ROULETTE altogether, making the redhead so lonely at work. He still heard his neighbor’s radio at morning but he never saw as much of a shadow of Tokiya.

Still, a mere two days after the routine was broken, Ittoki began bringing the hot milk directly to Tokiya’s door as a means of something, he could not explain. Ittoki had no explanation as to why he did so or rather no logical one. He felt like he had lost some purpose since Tokiya no longer came to visit the measly coffee shop. It became a weird habit, he excised on a daily basis. But it gave him some level of painful satisfaction.

The week after, Ittoki was looking at the traffic stats of his recent covers. He never got to record Amazing Grace and ever since that episode in the music room, he did not feel like playing guitar. His covers were the most popular, with massive shares and likes whereas, his original work only got half as much attention. Yet one song more popular than the others, Brand New Melody. It wasn’t really an imaginative title but it meant a lot for Ittoki as it was the first song, he ever played and produced. He remembered his enthusiastic self writing the lyrics and sing it loudly while jamming away on his guitar.

Curious, he looked through the notifications, noticing the same “OMG” and “So good” among several misspelled exclamations of joy. Ittoki smiled tiredly as he saw the reaction of his fans. Suddenly, he thought of Tokiya’s reaction to his future plans and his heart sank again.

A new notification brought him out of the flashback. It was someone, who had just shared the video. Curious, Ittoki clicked on the blog name and read their response.

_A very beautiful song. It fills me with confidence and the feeling that I can do everything. The melody is upbeat and positive and I can’t help but feel better about myself every time I hear it. There is a lot in life that triggers me, even mundane things and I’ve always felt bad for being so mentally weak. I felt like I was a broken doll, that couldn’t take anything but your song gives me strength. Your voice is sweet too; I love listening to it. You are simply amazing._

_Thank you for showing me the light._

Ittoki read the message once more. And again. Even if he had no idea of who wrote this, he could feel the genuine sincerity oozing from every word. It touched something within him and made him smile brighter than before. This was someone, who was personally moved by what used to be and somewhat still was a hobby. It had given them hope and strength, It accomplished exactly what Ittoki thought Brand New Melody would do.

He bookmarked the message and promised himself to leave a personal reply. Afterward, he made preparations for his new habit; boiling the milk and heading over to Tokiya.

Without wearing his shoes, Ittoki headed straight to his neighbor’s door, knocking on it softly. He did not bother with footwear, not when he just had to leave a cup of hot milk outside a door.

His hand shook but he stood with his head held high. He feared a confrontation, he did so every time. But this time, he believed that he was prepared for what to come. He had no expectations to Tokiya opening the door as he had been promptly ignored the previous evenings.

“You don’t come around anymore.” The redhead paused, thinking of what to say next. “But I brought you your milk again. I gave it a little extra so it wouldn’t get cold before you drink it.”

He put the thermos cup on the doormat, clearing his throat before he spoke again. He thought of the blog, and what it had written about Brand New Melody.

“Sorry if I triggered you.”  He stood up. He wanted to say more, yet he got the feeling that it would only make matters worse. The past days where he had arrived with the milk, he had considered of speaking his mind but he always had the nagging feeling that he knew wouldn’t leave him until he spoke up.

“I know, you tried to warn me for my own sake. And I’m grateful for that.” Ittoki took a deep breath. “But I won’t stop until I reach my dream. I won’t lose my heart or my passion!”

And he started singing. His voice was a bit rusty and quite low as he had not been practicing at all but he sang. His voice was poured out from the deepest pit of his heart. Luckily, he and Tokiya was the only two people living on this floor, which just happened to be the top floor and the hallway was half-open to the outside so his singing wouldn’t be bouncing and echoing to garner people’s attention.

_With a full-throttle smile, let’s aim at tomorrow_

_Make a 1000% spirited peace sign_

_I’ll say it this time, that two-word phrase_

_My heart just can’t help but fly_

Ittoki snapped his mouth shut, his heart pounding hard when he suddenly thought about the last line of the chorus. But he sang it regardless of its blatant truth.

_I’m captivated by you_

The redhead held his breath as sounds of locks and keys being turned emerged from the door. Tokiya’s wide-eyed faced showed itself when the wooden barrier unlocked. He was wearing his reading glasses.

“Why in the world are you giving me a serenade outside my door?”

“Because I love music more than anything. There’s no way, I’ll be persuaded from it! Also, I… wanted to say sorry.”

Tokyia paused, glancing at something behind the redhead before she talked again. 

“There is no need. The fault is on me. I was surprised at my own unrecognizable behavior and for that, I apologize.” Tokiya had an amazing ability to appear ungodly serious, even when he tried to be humble.

“No hard feelings?” Ittoki meekly asked.

“Of course not.”

And then the two of them stood in silence. It was cold for Ittoki’s feet but he ignored the discomfort and instead internally celebrated himself for his accomplishments. That was until an idea popped into his head. He tried to look straight at Tokiya but had to lower his gaze to the blue-haired man’s nose.

“…I can sing you the rest of the song if you want.” Ittoki said with a smile, a proposal that surprised Tokiya. The blue-haired man withheld an answer. He shrugged his shoulders and moved aside for Ittoki to enter his apartment.

“Remove your socks before you come inside. Shoes exist for a reason.”

“That’s kinda brutal, ehehe…” Ittoki rubbed the back of his head as he went inside. “I didn’t expect you to open the door, let alone invite me inside.”

Tokiya closed the door, shutting the September cold out “I didn’t expect you giving me a serenade outside my door.”

“Touché.” Ittoki removed his socks, shrugging as his bare feet hit the entrance doormat which stung his skin. He stuffed the cold socks in his pocket and ventured further inside.     

\------------------------------------------------

Tokiya’s apartment was quite the opposite of the redhead’s. Everywhere was immaculate. The wooden floor looked to be glowing with the lights’ reflection, and although the decoration was limited, it was neatly placed, creating a refined ambiance. Even though all apartments of this complex mirrored themselves to their neighbors, it still felt like  Tokiya’s apartment was much bigger than Ittoki’s, if not only because Tokiya seemed to be cleaning on a regular basis. Ittoki sat down in the kitchen, staring at everything with awe. From where he sat, he suddenly saw a radio standing on a shelf in the living room, located between two vases.  He turned to Tokiya, who was preparing the milk with the honey.

“Why did you stop in the middle of the chorus? You ruined the flow.”

“I, uh, well…” Ittoki blushed heavily. “I’m not good with lyrics.” He finally lied. But it was for the best. He couldn’t just blatantly state something so true, like the fact that he, indeed, captivated by Tokiya.

“I see. Your lyrics are fine, though they need some polishing.” Tokiya sat down in front of him, sipping his hot milk. It left Ittoki curious and his eyes followed the thermos cup.

“Do you make music yourself?”

“I study musicology.”

“Oh really? That must be cool!”

“It suffices.” Tokiya chugged down the last milk before he headed towards the sink and cleaned it with soap and everything. Heading towards Ittoki, he gave the redhead the cup and disappeared into the living room. Ittoki sat with the cup in his hand, its heat still radiating from the warm water. He rose from the seat and followed the trail of the blue-haired man.

In the living room, Tokiya stood in the middle of the floor with a guitar in his hand. He wiped some dust off it before placing it carefully against the black leather couch.

“Tokiya, I didn’t know that you could play the guitar.”

“I play all kinds of instruments… but I prefer my voice.”

Ittoki’s eyes gleamed like a Christmas tree. The voice as an instrument was a new enlightenment for the redhead. With shaky hands, he grabbed the guitar and played a few tunes. It was a bit rustic and the strings were slightly out of tune. If the voice could be regarded as an instrument, it could be mastered. Ittoki made a mental note, while he adjusted the strings of the guitar and Tokiya disappeared into his bedroom, only to emerge with a pen and paper. His expression was gravely serious but his movements were gentle and graceful.

“You wrote that song yourself. It suits you.” Between his fingers, Tokiya joggled the pen around. He looked like he wanted to say more but had to think of what exactly to say.

“Your music brings joy to the hearts of many. Including yourself.”

Ittoki rubbed the back of the guitar, flattered but thoughtful. He dreamt of debuting one day and bring his music to the world. It was his passion in life; the dream that kept him going. And now, with Tokiya saying those things to him, he felt more encouraged than ever. Tokiya really believed in him.

“When you take it to the next level, be cautious.”

“Yes sir!” And Ittoki sang with his heart’s content, pouring out every lyric with the utmost determination and sincerity. He let his voice guide the melody emerging from the guitar.    

_Carried on this melody created by two, it seems like the future is overlapping with today._

_Firmly without changing, like this phrase, I don’t want let this go._

He made a quick glance at Tokiya, who seemed busy with writing every lyric down. Suddenly, he got up from his seat and seat next to Ittoki, frowning in thought. They were practically rubbing shoulders, and it unleashed a tornado of butterflies in Ittoki’s stomach. He felt his cheek burning and his heart worked at Mach speed as his singing came to an abrupt stop.

“What’s wrong?”

Ittoki couldn’t explain it. He just sat there, blushing and shy like a timid schoolgirl. “Nothing, I-I just…” It may had been him but the temperature seemed to have risen a bit.

“What? Are you ill? Your face is red.” Tokiya said, nonchalantly even though his face expressed the complete opposite. Without a hint of warning, his hand moved to Ittoki’s forehead. The redhead’s heart beat even faster as he turned away from Tokiya.

“No, I’m fine.” Ittoki tried to laugh as he quickly attempted to regain his posture and continue the song. From the corner of his eye, he saw Tokiya writing something down on the other side of the paper.

_We two who’ve stumbled and fallen will continue on towards tomorrow._

Suddenly, the piece of paper was shoved into Ittoki’s face. Tokiya pointed the pen at something written there.

“Try to say this out loud.” He commanded sternly, poking the paper in the process. His handwriting was incredibly refined and quite honestly hard for Ittoki to read but the redhead tried regardless.

“My heart is burning…?” Ittoki felt like Tokiya had seen right through him when that was written. He raised an eyebrow as Tokiya took back the paper. And chuckled. Just a low gruelingly sound, but it was enough for Ittoki to pick it up. And he decided to laugh along. He was nowhere sure about what was funny, perhaps it had been his completely blank face when he read that line.

“I.. didn’t know, it was possible for you to laugh.” Ittoki said out of the blue, only to retract that by avoiding Tokiya’s questioning gaze. 

“No, that came out wrong. What I mean is…” he tried to correct himself, taking a deep breath. 

“When I see you at the ROULETTE, you're always so serious. And good-professional looking, so I wondered why you even set foot in that place at all. It doesn’t suit you at all and when I look at how you live, it suits you even less” His fingers began to hurt from lack of bluegrass so he put the guitar down. A small patch of dust had formed itself on his lap and Ittoki saw the blue eyes glaring at the dirty particles before they moved to the paper and something was written on it.

Tokiya continued to write some more “I like it there. It’s a cozy and mundane place that gives me some peace. Unlike Starbucks, not to mention that it’s cheaper.”

“You’re right about that.” Ittoki sat back, relaxing against the soft density of the couch. For something made out of thick black leather, it sure was comfortable. Way more than Ittoki’s own worn out sofa bed, he got for practically no money from a nearby thrift shop. He already had a bed but he needed something resembling a living room, that could be presented, should guests arrive.

Aside from his mother, guests never came by.

“Are you the only employee there? I don’t think, I’ve seen anyone else but you.” Tokiya removed his glasses, rubbing his eyes.  He imitated Ittoki’s position of relaxing, bringing the two of them physically closer.

“Yeah, as you can see, it’s not a lot of work. But It brings food to the table so I don’t really complain.”

“That’s good. Nobody really heats the milk like you do. No café really offers hot milk for that matter.”

“Ehehehe~! That’s the ROULETTE for you.”

The two boys sat and seethed in the pleasant mood present. Neither of them spoke for some time, letting the atmosphere do the talking. Or that was perhaps what Ittoki wanted. He turned his head to Tokiya, wondering what he was thinking. He seemed like the type of person, who was throughout in everything he did but with such efficiency that it was hard to notice at first. Or maybe, Ittoki just thought in fogs; processes and theories that made no sense. Yet, he felt like he knew Tokiya well enough to think like that. The two of them had only encountered each other two times, and even then both encounters felt so insightful.

Or maybe that was complete dissonance? Maybe Ittoki’s crush had bloomed prematurely and it had driven him to sing outside another person’s door after bringing them hot milk every day for a week. It wasn’t even love, he was old enough to know that; it was just a crush, yet it made the redhead feel so alive as he couldn’t remember the last time, he had felt so strongly towards someone.

“Tokiya?” Ittoki yawned.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bolded text are text messages. Just thought you'd like to know

Today, the sun decided to show its face, casting its light on the shiny floor, illuminating the entire room. Ittoki awoke, slowly opening his sleep-riddled eyes. He yawned and sat up with a slow pace. He felt like he had slept in a bed of down but it was just Tokiya’s leather sofa, as evident by the fabric sticking to his skin.

He looked around and noticed a white shirt pulled over him. Grabbing the clothing, the redhead proceeded to study it, quickly concluded that it was not his own. Not to mention the scent; the intoxicating and familiar scent. He remembered it from yesterday. It was the scent of Tokiya, or rather his deodorant.

Without a second thought, Ittoki buried his face into the shirt, absorbing every fragrance possible. His perverted mind was slowly reviving itself, as he made sure to memorize that specific scent.

“Good morning.” Tokiya deadpanned, causing the redhead to shriek and throw the shirt away from him like the plague.

“Oh my God, you gave me a damn heart attack!”

Tokiya ignored the ruckus, walking across the floor to pick up his shirt. Coincidently, it happened to land on the spot of sunlight, emitted from the kitchen window. He wasn’t nearly as muscular as he was lean. Lean and well-built, nothing out of proportion. Even when wearing nothing but ugly sweatpants, he was absolutely gorgeous.

Simply put, he reminded Ittoki of a Greek God. 

 “You fell asleep all of a sudden, right after saying my name. I just covered you up and let you be.” He said while disappearing into his bedroom with the shirt. Ittoki caught a glimpse of the sacred bedchamber, that was as immaculate as the rest of the apartment. The bed was neatly made and curtains were pulled away from the window. Still, Tokiya went over to adjust them until they were positioned perfectly.

“I didn’t expect you to wake up anytime soon. So I went over to your place and locked the doors.” The bluenette made sure that everything was at its proper place before he returned and close the door behind him. That was until he noticed the guitar.

“Ah, thanks. But where did you get my keys?” Ittoki grabbed the guitar as gave it to Tokiya, who made way for the bedroom again while answering.

“On the coat hanger.”

“Oh? Uh, thanks…again.”

A benevolent act, that made Ittoki smile with giddiness as he rose from the couch. He was a bit surprised that Tokiya would even go that far. But perhaps that was what neighbors did towards each other. The redhead followed the bluenette to the kitchen.

“…you should clean more often.”

“I’d like to when I get the time and energy.” Ittoki watched the bluenette fiddling with something in the fridge, which just happened to be the home of many vegetables and protein shakes. A plate was suddenly placed on the table with tin foil covering the plate.

“What are those?” The redhead asked curiously as Tokiya removed the tin foil, revealing oddly shaped pancakes.

“Low-calorie pancakes. With blueberries.”

Curious, Ittoki’s eyes followed another although empty plate. He was a little unsure if he should just dig in as he just now realized how terribly hungry he was. For the sake of manners, he ignored his growling stomach and observed Tokiya’s routine. His movements were precise and quick, making sure so use only the necessary objects while everything else lay in its place.

From a specific spot on the counter, he grabbed a bottle of syrup and poured it over the pancakes.

“Here you go. Don’t wait for me.”

“It looks amazing! Thanks!” Ittoki could not be happier and he proceeded to stab the pancake and gorge himself. Soon, Tokiya joined the morning table, putting a bowl of yogurt with fruit and cereal and two glasses. And lastly, homemade juice.

“You made all this yourself?” Ittoki chewed his pancake, starring at Tokiya with big eyes. 

“Over an extended period of time. I’m a busy man.”

“…Are you busy today too?”

“Yes.”

Upon hearing this, Ittoki smiled faintly. His disappointment could not be described and yet, he did suspect this. He washed it all down with half a glass of juice. It had a sour aftertaste, perhaps because of the high amount of pulp from the fruit.

“Mmm, it’s really good!” the redhead ate the last pancake, shaking off any negative feeling he had. His eyes quickly shifted from his breakfast plate to the bluenette before him. Tokiya himself was surprised to hear the compliment, blinking for a couple of moments with a blank look on his face before he finally came up with a response.

“Thank you.” He smiled faintly.

The two boys sat and ate in silence as the Saturday morning passed by. Briefly, Ittoki thought of the two of them as a married couple. A newlywed couple sitting and eating breakfast together-

Ittoki almost choked on his juice, coughing and wheezing as a startled Tokiya quickly went over to tap his back. After the commotion died down, he offered the redhead some water.

“Thanks, Ichi. You’re a life saver!”

“What did you call me?” Tokiya froze in place, his eyes wide with an alien expression. Had his grip been looser, he could surely have dropped the glass and Ittoki grew unnerved.

“Ichi? Short for Ichinose?”

“Why, though?”

“Eh? I-I just thought…really, I don’t really know.” Ittoki rubbed the back of his head, suddenly thinking of “Ichiban”.

Tokiya resumed his routine, cleaning the glass and then Ittoki’s plate. He breathed rather deeply than he had done up until now and his movements were a little slower than earlier.

“I don’t mind really. Just don’t expect me to give anything to you.”

A random idea suddenly popped up in the redhead’s mind and he eagerly leaned forward, oblivious to the fact that there was a blueberry stain on his cheek.

“You can call me Ikki!”

“Not before you wipe your mouth.”

The redhead blushed as he reached for a napkin. “Oh shit.” He quickly wiped the stain away before searching for Tokiya’s reaction. Which was the same, pleasant low chuckle.

“Want some milk? I mean, you did make me breakfast and let me crash at your place.” The redhead rose from his seat, chugging down the rest of his juice and bringing the glass with him.

“All right.” Tokiya fetched a pot from a cabinet and handed it to Ittoki before he headed to the fridge and grabbed the milk. And pouring it into the pot. Practically, he was doing all of the preparations for the redhead. But Ittoki managed to get a hold of the burner and soon heated the milk. From the corner of his eye, he saw Tokiya getting his jar of Manuka honey.

Out of the blue, a spoon suddenly floated before Ittoki’s eyes, dangerously close to his nose. The sweet scent of the honey entices him.

“Open your mouth.” The bluenette commanded, standing right next to Ittoki, who barely opened his mouth to say something before the spoon was pushed into his mouth. The taste was sweet as the scent yet it held an ounce of bitterness. It was most delicious and perhaps the strongest honey, Ittoki had ever tasted. It was like a new epiphany that made his mouth water; he turned to Tokiya, wide-eyed and hungry for more.

“It’s the best thing ever!”

“Remember the taste. And get a jar of your own. It will soothe your throat.” Tokiya retrieved a clean spoon from a cabin and placed it next to a cup. He sternly watched the hot milk in the pot and his cool eyes followed the liquid being poured down in his cup.

“There you go.” Ittoki smiled, observing Tokiya’s routine of preparing his milk. But the bluenette suddenly turned around and disappeared into the living room, rather hastily. When he returned to a speechless redhead, he held a piece of paper in his hand.

“I suggest that we take turns to write a lyric when we split after a meeting. Since I started yesterday, I believe that it’s your turn now.” He handed Ittoki the paper, with a serious face. Like the employer with sky-high expectations to his workers. And Ittoki, being the impressionable youth, took the paper. He looked at the bluenette and nodded with the utmost obedience.

“You can count on me.”

* * *

Ittoki should be studying but he just couldn’t find the motivation. Instead, he lay on his belly and read the sheet of paper, that Tokiya gave him. There was not much to read except for that one line, Tokiya had written. Then again, it was not much work that they had done before the conversation trailed off to the ROULETTE.

“My heart is burning.” Indeed, it had, though it wondered Ittoki why that line was even written. One had to start off somewhere but why that specific line? What did Tokiya think when he wrote it? How should Ittoki match his level of complexity?

“My heart is burning” he repeated again until something else rolled over his tongue “…and singing. Why is it?”

It fitted nicely albeit a blatant choice of words but it fitted nicely. Again and again, Ittoki repeated the completed line while desperately thinking of a melody. What instruments should be used? How would the tempo be? Should there be any special effects like autotune? The music room did have a studio for recording, despite the fact that almost no one used it.

_My heart is burning… and singing. Why is it?_

Giddy, Ittoki said the line for himself before he put the paper away. Eventually, they would have to find a title and an actual theme for the song as well but for now, they needed to write some lyrics that followed a connecting thread.

But for now, proud of himself, he returned to studying. Ittoki put the paper down and fetched the books. The Humanistic Theory of Scientific Method was an incredibly boring read and it didn’t help that their teacher, as sweet as he was, had a habit of giving his students loads of homework to do. Ringo was truly a brutal man. As Ittoki began to read, his mind began to wander back to Tokiya.

 His little crush had grown a whole lot stronger.

Unable to concentrate fully, he put the book away and went outside to clear his mind. The sun had now decided to hide itself behind a layer of lightly colored clouds. It had been so long since he had walked in the neighborhood. There was less than anything interesting here but at times, the emptiness and solitude of the city’s outskirts calmed the nerves and cleared one’s mind.

Ittoki reminded himself to take Tokiya out for a walk one day. Nearing the local park, he sat down on a bench and looked at his phone.

It was closing in on noon and the redhead wondered what he should spend the rest of the day on.

A sudden buzz suddenly startled him and he turned on the phone to see a text message from one of his classmates and more accurately, one of his study partners.

**_Hi! How’s it going? XD_ **

It was odd for Tomochika to text him at this type of day. When she could, she would stay in her bed until 2 pm, though it was not much of a surprise since she had to start a radio show at 5am and then drain herself for energy for the sake of work.

 ** _Hey! Aren’t you early up?_** The cracked screen made it more or less difficult to correct what he was typing but he remained sure that what he wrote wasn’t complete gibberish.

After a minute or so, another text entered his inbox and he checked it immediately.

**_Haha, very funny, XC!!!! Anyways, I need your help. I got a friend coming over and I don’t have so much time this weekend so I thinking about you could show her around and stuff. You know, make her feel welcomed._ **

**_You want me to fake date her?_** Ittoki was not impressed, shrugging a little as he feared for the worst.

**_No way. She’s way too timid for that. Not to mention oblivious. She couldn’t take a hint even if someone blatantly sent her a Valentine’s card. Nah, I want you to show her around town, show her all the good places and whatnot. When you have the time, of course._ **

Ittoki was relieved, typing once more. Tokiya was efficient on handwriting whereas Ittoki praised himself in texting and it suddenly hit him that he had yet to receive Tokiya’s number. But did not occupy his train of thoughts as he wondered why Tomochika had come to him and not someone else. He never considered himself to the charismatic type; rather he was a jock, a sports nerd, a complete dork. A new text was sent from his study partner,

**_She composes music as well. I’m sure the two of you will be good friends. Just friends and nothing more. Ok?_ **

He withheld an answer for a couple of seconds, in order not to scream of joy. Maybe she could help with the new song. Ittoki was ecstatic typing a “YES” complete with a happy smiley and before long, Tomochika had replied.

**_Great! See you in class!!!_ **


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm having too much fun with this story XD

Nobody sat on their seats, and there were no signs of the teacher, causing a lively buzz in the classroom. The was a huge age gap in his class. He was one of the youngest at 18 where there were those who had turned 50. And the teachers were proximally around 30. The different courses were a cesspool of ages, traditions and study habits, vastly different from each other.

“Hey. Ittoki!” Tomochika waved when Ittoki eagerly entered the classroom. She was the only other person who was remotely close to him in terms of age.

His spirits were high today. She patted the seat next to her, prompting the redhead to sit next to her on the second row of seats. They were the only two people there as everyone else retracted to the rear rows of seats. Tomochika’s heavy perfume lingered in the small space, they shared. It reminded Ittoki of the many fields of strawberries, whose scent would linger in the hot summer air around the orphanage. 

“How’s it going?” She smiled brightly, albeit her lips slowly dropped when he saw his phone and she shook her head. “You doofus.” She snorted and pointed at the phone.

“I dropped it.” He shrugged when he sat down, putting the device away in his pocket.

“Remember that we got a study group meeting tomorrow.” Tomochika fetched her books from the bag placed at the seat next to her.

“Ok.” Ittoki answered distantly.

“By the way.” Tomochika cleared her throat. “My friend will be coming over today. And she’s starting on Musicology.”

“Nice.” Ittoki just noticed that he had forgotten his jacket in the music room. But it did little to his high spirit.

“Sure, it is.” Tomochika looked straight at Ittoki. “Got any plans today?” she twisted a red lock between her fingers, smiling with calculated innocence. Ittoki knew the cunning look on her face too well.

“I got work today.”

“Oh, is that so? Well, I’ll just bring her over so you two can meet each other. Not to mention that the ROULETTE really, really needs some customers, right?”

“Sure but I-we got Tokiya.”

Tomochika’s jaw almost hit the floor, her eyes growing wide as she leaned closer to the redhead, exclaiming her disbelief a little too loudly.

“Tokiya?! As in Ichinose Tokiya?!” she asked wildly, causing some heads to turn. The redhead felt like shrinking in his feet, trying to explain the situation.

“Uhm, yes? We’re neighbors. And have been so for two weeks.”

“Oh shit. Ittoki, you’re basically living next to a pseudo-celebrity.”

In that moment, the teacher finally entered the room, apologizing profusely. He threw his coat over the back of a chair and stretched his slim body.

“Ugh, I missed my bus!” Ringo adjusted his long, pink hair. He frowned deeply and unpacked his laptop and notes for today’s lesson.

“And the bus lady decided to hate me for no reason. Jeez.”

After Ringo had voiced his frustrations, he returned to his usual happy self and continued the lesson as if nothing had happened. He eagerly talked and presented about hermeneutics while several other students were joining the discussion, however, Ittoki’s mind was somewhere else.

The lesson flew past him with much unnoticed speed as it would do when one did not pay attention. Before long, Ittoki, still giddy and excited for the day, packed his bags and was among the first to leave the classroom. The clock had just passed 11:05 on the large clock, hanging from the ceiling and Ittoki felt like he had all the time in the world.

He headed upstairs, almost running on the stair case leading to the music rooms. When he finally reached the top, he panted heavily but continued to march forwards. His sweaty palm grabbed the handle of the door, the same door that had lead him to be discovered by Tokiya. And perhaps, they would see bump into each other once more. The thought excited Ittoki as he was about to open when suddenly, he stopped, picking an unfamiliar sound cominf from the other side.

He leaned closer to the door, absorbing every possible tone, he could hear. It was the sound of someone singing. A male’s singing, elegant and refined.

_I want to convey this to only you; In this world, there exists a song,_

_A melody that’s for the two of us alone, a miracle that promised eternity,_

_It was the first time I noticed these feelings…_

Ittoki did not recall ever hearing the song before but he surely remembered the voice. It was Tokiya’s.

_Every moment I was able to spend with you was like a beautiful star_

The redhead leaned closer, closing his eyes as he imagined Tokiya’s singing face. His lips conveying every piece of lyric with every fiber of sincerity; his blue eyes gazing upon his audience with happiness at their enjoyment. It was like a magical lullaby that had been blessed with the power of gods.

_Your words that burned to the very ends of my chest_

_Were like the sun’s warmth_

_My heart took wing…_

The harmonious symphony abruptly stopped, leaving Ittoki cold and hungry for more. He pressed himself against the door, desperately wishing for one more song. He would have clawed at the wood and screamed for more if he was not in public.

“Sing, Tokiya. Please?” he whispered instead.

“It was great. But you lack emotion. Uhm… if I had to compare you and your brother, I’d say that you sound very alike but there’s something missing with you. Is something bothering you?”

A female’s, no, complete stranger’s voice suddenly spoke, almost causing Ittoki to choke on his own spit. He sat up, slowly. A small curiosity as to who Tokiya’s brother was, drowned in an incongruous wave of something dark and painful. Without a second thought, he ripped the door open, preparing to face hell. What he saw though was not the devil, though; it was Tokiya along with some girl. Her green-golden eyes stared intently at Ittoki, and it unnerved him. She was fairly pretty, though. She was of petite, almost frail build with short hair that ranged between red and orange.

“Ikki.” Tokiya was surprised, heading towards the redhead. His tone was callous and Ittoki feared the worst.

“Ikki? Otoya Ittoki?” The girl’s alien eyes shifted between the bluenette and Ittoki, her surprised expression softening.

“Could it be that you know Tomochika Shibuya?” she overpaced Tokiya though her movements were careful. Soon the two youths stood before her. Her perfume was pleasantly sweet, although not as strong as Tomochika’s. Instead of strawberries, it was more like a single rose.

“Uh, yeah. She’s my classmate. Why?”

“Uhm… she’s my friend. She told me about someone with your name. Uh… I’m Haruka Nanami.” She suddenly bowed and looked directly at Ittoki with a flustered look. Her cheeks were flushing.

“Oh. Hi.” Ittoki noticed how strangely alienated he sounded. He felt alike as well; not sure if he should voice his concern for what she was doing with Tokiya but then he suddenly remembered what Tomochika had told him beforehand and his demeanor changed so quickly, he barely noticed.

“Nice to meet you.”

“Same here.” Haruka glanced towards Tokiya. “Oh, and this is my classmate, Tokiya Ichinose.” She waved towards the bluenette, a little shaky.

“He knows.”

“I know.”

The two males said unison, confusing Haruka some more. She stared at them in silence before she stroked a lock of hair behind her ear. “Oh, I see.”

A round of awkward silence entered the room as no one dared to speak up, though it was Ittoki who broke the silence.

“I didn’t know you could sing so well, Ichi.” Ittoki rubbed his fingers, smiling with a hint of awkward admiration before Tokiya, who remained in the same stern position.

“That’s the doing of the honey.”

“Somehow, I don’t trust your word on that.” Ittoki turned to Haruka. “So, what were you doing?” He recognized the same bubbly tone, he used towards everyone. It put him at ease as he did not worry so much about how hostile he may came across as. In the same time, he noticed his jacket laying near the window and he quickly skipped over to pick it up.

“Tokiya and I are in the same study group. We’re currently composing a song for our Christmas project.” Haruka grabbed a handful of notes from her bag, before showing them to Ittoki. Her otherwise timid attitude had lightened up to that of an excited child.

In long sentences, she openly explained the plans to her accords, the tempo, the end; everything needed for a musical piece. Her knowledge of music was vast and seemingly unlimited, throwing several musical glossaries into every other word of her speech. Her enthusiasm fascinated Ittoki and now that he knew more, he could simply not explain his minor aggrievance towards her. In the background, Tokiya remained silent and looked at the paper in his hand.

“Tomochika said that you love music too.”

“Yep. I play guitar from time to time.” And it suddenly hit Ittoki that the only reason as to why he was even here, was to show the new piece of lyric. He turned his attention towards the bluenette, handing him the piece of paper from his pocket.

“Not bad.” Tokiya said after a while, handing the paper to Haruka. “What’s this?” she asked with pure innocence, looking at Ittoki.

“A song.” The redhead replied eagerly and followed the girl’s bright eyes read the same lyrics over and over again.

“It has a good start. I’m sure, you will make a great song out of it.” She gave the paper to Ittoki, taking her time to say more.

“I…if you want, I can help.” Haruka spoke with a lower voice. Her eyes shifted between the two boys, awaiting their response with timid anticipation. She began fiddling with a strain of hair and retracted her gaze to the ground.

“Sure.” Tokiya headed over to pack his things and Ittoki noticed that his laptop laying on the table. Haruka suddenly shot her head upwards, her lips slightly parted before a soft smile appeared on her face.

“I got work to do, though.” The bluenette turned to Ittoki, more calm in tone.

“And I’ll be coming to get my milk.”

With those words, Tokiya left the room and the two others stood in silence and looked at the door. Haruka sighed with relief, gathering her belongings. Occasionally, she would look at Ittoki and smile sincerely, often with flushed cheeks.

“It was nice to meet you.” She bowed once more before skipping out of the room, leaving the redhead a little high on emotions. He made a mental note to make Tokiya sing once more. And calm his nerves near Haruka.

* * *

The ROULETTE was more lively than usual. If only because there was now a total of three people present. Tokiya sat by his usual seat with his ears plugged and the world around him shut off. Sporadically, his reading glasses would slide down to the tip of his nose and he hastily pushed them back to their place and drink his milk. At the table behind him, sat Haruka and Tomochika, enjoying the café’s specialties.

Haruka had ordered a chocolate cake along with some tea while Tomochika had decided to spite Ittoki and take his curry sandwiches. The two girls sat and talked lively about the wonders in life, though Tomochika did most of the talking. Haruka was more delicate, nodding at her friend’s animated tales.

Ittoki leaned over the counter, minding his own business and relishing in Tokiya’s presence. He looked behind him, seeing his boss poking her head out from time to time, giving a thumbs up to Ittoki before disappearing again. By now, the sun had broken free of the clouds and now hid behind the apartment complex across the street.

“Hey Ittoki!” Tomochika waved the redhead over, still loud as ever. She smiled as he closed in on them.

“Why don’t you keep Haruka entertained while I go to the restroom for a bit?” she rose from the table, moving as slowly as possible.

“Huh? That’s not needed, Tomo.” Haruka shook her head, looking like a deer in headlights.

“Hush, child.”

But Haruka took it quite literally and kept her lips sealed as her eyes followed her friend before resting at Tokiya. She silently followed his work from the distance.

“He types really fast. Does he always do that?” Just then, she made eye contact with Ittoki, who turned around with curiosity. From the edges of Tokiya’s shoulders, he saw something resembling an email. The address was obscured by blue strains of hair

“Yeah.” He cleared his throat, trying not to intimidate the girl as he asked. “So how long has the two of you known each other?”

“Since late winter. That’s when our courses started.” Haruka poked some more to her cake.

 “But I get the sense that he is more comfortable with you. He even gave you a nickname.”

 Ittoki’s cheek flushed. “Eehehe… it was my idea.” He quickly turned around to see if Tokiya had noticed the conversation but the bluenette was as distant as ever.

“But you seem pretty close too. I mean, he hasn’t even told me that he got a brother.”

“About that…”Haruka fiddled with the spork, uneasy and thoughtful as if she weighed her words with great caution. “Tokiya is not-how to put this… he doesn’t get along with his brother very well.” Before she could observe Ittoki’s speechless astonishment, her eyes went blank as she buried her face in her hands.

“Son of a female dog, I wasn’t supposed to say that! Sorry!” 

“Guys! I have some awesome news!” Tomochika stomped out the bathroom with her cellphone in hand. She did a quick spin and directed her course towards Tokiya, who had been completely distant from the moment, he plugged those headphones in.

“You too, Mr. Famous.” She ripped the earphone from the ear, earning a death’s glare from Tokiya.

“Do, under no circumstances, call me that.” He pushed his glasses back up again. “What do you want me?”

“Geez, don’t give me that. I’m offering you a chance to flaunt your status. Complete with free drinks and all. Ren is hosting a party and you bet that it’s gonna be wild!” She waved her phone at his face.

“Ren?” Ittoki looked at Haruka, feeling out of place.  He felt like he was severely behind the times. “Is that someone, I should know?”

“You can live your entire life without knowing who he is and it wouldn’t make a difference.” Tokiya narrowed his eyes until they were nothing more but two blue slits. He closed his laptop and looked sternly at Ittoki.

“Bah. Such a mood killer. Anyways, you’re coming, right Ittoki? And Haruka?” Tomochika waved her hand and the bluenette in an aggravated fashion before making way to the two youths, completely unfazed by Tokiya’s intense glare.

“I don’t really know, Tomo…” Haruka’s brows sank. She stared out of the window, her lips forming a thin line as she sat in thought.

“I guess, I can come. “ she finally looked at Tomochika, still very anxious. Her expression did not change when she saw her friend clapped jubilantly.

“Fucking awesome, girl!” Tomochika smiled at Ittoki, tapping her fingers impatiently as she did so. She took a few steps towards him and bowed down, partly revealing her cleavage and much skin hidden behind a burgundy bra. Ittoki shifted between the naked skin and the girl’s smiling face, feeling increasingly uncomfortable. He tried to remember the last time, he had ever seen a woman’s bare chest but the thought of it made him borderline nauseous. Perhaps, he should have told Tomochika that he was gay when she first asked him about a girlfriend.

“Su-sure.” He scratched his nose, laughing anxiously to lead the girl into stepping away from him. Sure, he would have said yes without Tomochika shoving her entire body into his face. But now, it just looked like she pressured him into coming. The situation was still fairly high on the level of awkwardness and Tomochika was the only one, oblivious to the tense atmosphere.

“Great! It’s gonna be so much effing fun!”


	6. Chapter 6

The days that came before that special Friday passed by rather unnoticeably. For once, Ittoki felt like he could breathe or at least live like a normal human and not a working machine. It amazed him how his time with Tokiya made him forget all about the stress thrown at him from school. It was a blissful time indeed.

On an early Friday morning, the redhead sat on his worn out couch and texted. He was incredibly bored and too tired to read the last page for Monday. Somehow, he had felt like he could take on an army and decided to do this week’s homework on a whim but just when he needed one measly page, his energy was drained and he was more exhausted than ever.

He missed Tokiya. He missed him badly.

Due to whatever gorged itself in his time, Tokiya had been working for days on end. Early to leave and late to come home; that was his schedule. How did he even manage to uphold a functioning school life?

Tonight was no different; the clock was 22:30, no signs of Tokiya and Ittoki should have gone to bed. The redhead sat and nodded off but decided against sleeping. Instead, he dragged himself from the couch and fetched his most precious treasure from its place in the room and sat down back again. Inspiration had a weird schedule and when it decided to show up, it was anything but subtle. More accurately, it felt like one was hit in the head by a brick. He repeated the first two lines of their song but when he put his mind to write, his sudden spark had left him. 

_Their song._

There was something beautiful about those two words put together, something intensely intimate. What had been written so far reminded him of a love song. A masterpiece composed by two boys; a gorgeous enigma and an infatuated mortal. The poor mortal that had fallen for the enigmatic beauty.

He should really get going. But the stormy weather and strong wind made him less than willing. He groaned while forcing himself and pack his bag and fix a bland sandwich for breakfast. Sooner or later, he would have to cook something for once. But until he got through the stress that was the first semester, that was a far-fetched dream. Ittoki had hoped that tonight’s party would be kept indoors as forecasters had given warnings of a typhoon. Who in their right mind decided to house a horde of drunken adolescents during a typhoon anyway?

* * *

 The five hours of school flew past Ittoki as were they birds in the sky. There was nothing interesting; nothing that kept Ittoki remotely invested. Instead, he sat and gawked out the window, thinking about tonight. It saddened him that Tokiya outright refused to show up but at the same time, it would be surprising if he did.

“Hello?” Anyone home?” Tomochika whispered, nudging the distant redhead. She frowned as he looked her, disinterested. He said nothing, which annoyed her even more. Tomochika shook her head and narrowed her eyes.

“Dude, what’s up with you?” she huffed, leaning closer to the redhead. Today, she wore a turtleneck so there was luckily no “boob window” in his face. Instead, there was white fabric and the natural softness of women.

“Nothing at all, just thinking.” He averted his eyes.

“About what?”

“Nobo-nothing.”

Tomochika’s aggravation lessened as a sly smile appeared on her face. She twisted a strain of hair between her fingers. She glanced at something next to the redhead, thinking before speaking again.

“About who? Haruka?” She raised her voice a bit, her eyes possessing a sultry look.

“No, it’s not-“

“Don’t be shy, you can tell me.”

“Er… my mom.”

There was a round of awkward silence between the two as Tomochika paused, looking guilty. It was rare for Ittoki to see her like this. Whereas he shrugged his shoulders and returned to his gazing at the window, Tomochika grew wary and silent. It was a cruel move of him to use his own mother to derail the conversation and he felt his consciousness dealing with the aftermath.

“Wanna get some grub before the party?” He asked cheerfully, watching his classmate light up like a Christmas tree. She packed her stuff and eagerly nodded, her golden earrings dangling in rhythm with her movements.

“Sure!” she followed the redhead as they headed towards the cafeteria. Today, like every other day, it was packed to the brim with hungry students. It was rare that Ittoki would even set foot there, as he, unlike everyone else present, couldn’t spare a dime for expensive gourmet food. But his boss had been extra generous and raised his payment after that fateful day where Tomochika and Haruka had entered the ROULETTE.

“So, excited for tonight?” Tomochika clamped down on some pasta, her voice shrill and loud.

“Yeah, I think I am.” Ittoki poked to the noodles in his curry box. Thankfully, they were sort of cheap on Friday. The delicious scent and hot damps carried his face and his mouth watered.

“Is that a yes?”

“Whatever makes your boat float.”

A wave of silence washed in over them as they ate their food in silence. Ittoki wondered if he had deflated Tomochika’s belief that he was just as excited as her. He was about to say something that would hopefully ease this odd atmosphere when their lunchtime was suddenly interrupted.

“Yo.” Syo had arrived, carrying a tray of food and soda. “Mind if I sit?” but he had already sat down. 

“Heard about Ren’s new publicity stunt. I’m considering to go and see how it ends. Wish me luck.”

“Is that so? Well, what a coincidence that we are going as well. Right, Ittoki?” Tomochika said with glee, her mouth filled with food. She looked at Ittoki, who shrugged, a little unnerved by the intense stare.

“Yeah.” He hastily ate his noodles. Syo narrowed his eyes for a bit before shaking his head and leaning back.

“Nice. Can’t wait to see you knock yourself out.” He adjusted his hat, letting the line rest right above his eyebrow. Tomochika smiled brightly, eating her pasta with glee. Ittoki didn’t follow suit on her enthusiasm as he chugged down the last water in his bottle.

“You bet, that I’ll be partying until the sun rises.”

“I’m gonna fill up my bottle.” Ittoki rose from the table, heading to the only water cooler on campus. And of course, a long row had been established. Even though there were two faucets, they worked rather poorly. From the row of people, Ittoki could see a thin stream of water being poured. Only when two people used the water cooler, did that happen, causing the line to last much, much longer.

“Patience is a virtue.” Tokiya suddenly appeared out of nowhere, startling Ittoki. The redhead did a quick U-turn and was greeted by his favorite bluenette and Haruka. The girl shyly waved at Ittoki, gazing upon his nose before looking down. She fiddled nervously with her empty plastic bottle. But only Tokiya captured the redhead’s attention and he felt the longing lingering within stronger than before. He would have given everything to run is hands through those blue locks. But he had no idea of what to reply now.

Tokiya pointed forwards, forcing the redhead out of his fantasies. Ittoki shifted around, only to see that it was his turn to refill his bottle. For a moment, he wondered if magic had taken place. Time had passed so quickly; he had not noticed the line dwindling away.

* * *

The music blasted from inside the large building, despite the wind roaring outside. Ren’s house was massive and grand in design with its many windows and elegant gate. Behind the metal barrier, was the commotion of many people present, sober or otherwise. Excited, albeit a little nervous as he had not attended any sort of party since the first half of his high school senior years, Ittoki braced himself, following Syo through the gate. There was quite the walkway between that and the actual house.

“Why do all rich folks keep an entire road to their own mansions?” Syo sighed, grimacing and frowning. He made sure to place a steady hand on his fedora in order to keep it from flying away. According to Ittoki, Syo should not complain though; unlike him, who had the luxury of being driven directly to Ren’s house by his brother, Ittoki was forced to rely on public transportation and the nearest bus stop was around a mile away. In normal weather, this would have been little of a problem but on this stormy night, the cold winds chilled to the bone and no amount of running could ever warm the body. The pair came across a small group of girls stood outside, huddled together like shady vultures.

“Because it looks fancy.” Ittoki averted his gaze from the girls, who glared back before returning to whatever matter they were dealing with. Even if their postures and attitudes were more in line with dangerous thugs, they were actually very stylish, too stylish for a simple house party.

“Well, fancy doesn’t equal practical then. I mean, do they drive to retrieve the mail every day?” It appeared that Syo hadn’t noticed the unfriendly bunch and instead ranted about the impracticalities of the wealthy.

“Why don’t you ask Ren?”

An uncooperative glare from Syo quickly cemented that question and the strong smell of cologne as the host of the evening attended to his latest guests. Ren smiled his confident smile, amongst the horde of girls around him. Syo crinkled his nose for a bit before composing himself, trying to appear fearless and carefree.

“Hey there, smug snake.”

“Hello, munchkin.”

Ittoki could see his friend’s blood boiling as evident by the blonde’s ears glowing red. Even still, he kept his sassy façade. The redhead shrugged; fearing that Syo would flip his lid and literally jump Ren right then and there. Ittoki prepared himself to grab him, should anything go down.

“Ittoki!” Tomochika, the holy angel of mercy, came to his rescue, swinging an arm around the redhead as she dragged him away from the commotion. In terms of dressing, Tomochika looked no different from the group of girls from before; way too stylish with her black high-heeled boots clicking against the floor.

In the next room, there were several groups consisting of tables and chairs scattered all over. And one curved couch in the corner, where a frightened Haruka sat. In contrast to Tomochika, her code of dressing was much more modest and subdued. Her eyes glowed like a Christmas Tree when she lay eyes on Ittoki. The redhead sat down, sandwiched between the girls.

“What about Syo?” he asked, bordering on the shouting due to the loud music.

“He’ll be fine. There is no way that he’s gonna punch Ren or something because of a petty insult.” Tomochika yelled back before moving towards the end of the couch.

“Hold up,” she smiled. “I’ll get you two something to drink.”

Ittoki wondered what Tokiya would do in such a situation. Would he get intoxicated beyond characterization? Ittoki really had to start thinking about other stuff than Tokiya. The bluenette was not present and his admirer had come to this party out of his own merit. But now, since he was alone with Haruka, who did also spend time alone with him on several occasions, he saw this as an opportunity to fuel his massive crush.

“Haruka…” he began. “About Tokiya’s brother… could you tell me more please?”

The girl looked at him in surprise, blinking a couple of times before she smiled ever so kindly.

“I think the right person to ask is Tokiya. It’s bit of a sore subject. Teehee.” she laughed nervously.

“Drink up.” A red bottle with the label “Hot ’n’ Sweet” and three small glasses were placed on the table by Tomochika, who quickly seated herself again. Without asking if anyone even wanted to drink, she just began filling the glasses with what looked like soya and smelled like pomegranate. Haruka’s eyes grew wide in horror and she promptly tried to scold her friend.

“Tomo!” was all it amounted to and it helped very little as she was handed a glass and so was Ittoki. The two youths stared at the liquid, demanding an explanation from Tomochika.

“Cheers! You too, Haruka. You timid mouse.” She said, chugging the liquid down with a straight face. Ittoki reluctantly drank his share, the overly sweet taste tormenting his taste buds. This persuaded Haruka to drink as well, coughing when she emptied her glass. Her mouth twisted and she squinted her eyes, looking seconds away from puking.

“Good girl.” Tomochika clapped, causing Haruka to glare at her.

“Please don’t call me that.”

“One more!” Tomochika refilled the glasses and drank her share, all in the span of a minute.

“Things are so much funnier when you’re drunk!” she said, drinking once more, before the two others could even get to drink themselves. She was like an endless well, drinking the shots without ever feeling sick. Thirsty for more, she left the table and came back with another bottle. Her walk cycle however was a little wobbly this time, almost slamming the bottle on the table in a beginning stupor.

“Tomo, you shouldn’t drink anymore.” Haruka leaned over Ittoki, shaking her friend to keep her from blacking out. And she was not far behind; her gaze lacked focus and she had an arguably hard time getting a hold of Tomochika because she fumbled her arms around in the air like a confused monkey.

“Then Ittoki will drink for me. Get a move on, boy.” Tomochika slurred through her words in the manner of a drunk sailor as she sloppily pushed her glass to Ittoki. The redhead crinkled his nose and chugged down the shot regardless, internally gagging from the sweet liquid. He put the glass down and gently tapped Haruka’s shoulder, causing her to sit back down. Quickly she realized that it was not the end of it and she moved away for Ittoki to stand up.

“I think I’ll be going for a walk. Catch you later.”

“Uhm…” Haruka’s pleading eyes enticed him. It was amazing that her light voice could even remotely be heard in this haze of loud music. Ittoki wondered if it was the workings of the alcohol. He could feel the pit of his stomach burning, a feeling he hadn’t been feeling since his days in high school.

“You don’t mind if I come along?” Haruka brought him back from memory lane, moving away from the couch.

“What about Tomochika?” they both looked at their friend, who now had fetched up her cellphone and was texting someone, deeply concentrated.

“Don’t worry about me. I’ll find my fun somewhere, somehow.”

Haruka and Ittoki took this as a cue to let themselves loose. The number of people seemed to have no end as everywhere Ittoki turned, he saw a new horde of humans, few of whom he had seen around campus, once or twice perhaps. Yet almost all of them looked to no older than 25. As they walked, he noticed that Haruka was uncharacteristically close to him, looking more like a cat on hot bricks with every passing moment. He increasingly felt guilty for her predicament; she was completely new to campus life and already she had forced into going to a party. A house party for one of the most famous people on campus nonetheless. Or infamous depending on who was asked. Regardless, a lot of people would come and it was no surprise. Humans were truly social creatures.

“Yo, Ittoki!” Syo called out, holding a beer bottle in his hand. He moved to the pair, eyeing Haruka a couple of times before waving casually at her. His eyes, however, rested a little lower than her face; the “pillow zone”.

“Who’s your new friend?” Syo asked, still looking at Haruka and it unnerved her. She quickly looked at Ittoki, indicating that the redhead should answer for her.

“Tomochika’s friend.”

“Haruka Nanami.” They said in unison, looking at each other as they did so. “Pleased to meet you.” She bowed and Syo just looked at her, surprise all written on his face. There was a wave of awkward silence before Ittoki deemed it appropriate to change the subject.

“What happened to Ren?”

“Hijirikawa happened. He just appeared of out nowhere, told me to get my shit together and vanished.” Syo fiddled around with the bottle, dangerously close to dropping it.

“Honestly, I’m glad that he did ‘cause otherwise, I would have smashed his head into his stomach. But the look on his face when Hijirikawa came was absolutely priceless. Though it makes me wonder why Ren then chased after him.”

Ittoki blinked, processing this new information. He first tried to put a face on that name but failed, as an attempt to play out the scene in his head. Another moment of silence arrived, putting the mood in an awkward position. But Syo quickly changed the subject, his eyes analyzing every inch of Haruka before eventually looking at Ittoki.

“Wanna help with some beer bowling? I’m looking for some players and a judge.”

“Sure, it sounds fun.” The redhead smiled, though he had never heard of the game before. He didn’t feel like asking Haruka as the chances of her joining would be at zero percent.

“Uhm… I don’t know the rules but I’d like to play as well.” There was an oddly blank expression on Haruka’s face as she said that and her cheeks grew a little red, perhaps the effects of the alcohol kicking in. She stared blankly at the two boys before her and while Ittoki just stared back at a loss for words, Syo took the chance to get acquainted with the girl, swooping in near her.

“Great. Welcome to the team.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made this chapter longer to set the mood and get directly to the drama for the sake of narrative.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There were some jarring errors in the last chapter which should be fixed. The thing about me is that I write “completed” but raw chapters and only fully edit when I am about to post. I run them through Word’s spellcheck (it’s quite sloppy) and then Grammarly, my sweet angel. Well, I didn’t use the latter so Word half-assed its way through the chapter and for that, I apologize.   
> Anyhoo, WARNING: homophobic language up ahead.

So, the beer bowling was set outside in the backyard. It was a ridiculous choice but given the number of guests, there was little space to play the game anywhere else. Carrying the last chair, Ittoki put on a fake smile as he internally cursed the rain that kept shooting at him like bullets. He was already completely soaked after five minutes of being outside and he feared the increasing chance of him getting a cold or something worse.

“Syo, couldn’t you just ask Ren for a room or something?” the redhead placed the chair in the wet grass. He shivered like a frozen puppy, and he wondered how Haruka, who wore even less, could withstand the cold. She stood with some kind of blue drink in her hand, sipping away as the look in her eyes grew more distant.

“Haruka, maybe you should take a break.” Ittoki approached the girl, only to receive a disjointed and timid smile.

“You should really try this. It’s good. They call it… uhm” She chugged down the rest of the drink. “What did they call it again? Oh yeah, polar bears!”

Quite grotesquely, she wiped her face wth the back of her palm and happily strolled her way to the band of players, Syo had managed to find. Which consisted of just two people; a young boy, who looked a good amount of years too short for being here and a prince. That was the best way Ittoki could describe the latter; a prince. But he was leagues behind of Tokiya.

On the other hand, people had heard of the news and a smaller crowd began to gather, all curious to see a group of half-drunk university students trying play bowling with beers. Surely they found the upcoming shenanigans entertaining. Especially, Tomochika as she now staggered her way to the group, giggling like mad.

“Haru, you’re not you.” She swung an arm around her friend, rocking her back and forth. Her drink was blood red, even redder than her hair.

“Need I turn it around and fire it at your face?”

“Touché, girl.” Tomochika dragged Haruka to the sidelines and they continued to talk albeit Ittoki could no longer hear their conversation but he saw a completely different side to Haruka. No longer was she the timid mouse but she now spoke loudly and clearly. Their energy attracted the attention of many and soon a swarm of strangers had surrounded the girls.

Ittoki watched them from afar, thinking back to the comfort of his bed. Complete with a warm curry. When would those people start their stupid game? Seeing Syo positioning himself in one end of the playing field, Ittoki made way to his friend.

“Yo, Ittoki. It’s you and me against Reiji and Ai.” Somehow, Syo managed to get a soccer ball that he kept pressed under his arm. The redhead internally fought the urge to snatch the ball and play some soccer. At least it would keep him from freezing to death.

“Where did you get that?” he asked instead and Syo pointed towards their opponents and more specifically, the brunette.

“Reiji had one in his car.”

Upon seeing Syo and Ittoki, he walked over to the two with a bright smile on his face. He, too, was unfazed by the downpour even if his hair hung around his face like wet curtains. His eyes met Ittoki’s and it only seemed to further boost his enthusiasm.

 “Oh, so you must be Otoya. Mind if I call you Otoyan?”

“Nope.”

“Goodie. This ought to be much fun. Right, Ai-Ai?” Reiji looked at his partner, who had been following the scene with a dead expression on his face and it was no different now. He nodded with that robotic expression, eyeing Ittoki. He followed Reiji to the other end of the playing field and the game was set with yet another kid as the judge. The kid smiled smugly, from his seat on the sidelines. The rain poured down over his umbrella, leaving him relatively dry.

The players found the way to their stations and the game began with a fair audience to witness it all go down. Some audience members offered their drinks to their players as the rules demanded that the losers always drank. How could it be that no one found it odd that a group of adolescents played beer bowling during cloudburst? Or maybe Ittoki wasn’t drunk enough to abandon his logic. He wondered how he would act around Tokiya when the inevitable happened and social custom demanded that he was intoxicated. From the corner of his eye, he saw Haruka entering the playing field with two cups in hand.

“Here.” She said, handing Syo and Ittoki the cups that contained a blue liquid. It had a sweet scent but it looked like the liquidation of those blue crystals, he made in chemistry class.

“Permission to start!” Ai yelled out with a deadpanned voice to somewhat drown out the windy weather. The kid with the umbrella crossed his legs, glancing over the other team.

“Permission granted.”

 _This is not going to end well_ , Ittoki thought to himself, feeling his enthusiasm slipping away like sand in an hourglass.

From the house, the music still played, even louder than before. Loads of shouting and cheering emerged as the next song played and Ittoki recognized it. It was Hayato; the song, Tokiya cut off that morning. The redhead pierced his hearing, trying to catch any faults with the song but it was impossible. He found himself sucked in, carried away by that beautiful voice.

_With a special mood, you can become happy!_

_Do you know the magic words~?_

_There’s no reason to lie to yourself~_

_Look up at the sun and see!_

That voice, however, sounded awfully familiar. That was no surprise, considering HAYATO was Tokiya’s brother.

“What the fuck, man?!” Syo cured all of a sudden and the redhead noticed that their one pin, an empty bottle, had been knocked down. From the other side of the playing field, Reiji cheered and clapped his hands like a giddy schoolgirl while Ai simply swept some wet bangs to the side.

“One point to the tight lane. Left lane, drink your punishment.”

Without further cursing, Syo took a large sip whereas Ittoki was more refined. It reminded him of Tokiya. Again, he should stop thinking about Tokiya. Syo positioned the bottle and prepared to throw the ball, looking at the judge. The rain poured down like there was no tomorrow and Ittoki was freezing terribly. Having to sit on his butt and watch was much harder than he ever thought it to be.    

“Permission to play.” Syo grunted, trying to hone his aim and focus on the bottle that stood between his opponents. He smirked with confidence

“Permission denied.”

“What?! Mikado, you cannot be serious!”

“Just kidding. Permission granted.” Mikado sent the blonde a cheeky smile and Syo calmed down as he rolled the ball towards Reiji and Ai. However, the ball completely missed the bottle and rolled under Reiji’s chair.

“Oh my, looks like you missed.”

“No fucking shit.”

Mikado looked over the situation with a devious smile on his lips. He leaned forward, his gaze coincidently piercing Ittoki’s.

“Sex position.”

“Eh? What-“ before Ittoki could even begin to process what ha been said, he was suddenly pulled out of his chair and pushed over, causing him to plant his fists into the wet grass. Completely swept off his feet, he looked around frantically, and just happened to lay eyes on Ai and Reiji, who were in the middle of what looked like dry humping. Ai was placed on all four while Reiji hovered above him, his face all red.

His rear was suddenly pressed up against Syo’s groin.

“What’s going on?”

“Please don’t ask.”

 _What kind of a game was this?_ This was complete madness. And the alcohol in his system dd not make anything better. His mind kept shifting back to Tokiya and he wished to be back at his apartment and write song lyrics than doing this. Tides in the pit of his stomach turned mercilessly and he felt nauseous. It didn’t help that Syo was wearing skinny jeans and although he was limp as an asparagus, Ittoki could still feel the outline of his member and through the wet fabric, his skin was extra sensitive. He wanted to curse his erection to a land far away. And it made him feel sick.

Yellow, ill-scented liquid poured out of his mouth like a waterfall, causing his stomach to curl and twist in painful ways. On the sidelines, people were exclaiming profanities and statements of surprise. It felt like forever before the stream finally stopped and Ittoki could look at today’s dinner flooding the grass.  His mind blank and everything felt completely alien to him. His stomach ached terribly and had he not been aware that he stood in public, he would have opened his mouth wide and drink the rain. Just about anything to wash away this nastiness.

“Otoya. You’re disqualified.” Mikado had no sympathy. Rather, he bordered on disgusted, frowning with that same bratty smugness, he had displayed under this game.

“Fine! I’d rather be.” The redhead mumbled coldly. He was pretty sure that his soaked clothes could fill a couple of buckets. He got up and staggered his way inside. The threat of nausea was still strong and he dreaded the rest of this evening.

\-----------------------------------

He should not be drinking when he just puked fifteen minutes ago. Not to mention that he was not accustomed to the taste of beer. To Ittoki, it smelled and tasted like moldy bread and it looked like early morning urine. But it was a good medicine to numb the nerves. Like crack was the magic to make people moderately happy. Or so that was what he had been told.

He found a lonely chair near a window, where he sat down. From his seat, he could see the players continuing with beer bowling and the subtle feeling of frustration grew stronger. The burning of his stomach had grown into an unnatural satiety and yet he continued to drink. And not surprisingly, he felt like puking once more.

In the background, HAYATO’s song had been sent on repeat. The crowd screamed the lyrics of the song and the composition was so messy and disjointed that Ittoki could not determine what they even were singing. When at least 30 people screamed the lyrics of a song in an attempt to sing, it wasn’t so much a choir as a band of cats being mauled by a dog with rabies.

How he wanted to go home. Ittoki leaned over the table, not caring whether it was clean or not. He was on the verge of falling asleep when suddenly a group of young men, all older than him, caught his attention, by the way, they looked at him. They kept staring and whispering, putting little effort into being discrete.

“Hey, isn’t that the guy who lives next to Ichinose?”

“I think it is. Poor guy. That Ichinose is a total asshole.”

Ittoki’s ear perked and he stood up, despite his better judgment asking him not to do anything foolish. The group noticed his approach and whispered among themselves with less volume. They huddled closer to each other like a pack of wolves.

“What about Tokiya?” Ittoki clenched his fists.

“Oh, just the rumors that he works a lot of shady jobs.”

“Like what?”

The men looked at each other, their gazes telling a thousand words and Ittoki picked up none of them. He didn’t expect them to answer so he prepared to push them to do his bidding when one of them looked him straight into the eyes, gravely serious.

“I heard he was a prostitute.”

Something within Ittoki snapped. All senses left him completely and it was like his mind was forced out of his body by something dark and cold. Something lurking within that made him lose it. Ittoki saw himself raise his fist and plant in the face of one of the men; his teeth scraping the redhead’s skin, all happening with the span of 20 seconds or so. Ittoki snapped back reality, looking at the damage he had done in pure disbelief.

“You little faggot. You’re going to regret that!” Some other guy said and a bloody fight broke out as he landed a punch eerily close to the redhead’s eye, sending him stumbling backward. The commotion gathered the attention of many and a small mob had begun to form. But that didn’t affect Ittoki as he jumped forwards and threw an uppercut to the guy’s jaw. There was little time to be surprised by his own strength as he was soon ganged up on and a barrage of attacks showered him. The metallic taste of blood hit his tastebuds but it did not detour him from his mindless rage. He pushed forward, brawling like an animal.

“That’s enough! Stop it before I kick all of you out. Immature little brats!” Someone familiar shouted through the crowd and the room went eerily silent. They moved aside for Ren to pass, his movements, unlike everything anyone, had seen before. His eyes shot lightning, his forehead frowned and his lips forming a thin line. He looked ready to murder. Among the audience, there were whispers and a phew cellphones recording the scuffle.

“That asshole over there threw the first punch.” some guy said.

Ittoki could not recall his actions even if he wanted to. He blankly looked as everyone stared him down for an explanation but there was nothing to it. He fiddled through his pocket to get the one thing that could bring him some level of joy, only to realize that his mother’s rosary was gone.

He saw the cross laying near some of the men, though none of them had noticed it by now. Without complying with the silent wish, he walked straight over to the group. They glared daggers at him, some stepping back while others got ready to kick and punch, should anything happen. But the redhead was done with them. If his mood was terrible before, then it had hit rock bottom by now. Kneeling to get the rosary, one of the men stepped up before him.

“What do you think you’re doing?” but he got no answer as Ittoki kept kneeling and waiting, his fingertips inches away from his precious treasure. He was extremely fatigued now and the nausea had abandoned all mercy. He clutched his stomach while trying to reach his rosary. But a sudden hard blow knocked him backward and he slammed his head against the cold floor, his consciousness slipping away.  The crowd caused a massive uproar and profanities were thrown left and right. But despite all that noise, it all drowned before they could reach the redhead.

For a moment, he wished to never wake up. Instead, he could lay here forever and always, entering a deep sleep that would last forever. He had no strength or will to fight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In regards to the rules of booze bowling or beer bowling as they call it where I’m from, those are the rules that we play with. And the lack of structure? Well, Mikado as judge doesn’t leave much room for anything else but mischief. Also, concerning the many unexplained things that happened up until now, they will be explained in the other stories as they all take place at the same time and universe. I can’t remember if I’ve already said this but if I have, apologies for the repeating.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man, I’m having a blast writing this! Thank you all so much for the kuds and stuff.

The stormy winds howled through the complexes, awaking Ittoki. He flailed around for a bit and kicked off the thin blanket. He lay completely still now, staring at the ceiling. He blinked a couple of times, feeling like a rock under water. His head was pounding; both on the inside and outside and his entire body felt like lead. The chill of Autumn chilled him as he realized that he wore clothing completely alien to him. A white shirt and black pants, one size too big.

Where was he even?

Fumbling his palm over the table to find his phone, he suddenly felt something cold and hard on his fingertips. It was his mother’s rosary. He felt somewhat calmer even though he was probably in some stranger’s home.

And then the events of the previous night flashed before his eyes. He saw himself losing beer bowling; he saw himself drinking his arousal away, only for it to get worse; he saw himself punching an asshole in the face. He heard his frantic screams as it hit him that he had dropped the rosary. He also remembered Ren coming to the scene and throwing Ittoki out.

Ittoki looked at his knuckles. Though they had been wiped clean of blood, there was still scratches of the guy’s teeth. The redhead grazed his fingertips across the bruised skin. He sat up, regretting that action immediately as the pounding got worse. There were unnatural, nauseating tides roaming in his stomach as he tried to move. He made a mental note of thanking whoever took him in but before that, he made it a quest to find the bathroom.

The redhead staggered his way forth, the floor rocking under him like a boat on the sea. He looked down and saw his blurry reflection in the wooden floor, albeit rather hard to distinguish. Finally, he found the door to the bathroom, slumping his way in. He would be startled by what he saw but frankly, he wasn’t. Not when he remembered the aftermath of that one punch, which led to a cesspool of uncontrolled hate, fueled by alcohol. Ittoki had been influenced as well and thus, his face was now a swollen mess of blue and red. He could barely see through his right eye and his upper lip was busted.

“You shouldn’t move around so much.” Tokiya suddenly stood in the doorway, with a shopping bag in hand. He looked incredibly tired and his gaze wavered unlike his usual stare. He promptly dropped it and headed towards the redhead, all with this calm and cold expression. Ittoki, a little startled, let out a loud and surprised shriek. His heart was kickstarted into beating at Mach speed. The guy had entered without as much as a sound.

“I bought some aspirin.” Tokiya’s voice was strangely light, like if he was feeling out of place. He bent down to sear through the bag and a pill bottle emerged in his hand. He avoided the redhead’s eyes, his cheeks flushing a bit.

“Ichi?”

“Go back to bed.” He said, surprised at how gloomy he sounded. Ittoki wanted to protest; he had missed Tokiya terribly and now when they were in proximity of each other’s presences for once, there was no way he was going to bed. He tried hard to come up with some sort of peaceful objection when a flashback crossed his mind and he felt the heat rising from inside and coursing to his veins.

“I remember something. Could it be that we..?”

Tokiya’s face went bright red and a distasteful expression crawled over his face. He just stared at the redhead in complete silence. His expression said it all and Ittoki now knew. He clenched his fist around the pill bottle and swiped his blue bangs from his eyes. It appeared that he had not cut his hair for a while.

“I… I don’t feel too good….” The redhead muttered, his vision distorting and reality fading in and out. The room span around him mercilessly and Tokiya’s eyes grew wide in horror. Everything blackened and Ittoki loose sense of gravity.

“Ikki?” Tokiya’s worried voice grew distant, drowning before his ears. Colors blended together as heaven and Earth collided into one another and he felt his senses leaving and his body falling to the floor.

* * *

When Ittoki woke up, his head rested in the lap of Tokiya. The bluenette stroked his red hair with attentiveness. The two boys locked eyes for a brief second before both looked away. After a while Tokiya sighed heavily.

“Don’t do that again.” Tokiya said sternly and looked at the rosary at the table. His stroking remained unchanged.

“Wha…?”

“Pass out and vomit. You scared me half to death.” The bluenette crinkled his nose with disgust and he finally looked at Ittoki, his expression tired but stern.

“Not to mention that you’re heavier than you look.”

“Sorry.” The redhead turned away, thinking of something to say as silence entered the room. Ittoki looked around in Tokiya’s apartment and something odd became apparent; there were no photos of people, no family no friends, not even a graduation. It was no secret that the amount of decoration was scarce and lacking in variety aside from a few vases and paintings but it lacked any sense of individuality. But he shouldn’t dwell on that. Considering what Haruka had told him, it made more sense now, even if it left him curious.

“What happened last night?” He asked instead.

“Tomochika called me, asking me to come and pick you up because you were drunk and battered. What were you thinking starting a fight?”

“Uhm, people trashtalked you, pretty badly.” Ittoki began, feeling the anger slowly boiling from within. Tokiya was not surprised by the revelation, simply waiting for more information.

“They called you prostitute.”

“Ittoki, I have been the subject of all the names in the book. If I had a penny for every time, someone had called me something, I’d be living the rest of my days on my own private island.” Tokiya shook his head with a carefree smirk.

The redhead calmed down a bit and he felt a little better with the fact that he had in a sense defended Tokiya’s honor, even if it turned out to be a useless move. Even still, he could still feel the rage lurking in the pit of his stomach and his smile wavered a bit.

“You don’t actually believe them, do you?”

“N-no.” Of course, he didn’t. He couldn’t imagine Tokiya subjecting himself to something so demeaning, not to mention it looked like he was working constantly aside from studying. How could Ittoki ever become so mad at such a ludicrous accusation? He sighed, forcing himself to forget the uneasiness. Everything was fine now. Ittoki turned to Tokiya, ready to ask some questions.

“What happened afterwards?

“I brought you here and gave you some clean clothes. And then you…” The bluenette suddenly stopped, his face turning crimson. It contrasted heavily against his blue hair. Tokiya looked away, snapping his mouth shut but it did not take him long before he spoke again, his voice low and his eyes darted away to something else.

“You kissed me. On the cheek.”

“Why?”

“Don’t give me that, you were the one who came on to me after I gave you your rosary!”

“…Can I do it again?” The redhead whispered, looking at a wall to avoid Tokiya’s reaction. Nervously, he fumbled his thumbs around, dreading the tense atmosphere. The silence spoke for itself; Ittoki had messed up. He sighed internally and was about to rise when the bluenette stroking suddenly ceased. Ittoki was meet with confused blue eyes, when he looked at Tokiya.

“I didn’t quite hear you.” The bluenette said all of a sudden, genuinely unsure of the voiced request. “What did you say?”

“Ahaha… just forget it. I just talked to myself.” Ittoki sat up, feeling so unnaturally cold suddenly. He faintly looked at Tokiya, trying his best to smile. What in the world was he thinking? Why did he do such a thing? There was no way that Tokiya would oblige to something like that, not in a million years! What Ittoki did yesterday was a foolish, selfish attempt of superficial affections, nothing less nothing more. Of course, Tokiya was feeling awkward.

“Very well then.” Tokiya looked bewildered at the redhead but soon stood, gently pushing the redhead aside.

His face was still red and Ittoki’s heart was bursting out of disappointment. There was an ocean of words and confessions that he wanted to say but fear of absolute chaos frightened the redhead and thus, he did the painful deed and withheld his feelings, save for gratitude.

“Thanks for finding my rosary. It means the world to me.”

“I didn’t find it. Hijirikawa did.”

“He did?” The redhead sat up, despite the aching pain. He made a mental note of thanking Hijirikawa sometime. If he ever found out who he was.

Tokiya said nothing, keeping his signature stone face before he shrugged with a small smirk on his face and fetched the aspirin from the pill bottle. He made way to the kitchen and the sound of running water could be heard afterwards.

“I didn’t expect you to be religious.” It came the kitchen.

“Actually, I’m not.” Ittoki smiled tiredly as Tokiya existed the kitchen with a glass in hand. The bluenette stopped dead in his tracks, his eyes narrowing in suspicion.

“It’s a gift from my mother.” Ittoki clenched the cross on his hand, the cold metal slowly heating up in his palm. When he opened his fist, he saw small engravings of the linings in his skin. The rosary was made from cheap metal with black pearls and four white ones as a chain. Gazing upon brought a slew of comfort to Ittoki as he saw his mother’s smiling face every time, he looked at it. He had grown to love this piece and treasured it above all.

“She gave it to me when she brought me home. I carry it with me every day.” The redhead placed it on the table, his hands shaking a little bit by a bump next to him. As refined as Tokiya was, he truly had a lazy way of sitting down. Ittoki had always imagined that he would carefully bend his knees to pinpoint the exact place where his butt would make impact with whatever furniture at the given moment to make a perfect landing or at least, it looked that way in the ROULETTE. Instead he would just toss himself down like a sloth. A very sexy sloth.

“…It may be unpolite of me to ask but what do you mean by ‘brought home’?”

“Truth of the matter is that I’m adopted.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“It’s fine. I never really knew my parents to begin with.” The redhead sat up, still feeling dizzy. He leaned back on the couch, resting against the leather pillows.

“At least your adoptive mother cares about you.” A dark shadow crept over Tokiya’s face as he spoke and he looked away from Ittoki, his voice filled with a sudden harsh coldness.

“My family and I don’t talk.” He said lowly, the bitterness dripping from his voice. Ittoki saw him clenching his fist until the knuckles became white as chalk and he remembered what Haruka had told him that day. And what she said during that party.

“…Not even your brother?” The redhead reluctantly said, his heart skipping a beat when Tokiya stared at him with contempt. The bluenette’s gaze was ice cold and piercing like a needle as he continued to stare at Ittoki.

“Haruka told you, didn’t she?”

Ittoki could only nod, fearing for the worst. He sat in anticipation and awaited a firestorm but instead what he got was a sorrowful chuckle. Tokiya ran a hand through his hair, ending the action with a rub on his forehead. A loud snort suddenly emerged from him, putting the redhead on edge.

“Are you crying?” Ittoki asked with guilt and horror. And an ounce of morbid curiosity as he could never imagine someone like Tokiya to actually cry. He closed on him, ready to hug him if a “yes” was sobbed.

“What? No, I’m-achoo!... I’m just ill.”

The handsome god getting ill was a frightening thought for Ittoki and his mother’s protective genes broke through. When he was younger and could afford to stay out of school for more than just two days, his mother would keep him confined to the house until she made absolutely sure that he was healthy again. And Ittoki now felt that feeling coursing through his veins.

The redhead placed a hand on Tokiya’s forehead, causing him to flinch by that unexpected action.

“You’re burning up.”

* * *

 

Ittoki didn’t dare to ingest anything else but coke and potato chips in fear of it all exiting through the bodily entrance, His appetite was at an all-time zero so even if he wanted to, he couldn’t eat anything. But he was feeling slightly better as the day went by. The same could not be said for Tokiya; by now he was shivering, hidden underneath several blankets.  

“Here.” Ittoki placed the hot milk on the table and sat down in the couch. He watched in anticipation as the bluenette drank it slowly. He then curled up in a ball and covered himself, his blue hair sticking out like strays. The couch was too small for two people so Ittoki, still sore from yesterday’s adventures, sat in the foot end. A minute or so had passed and Tokiya stood on his feet again, heading towards the bedroom. Ittoki wrote it off as a request for peace so he filled the couch a little more, laying down to relieve himself of the pain. He was on the verge of sleeping when Tokiya suddenly emerged from the bedroom, covered in blankets with a pen and paper in hand.

“Ichi?” Ittoki yawned, blinking a couple of times as the bluenette sat down and wrote something on the paper.

“It has been a while since we have done so. Now, where were we?” immediately after saying that, he coughed loudly, wheezing and snapping for air. For a moment, Ittoki thought he would choke. But as soon as that happened, he returned to his calm self, looking like he was never ill to begin with. After a while though, the illness caught up with him and he had to put the paper away from him to rub his eyes and cough.

“It’s my turn, isn’t it?” Ittoki snatched the paper, having no idea of what to write as he pulled his knees to his chin. He reread the first line and tried to enter Tokiya’s state of mind. Feeling a spark of inspiration ignite within him, he completed the line, everlastingly proud of himself. On the paper stood the following.

_My heart is burning …and singing. Why is it?_

Tokiya leaned closer, his warm shoulders rubbing against Ittoki. He simply nodded, looking pleased before coughing again. He reached for the pen and slowly wrote on the paper, his writing noticeably more jagged and crude due to his knees as the underlay.

“A painted future” it stood on the paper. Tokiya looked the completion over before he lay down all of a sudden, his fever appearing to take the upper hand. He groaned in discomfort, his head covered by the blankets. For a second, Ittoki thought about leaning over and giving the bluenette a small kiss on the forehead.

“Hey Ichi. Thanks for everything, you really deserve your rest.” He said instead, smiling to himself as he soon drifted away toward a deep slumber.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drama and plot while things go a bit avery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the lack of updates; I got an early Christmas present which is a tablet so I've been spending more time than healthy drawing and stuff.

The weather had yet to change and the temperature fell rapidly to the single digits. More people came to the ROULETTE for a pit stop until the bad weather passed but as it never seemed to cease, they just gave up and left. The weather reports had been gloomy with threats of cloudburst in the middle of the week, around Wednesday evening. Ittoki dreaded that day, particularly because that was the day where he was early to arrive for class and late to leave. At times like this, he’d rather stay at home and watch hell break loose from a dry safe haven. 

There was still an hour until Ittoki was done with work but he had been rather busy today as more guests would take a quick stop by. And of course, Tokiya was there as well, typing away on his laptop. From the counter of the café, Ittoki watched him like he always did after having brought the hot milk. The redhead smiled to himself; everything was back to normal. His crush had remained unchanged; in fact, it had grown and now stood in full bloom like a meadow of flowers. It made his heart flutter for miles and it filled his body with a pleasant warmth. The lasting soreness of his body was slowly ceasing but he still had to watch out just how he lay down, especially concerning his face.

He wiped a few cups and plates before putting them on their place. When he returned from the kitchen, he was met with the image of Tokiya laying down on the table, seemingly resting. Ittoki thought none of it, thinking that Tokiya was not feeling much better since the aftermath of the failed party.

“You look bummed out.”

Tokiya withheld his answer while sitting up and rubbing his eyes tiredly. He was extremely pale, even more than he normally was. He laid down again, his glasses on the verge of breaking.

“I’m fine.” He muttered under his sleep, breathing deeply. He had no reaction whatsoever when Ittoki removed his glasses; rather it served as a gateway to lay better on the table. Soon, Tokiya had fallen asleep and Ittoki, feeling the warmth coursing through his veins, gently stroked a lock of blue hair away.

“Otoya!” his boss called from the office, leaving that place for once. There was a surprising lack of cigarettes. The redhead walked up to her, hoping for a raise.

“I got some great news for you.” She said. “You’re getting coworkers.”

The revelation completely took him off guard. He blinked a couple of times, waiting for his boss to explain herself. They’ll be starting next week. Rad, right? That is what you kids say nowadays, true?”

“No, we don’t.” Ittoki shook his head. He had never heard her talk like that and frankly, he wished for it to be the last time, she ever spoke like that. But on the other hand, new coworkers would mean that he wouldn’t work so much as he did and maybe more costumers would arrive, resulting in an economic boom and a raise for Ittoki. Not to mention that he could spend some more private time with Tokiya. Speaking of which, the bluenette prepared to leave, looking like he could collapse at any given moment. And Ittoki could not come to his rescue as there was still an hour until his shift was done. Sure, they lived right across the ROULETTE but still….

The redhead watched with much worry as he made his way with a cup of warm chocolate for another customer. An unlikely one even. Syo sat close to the counter with today’s newspaper. It was quite odd since he never cared much for the news. But right now, he decided to sit down and read a newspaper. Ittoki grew curious but also slightly anxious by the blonde’s grave expression. He caught a glimpse of the story, Syo was reading. Something about a fire in the former HQ of some rich folks.

“Here you go.” Ittoki put the coffee on the table, shifting his gaze between the door and the paper. He turned his gaze to Tokiya staggering away outside, hopefully towards his apartment.

“That’s eerie.” He said. The blonde looked at him for a couple of seconds before closing the paper. His fedora hung on the back of the chair, wet from the endless rain. Not to mention that it dripped on the floor, creating a small puddle.

“True that. It happened in the middle of the night. Everything inside was burned to a crisp but the rain stopped the fire before it could spread.” 

“Where?”

“The old Kurosaki household.”

“Kurosaki?” The name rung a few bells. “Why would anyone do that? Did anyone get hurt?”

“Nah. They don’t live there anymore either after they went bankrupt.” A dark, unfamiliar shadow crept over Syo’s face and he slightly clenched his fist, messing up the paper. There was a strong hint of bitterness in his voice; it was so rare to see him like that that Ittoki could tell from a mile away that something about that story seriously bothered him.

“Oh, I see. So, uh, how did the rest of the party go for you?”

“Well, I lost because Tomochika took your place but slipped on your vomit and Mikado didn’t want to deal with it anymore so he forfeited the match.  Then I watched you fighting and getting knocked into the ground when Ren McDouchebag neglected to do anything about it because he was busy arguing with his girlfriend. You know, the glamor girls, who gave us the stink eye when we arrived.”

Syo put the paper away and only then did he notice the cup on the table. He took some few sips before putting it down and looking straight at the redhead. Just then, Ittoki noticed the rings under his eyes. A dreadful feeling emerged in the pit of his stomach as Syo continued his tale.

“So I met up with an old friend of mine and eh…” he tilted his head from side to side. “It ended roughly.”

“You look terrible. I guess that’s a side effect?”

“Things are tough. But I’m getting through; nothing I can’t handle.” Syo’s smirk lacked confidence and simply put Ittoki had a hard time believing his words but he got the feeling that it was for the best if he refrained from nagging. It was also time for his shift to end anyways. 

* * *

The rest of the week, Ittoki had only one workday, leaving him with much time on his hands. Occasionally, he would meet up with Syo but he noticed that his friend was growing distant and he could not shake off the feeling that _something_ happened after the party. But it was rather obvious that it was an issue that Syo wanted to deal with on his own. The story about the fire entered the news on numerous occasions, courtesy of rumors and Tokiya’s radio on early mornings. Apparently, there was evidence that suggested that the fire had been set from the inside, rendering the incident to an actual crime.

“Things are getting really grim now. What if there is an arsonist on the loose?”

“Then whoever did it is a complete and utter fool. If they wanted to burn down the building, they should have waited until spring or summer. Trying to start a fire in a season where it rains all the time is dumb.” Tokiya fetched another tissue from the box on the small table to blow his nose. Despite his stuffed nose, he still spoke as calmly as always, albeit Ittoki would lie if he didn’t find it a bit entertaining.

“That’s calculated coming from you. Aren’t you worried?”

“…I’d be lying if I said no.”

An idea popped into Ittoki’s head as it hit him that he, despite their friendship, had yet to obtain Tokya’s number.

“So, just for the record, in case something happens, shouldn’t we exchange phone numbers?”

Ittoki covered himself with the blanket, shivering a bit. Along with the endless downpour, the temperature was down on single digits and with the broken heater in his bedroom, he felt like he was taking a nap on Antarctica. Luckily, his living room had a heater that was working and though, the cracks would steal a little of the heat, it was still somewhat good enough. Outside, the downpour raised hell.

“You’re getting paranoid. But why not?”

He handed his phone to Tokiya with a smile on his face when the device suddenly buzzed and Tomochika’s name flashed over the cracked screen. The redhead took back his phone with much disappointment to answer the call. It was odd for Tomochika to actually call as she would much rather be texting. Ittoki sensed an emergency courtesy of first world problems.

 “Hey Ikki! Are you home?” There was a lot of noise in the background, hence her shouting through the line.

“Yes. Why?”

“Good. Basically, Haruka and I were going out but the rain has caused a lot of chaotic bullshit and public transportation has been canceled due to overflooding. Can you believe it?”

“Sure. What’s the problem?”

“Do you mind that two drowned mice come and crash at your place for some time?”

“No, of course not. Where are you?”

“Right outside your door actually.”

The redhead rose from the couch with the blanket around him and headed for the door. Sure enough, there stood Tomochika and Haruka, drenched by the raging rain. Even though they were wearing heavy coats, it was no secret that the girls were shivering and soaked.

“Why were you outside in the first place? Didn’t you hear the weather reports?”

“Of course, we did.” Tomochika stepped inside and wrapped her coat for water. She did the same with Haruka’s jacket. “Tomochika insisted that we should go to the mall because there were sales in her favorite store.” Haruka said, moving past her friend.

“Still…” Ittoki wrapped the blanket around Haruka and he was pretty sure that he saw the girl blush. He followed them inside after making sure that his own clothes did not get wet from Tomochika sloppily hanging the wet jackets on the coat hanger.

“Oh. Hi Tokiya.” Tomochika took Ittoki’s place with Haruka neatly sitting on the edge of the couch. The two girls began to eagerly chat while Ittoki took the only space left; on the other side of Tokiya, who closed his eyes, looking ready to call it a day. He reached out for another tissue, sighing when he realized that the box was empty.

“You know, you can just steal my bed and rest if you need to.”

“No, I’m fine.”

The redhead patted him on the shoulder and headed towards the bathroom to get another box. Thank goodness, he had been shopping in advance, just in case Tokiya would drop by.

“Man, Tokiya. You look like shit.”

“You called me to pick up Ittoki in the middle of a rainstorm; you cannot possibly expect me to _not_ get ill.”

The two of them bickered back and forth while Ittoki tried to search through the mess of his bathroom for a pack of Kleenex. Even when the place neat and everything stood in order, it was still nowhere as immaculate as Tokiya’s.

“Is this what you’re after?” Haruka asked, holding a box in her hand. Like a ninja, she had managed to sneak up on him and find the missing box.

“Yes. Thank you, you’re a life saver.” He said while giving her a towel for her drenched hair. Exiting the bathroom, he had another one underneath his arm for Tomochika, who was busy glaring at an indifferent Tokiya. The bluenette was quick to grab another tissue, before he sneezed loudly, sniffling and coughing.

“That’s a nasty cold. Are you still working?” Haruka let the towel hang from her shoulders. Her hair was a mess but at least it was somewhat dry. Meanwhile, Tomochika, with a lot more hair than Haruka, wrapped the towel around her head. She was still clearly aggravated, rolling her eyes when Tokiya began to speak.

“I am. A mere cold isn’t enough to take me down.”

“But mycoplasma pneumonia is, Boxer.”

“How do you know that?” Haruka’s eyes widened with horror.

“She doesn’t.”

A tense silence lingered in the room and Tomochika looked ready to flip the table. She crossed her arms and shot another glare at Tokiya but it did not have the same kind of power as his death stare had. Haruka was getting uncomfortable and she looked pleadingly at Ittoki, begging him to do something.

“On a happier note, is anyone hungry? I don’t have much food but I got snacks.”

“I have to refuse since I got work to do.” Tokiya prepared to leave. He staggered to the entrance, sighing all the way. Without much coordination, he wandered out in the downpour, forgetting his jacket of all things. Worried, Ittoki headed outside, without shoes or jacket since Tokiya had yet to leave the open hallway.

“Ichi!” the bluenette stopped when he heard his name. He turned around, his gaze lacking focus.

“You forgot something.” Ittoki handed him the jacket, hoping that he would at least reconsider. But all hope was futile as Tokiya simply thanked him and continued his way towards wherever he was heading. Suddenly, Tomochika’s suggestion of pneumonia did not sound as implausible as it did and it worried the redhead greatly. However, nothing could compare when Tokiya suddenly stopped in his tracks, swaying slightly before collapsing. Right then and there. Ittoki’s heart jumped to his throat as a loud shriek escaped his lips and he almost leaped over to Tokiya’s side.

“Ittoki? What’s going on?” Tomochika and Haruka came running from the apartment, gasping loudly when they saw Tokiya on the ground. Haruka was quick to call the emergency line, explaining the situation. Frantic, Ittoki tried his best to get a hold of the situation but to little avail as evident by the incoming panic attack. Tokiya lay wide-eyed on the ground, snapping after air. In the distance, the sound of sirens rung through the city and Ittoki felt slightly better. An ambulance arrived in the parking lot and Haruka waved the paramedics over after they left the van with a stretcher. Once they reached the band of youths, they ordered Ittoki to step back so they could properly examine Tokiya.

“What’s happening to him?” Ittoki was hyperventilating, struggling to keep his shrill voice down.

“Stress. We must take him to the hospital to check for internal damage.“ One of the paramedics said, putting the bluenette on the stretcher. They carried him away in the rain, driving off as Ittoki stood completely heartbroken and defeated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Got a lot of drama in this chapter. From arson to Tokiya collapsing, oh my.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: HOMOPHOBIC LANGUAGE UP AHEAD.   
> Hope you enjoy this week’s chapter! There’s a little story at the end.

It had a long time since Ittoki entered a hospital. Approximately seven or so years ago, when his grandfather was going through a surgery. He remembered the awful smell of sickness and the fifty shades of white; senses that he would like to forget. He could not even begin to imagine himself being confined here. Which is why it worried him to no end when he ascended the staircase to the second floor. On his way, he met several families and loved ones, visiting with heavy hearts. Much like himself. It had been two days since Tokiya was hospitalized and during that time, the doctors and nurses had prohibited Ittoki from visiting because they were still running tests and constructing the best recovery for Tokiya.

The smell of disease was all round strong and lingered everywhere; even in the cafeteria. However, it was somewhat subdued thanks to the bouquet of white lilies. Walking down the broad hallway, he looked closely after the room which the receptionist had pointed out. He made a turn to the left and pushed the door open, his heart fluttering a bit when he saw Tokiya in the hospital bed. Next to him, stood a nurse, writing stuff down on a notepad. It was a large room with several curtains pulled over to hide other patients. Low whispering and silent mourning sent shivers down Ittoki’s spine.

“Hey.” He said lowly, entering with cautious steps. The nurse looked up from her pad and headed towards Ittoki. Her demeanor was professional of course but all around sweet.

“How’s he doing?” Ittoki asked, fearing the worst. His body was somewhat ready but his mind was absolutely not.

“His nervous system had a temporary breakdown due to stress. He’s recovering fast though but we’ll be keeping him for the next two weeks, just to be safe.”

“Ok, Thank you.” Ittoki nodded and hurried over to Tokiya’s bedside. The bluenette was eerily pale, almost blue but his eyes lighted up when he saw him, serving as the only true signs of life. When the nurse left, Ittoki sat down on the bed.

“You scared me. You really fucking scared me.” He kept his voice as low as possible when he really wanted to shout and scream.

“I apologize.”

“Don’t do that.” Ittoki wanted to say more but he found it impossible to say more without his voice cracking over. He fought the tears back but the effort soon proved to be futile. It hit him that he still carried the bouquet. Conveniently, there was an empty vase in the window and yet no other flowers. Ittoki placed his bouquet and filled the vase with water before putting it back in the window.

“I’m just glad you’re ok.” He turned around, nearing the bed again.

 _‘You don’t know what you have until it’s gone’_ was a bullshit statement. Ittoki knew exactly what he had. What he did not know was how much it meant for him. He wrote his feelings off as nothing more than a hopeless crush, ignoring the obvious fact that he was falling in love. The warm feeling that coursed through his veins had grown stronger; the private sessions that they had together no longer made him anxious to impress but instead made him happier than ever. He could no longer deny it.

“You’re the first one who has visited.”

“Wait, I am?”

Sure, Tokiya was a legal adult but did his family not visit? Even if they were on less than good terms, any reasonable family would visit one of their own if they ended up in the hospital.  Ittoki’s protective gene kicked in and he leaned over, hugging the bluenette tightly.

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“It’s fine.” Tokiya failed to conceal his surprised tone, flinching by the unexpected gesture. But he, albeit hesitantly, wrapped his arms around Ittoki.

“Are you crying?” Tokiya asked, stroking the red hair. Ittoki didn’t feel like answering; it was not like he could either as his throat went sore from the suppressed feelings. But now, his heart was torn open, beating and pulsating from pure emotion while pouring everything out.  The tears fell endlessly as he silently tightened the hug.

“Do I mean that much to you?”

“Of course, you do!” Ittoki said, his voice shrill. That was a complete understatement. There was so much that he wanted to say but no way could he ever voice them. His throat hurt too much for him to be speaking. Instead, he just pulled back, keeping his hands firmly planted on the bluenette’s shoulders. If he could not voice his endless thoughts, he could at least say the three magical words. But his desire was cut short when an uneven humming emerged from Tokiya. The humming eventually evolved into singing. Compared to that fateful day in the music room, his voice was hoarse and lacked the power like back then but nevertheless, Ittoki listened closely; savoring every word.

_Amazing grace, How sweet the sound_

_That saved a wretch like me._

_I once was lost, but now I am found,_

_Was blind, but now I see._

 “It just came to me.” Tokiya said, amazed at his own action. He turned to Ittoki and squinting his eyes. Just then, Ittoki felt something almost alien on his back; something warm that he needed and missed. The sun’s beams. Finally, the sun had decided to show its face and lighten up the room. How symbolic. Ittoki pulled away from Tokiya, parting his lips to utter the three words, which he always wanted to say.

“I love you-your singing.” Not exactly what he wanted to say and it garnered a perplexed glance from Tokiya.

“You what?”

“I love you.”

It came out of him, from the bottom of his heart; a result of his emotions overflooding and drowning all common sense. But it felt great. The relieving feeling that followed afterward was more soothing that he imagined it to be.

His cheeks flushed as he struggled to maintain eye contact. Now that he had finally gathered the courage to confess, he now grew anxious for Tokiya’s reaction. Ittoki absolutely feared the worst; it was all or nothing. He could leave the hospital floating on cloud nine or with a heart that had been nuked by a Fatman and blown to kingdom come. He could continue being in the friendzone or thrown completely out of that realm and be banished to the land of homophobic ridicule. Never had he thought so hard about his orientation as he did in this moment. It was an unspoken secret that he carried with him wherever he went. No one suspected him.

They did not ask. He did not have to tell. His mother did not even know either as he had been too afraid to tell her. He knew he was different from his friends when he noticed that his view on girls failed to correlate with the norm. He tried to watch porn with them but the sight of the female anatomy did nothing to him. And when that strange boy showed up around in the neighborhood during his last year of middle school and kissed him on the day that they met, he realized why he was different.

Tokiya was dumbfounded. His eyes grew wide and he sat up. Ittoki could not determine whether it was surprise or disgust. He desperately hoped for the former. After a series of uncomfortably awkward moments, he had to avert his gaze and admit defeat, still blushing, though. This slew of emotion that slowly began to brew soon felt like needles embedding his insides.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.” He slowly climbed away, fighting the tears that threatened to fall. He wanted to storm out of this stupid place and scream his heart out; punch a wall until his fist shattered; anything to get rid of this horrid pain. This was the stupidest thing, he had done to date. They had a perfectly healthy friendship but he just had to ruin it because he lacked any sense of self-control. He was an utter and complete fool.

“No, it’s not like that. It’s just… that I don’t really know what to say.“ Tokiya said, obviously uneasy. Of course, he was; some creepy faggot who just happened to be his neighbor confessed his feelings to him.    

“It’s ok if you can’t stand me now. I’m more or less used to it.” Ittoki resisted the urge to bash his own head against a wall. He stood, unable to directly face the bluenette and instead looked at the wall. The tears that he so desperately tried to hold back now overpowered him and they ran down his cheeks in endless streams. If he had any hopes of concealing his heartbreak, those hopes were shattered into pieces. He had lost, big time. He could say no more, so he made way to leave. But he had barely moved before a strong hand was wrapped around his wrist, pulling him back.

“Ittoki, that is not what I am saying, you fool!” Tokiya snapped at him with that hoarse voice of his. He coughed loudly, gasping for air before he spoke again. However, his usually stern tone wavered a bit and the uncertainty surfaced again as he let go of the redhead’s wrist.

“It’s because… I don’t know much about love and things connected with that.” his face went bright red as he said so and his scowling expression twisted into a flustered grimace. The redhead paused, sitting down on the bed while he wiped the tears away.

“You mean, you’ve never dated anyone?” he sniffled, feeling a little less knocked down. Tokiya turned away, his red ears serving as evidence of his embarrassment. He simply shook his head, coughing in the process. He then took a deep breath, speaking with a lower voice.

“I’m new… to all of this, ok?

“I… I didn’t mean to fall in love with you but I did. Over time, from the first day I met you, I was smitten.” The redhead began, opening his heart once more. To face the cold unknown was a terrifying thought and he felt himself wanting to clamp up. But as he spoke, he could no longer remain silent and the anxiety that once gripped him began to fade.

“I just thought that it was a silly crush and I left it at that but as times went on, I realized that it was something different. Something really, really different. I felt it growing every day; the thought of you warmed my heart like never before and when you ended up here, I was scared shitless because I thought that I was going to lose you for real. You mean everything to me. I know it sounds creepy and all but that the truth. I can’t explain it but I know what it is. Ichi, I love you.” Ittoki said with a shaky voice. He took the liberty of moving closer to Tokiya; still wary if he and his feelings were welcome. 

“I-I’ll say it as many times as you want to hear… that is if you want to hear them.” The tears started to build up in his eyes again and he rubbed them, cursing his apparent weakness. He hated the feeling of crying; he hated the fact that his heart seemed to be on his sleeve instead of inside his chest.

“…You can say it as often as you like. Now, don’t cry anymore; it doesn’t suit you.”

Before Ittoki could respond, a hand slipped behind his neck and pulled him closer. It felt like time itself stopped and the sensation of something warm pressed against his lips. It took him a while to process that he was being kissed. Perhaps, he would savor the moment some more if he kissed back from the beginning. The eager side of him emerged and he wrapped his arms around Tokiya, pulling him closer; relishing in the flavor of those lips he wanted to taste for so long. Tokiya’s whole body was very warm and Ittoki could not determine whether it was due to the fever, but his warm body felt nice; like a huggable heater.

“That… was my first.” Tokiya blushed and looked away. A triumph for Ittoki it was; being the very first. He could not help but smile brightly as he cupped the bluenette’s face and kissed him once more.

“So we are dating now?”

The bluenette failed to conceal his chummy smile but his red cheeks were evidence of his feelings. He refrained from answering right away but gave a nod, biting his lips. He placed his hand over Ittoki’s, giving it a slight squeeze. Outside, the sun had broken through the clouds and blessed this earth with its light.

* * *

 

When Ittoki returned home, he directly threw himself on the bed, belly first. He wondered whether he should try to move and get some food because his stomach was howling out of hunger. But he simply did not feel like it. His body was drained of energy. And even still, he was floating on cloud nine. Even if he was completely exhausted, every fiber of his body pulsated with life.

At last, he decided to go down to the ROULETTE and buy some food. When he arrived at the café, he noticed how lively everything was. Maybe it was because he felt high on emotions. Carefree and happy without end, he opened the door.

“Ittoki!” A familiar voice greeted him.

It was Haruka; wearing the server’s uniform. She carried a tray of four lattés. Her knuckles were white as chalk since she had such a tight grip on the tray. It was surprising to say the least as Ittoki could only stare at her wide-eyed. She excused herself and hurried over to another table where a group of girls sat; the same girls from Ren’s party. They sat huddled together, looking an awfully lot like the female version of a stereotypical Italian mob, complete with their fur coats and lack of bright colors. Something about their demeanor agitated Ittoki and he made sure to garner as little attention from them as possible while heading to the counter. The thing was that all the food and cakes would be put on display here for those, who was on the go while everyone else had the servers give it to them. Ittoki had no intention of staying here; he was to go home, write some lyrics and maybe study. But first, he needed some curry. While searching intensely, he was caught by surprise when a stranger’s voice suddenly said;

“Hello. Can I help you?”

The redhead looked up and was greeted by an unfamiliar face. A blond guy with green eyes hidden behind glasses smiled at him. He was a giant; towering over Ittoki, who managed to note that the uniform was a size too small.  So Haruka and whoever this was, were his new coworkers.

“Uh, I’m just looking for some curry.”

“Righty~!” The blonde grabbed a package somewhere in the far end of the counter and handed it to Ittoki. Sure enough, it was curry.  Happy, Ittoki paid for his dinner and left the café. To say this had been a good day, would be an understatement.  The weather had luckily decided to remain unchanged so Ittoki took a stroll around in the park. He sat down on a bench and grabbed his phone to call his mother. It had been some time since they last talked; for real that was as they would just text each other. It was quick and efficient but there were times where he missed the voice of his mother.

“Hi mom.”

“Hi. So, glad that you called. How’re you doing, sweetheart?”

“Eehehe. Just fine.”

“That’s good to hear. You know, it really warms my heart to know that my little boy is doing ok. And got an education to boot.”

“Sure enough. But, uhm…”

“Oh? Is something wrong?”

Ittoki wondered whether or not he should tell her right away. His mother had always been accepting of what he did in his life but the anxiety of showing his true self to others nearly paralyzed him every time, he thought of telling others the truth. When he said that he was more or less used to it, it meant that he had been witness to a lot of bigotry in his social circle over the years. Everyone used “gay” and “faggot” as insults and they expected him to do the same but how could he when he literally was these things? The redhead took a deep breath and despite, wanting to spill the beans, he decided against it. It was not time yet. Besides, his mother should meet Tokiya before she knew the truth.

“Nope~! Everything couldn’t be better.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah! Finally got them together, man! Sooner or later, we had to make that happen without cockblocking and whatnot. And that means that we can to the real juicy stuff; the cherry bits that you, my fateful readers have been waiting for; the reason why I rated this Explicit XD. Now onwards so more serious matters.  
> So I have a brother. Three of them actually but this is about the oldest, who also happens to be my foster brother. Anyhoo, he had this insane girlfriend who tore him down physically and emotionally and a busy job at a mental institution. One day, when things were at their worst, he and I were walking together in the park and chatting up when he got a call and his boss asked him to come to work. So it happened that my bro suddenly could not move. His body literally shut down right then and there and he was hospitalized for three weeks, due to depression and stress. I don’t think I’ve been so scared in my life. Thankfully my protective bear genes kicked in and I called the emergency line. For the record, it’s called 112 in Denmark. To sum everything up, he went to have therapy sessions with a priest while we tried to make his insufferable bitch of then ex-girlfriend leave him alone so that something like that wouldn’t happen again. Today, he is doing just great, albeit he is unemployed at the moment and is getting married with a kind, supportive girl who treats him well. And the bitchfriend? I kid you not; she became a prostitute.   
> So that’s my inspiration for this chapter.


	11. Chapter 11

The weather was sunny outside when he entered the hospital. Ittoki had been visiting every day so he knew his way to his beloved’s room. When he opened the door, he saw the nurse relaying some info to Tokiya before Ittoki garnered her attention and she waved him over.

“I have some good news. Ichinose, you’re recovering much faster than we expected and I believe that you can leave by the end of next week. That is, if everything unfolds as we have predicted.” She shifted her gaze between her notepad and the two boys before her before eventually leaving.

“That’s good to hear.” The redhead sat on the bed and reached for his lover’s hand. “So don’t work too hard from now on, ok?” he squeezed the bluenette’s hand, leaning closer to him. Had they been at home, Ittoki would have jumped him right then and there; kissing him all over and do what else he could get away with. But all of these lewd thoughts would have to wait, thus they emerged into a simple kiss on the forehead. Ittoki’s heart fluttered a bit when he saw the bluenette blush and turn away.

“I like it when you’re embarrassed.”

“What are you, a sadist?”

“Heheh, don’t be like that, Ichi.”

“Ichinose! Glad to see that you’re somewhat all right.” A complete stranger said, clapping once loudly. He was neatly dressed in a white suit with an umbrella dangling from his arm. His hair was neatly slicked back with few strains covering his forehead. His wide smile brightened with the sight of Ittoki as he neared the pair. He looked obnoxiously stereotypical and cunning, complete with shades stuck in his breast pocket. Soon he stood directly at the bedside, sticking his hands into his pockets.

“What are you doing here?” the bluenette frowned at the suited man, who remained indifferent to the less-than-enthusiastic reaction. Instead the stranger shrugged his shoulders, still smiling.

“Why, I’m here to visit you of course. Although it appears that I came in second.” And then he lay eyes on Ittoki. Or rather, analyzing him. Yet his demeanor was overfriendly albeit hinting at something more callous. It made Ittoki unnerved as he sat up, discreetly moving his hand away.

“Hi there. Ichinose’s… coworker here. You can call me Satou.” The stranger reached his hand and Ittoki reluctantly took it. He felt like his hand was getting crushed. He took a quick glance at Tokiya before introducing himself.

“Otoya Ittoki. Toki-Ichinose’s friend”

“Hmm. You sound familiar. Say, aren’t you the one who makes those guitar covers online?”

“Uhm yes?”

“You have talent. I might know someone who can get you some publicity.” Satou reached for his pocket and reached out a small business card, which he gave to Ittoki. There was some golden text on the card and it read; Raging Entertainment, complete with a phone number. Ittoki looked at Satou, nodding slightly before putting the card in his pocket.

“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’d like to have a moment with Tokiya. About business and stuff.”

The redhead shrugged a bit as he looked at his lover. Tokiya’s face twisted into an apologetic frown but he remained silent as Ittoki left and closed the door behind him. And suddenly, for the first time, he grew agonizingly curious to what Tokiya’s job actually was. Then again, it had never occurred the redhead to even ask about it, let alone give an opportunity for Tokiya mention it in passing, It involved a laptop and that was about it. There had to be something more to it.

He sat down on a lonesome chair in the hallway, watching other patients wander back and forth. They looked so emaciated in their white hospital gowns, pale skin and with the white walls among them. The redhead shrugged, hoping the deities would never put him in such a place. He would be pacing around with no purpose, waiting for his life to pick up its meaning again.

After fifteen minutes had passed, Satou left the room and headed towards the redhead. Contrasting his smile when they first met, he now scowled deeply as he locked eyes with Ittoki.

“Have a nice day.” He said with the coldest tone known to man and left as quickly as he could, storming his way down the hallway. Ittoki barely had any time to respond, let alone process the callousness in Satou’s approach. He sat and blinked for a while and he wondered how Tokiya was doing. Cautious, the redhead opened the door and quickly made way to his lover. His heart fluttered a bit when he saw the bluenette smirking with confidence. How he wished, he could be a fly on the wall during that short time.

“Did he say anything to you?” the bluenette asked.

“Not much other than wishing me a good day.” Ittoki said and down on the bed, just noticing now that a chair stood on the other side. But he would rather be sitting next to Tokiya.

“Do you wish to debut?”

“I haven’t thought of it; not since that day in the music room where you advised me against it. But I like the idea of more people listening to my music.” And then it hit him; the message that he received one day. Ittoki reached for his cellphone and showed Tokiya the message. It took a while for him to read it before he returned the phone with a satisfied smile on his lips.

“You’re doing fine. Don’t ever change what you do. Your music touches the hearts of many and… I like it that way.”

Ittoki couldn’t contain the chummy smile that crept over his face and he leaned down to leave a kiss-

Suddenly, the door flew open, startling some of the other visitors as Tomochika and Haruka entered the room; the former receiving some deadly glares. Her heels made a terrible noise, every time they made inpact with the floor and it echoed through the hospital room.

“Ittoki! Tokiya! How’s my boys doing?” Tomochika grabbed the handle of the bed and invaded Tokiya’s personal space whereas Haruka was more subdued, sitting down on that one chair. She smiled quietly at the events unfolding before her, eventually putting the roses which she carried in the window. Besides them, the only other bouquet was Ittoki’s, which he refreshed every now and then as flowers here were ephemeral. She had brought red roses, which heavily contrasted against the white lilies. Moreover, there were still no signs of Tokiya’s family but it appeared that the bluenette cared little for that.

“So what have you learned, young man?” Tomochika raised a finger at Tokiya who simply shook his head, turning away from her. A sly smirk appeared on his lips as he turned to face her again.

“That you are not my mother.” He deadpanned and Tomochika had to admit defeat and so she did by throwing her arms in the air and returning to Haruka’s side.

“Touchy.”

Gentle chuckled emerged from Haruka as she covered her mouth to contain the laughter.

“You mean touché.” She finally said after the laughter died down. Tomochika blinked for a couple of moments before she merely shook her head. Ittoki had been quiet for most of the time. He wondered when and how he should tell them. And what would their reaction be? Right now, their friendship was running smoothly but it did not exclude the chances of everything falling to pieces and Ittoki did not want that. He watched Tomochika banter with Tokiya once more as Haruka closed in on him.

“Hi. You’re awfully quiet. Are you ok?”

“Oh? Uhm, I’m just… I’m enjoying myself. That’s all.”

Haruka asked no further questions and instead averted her gaze towards Tomochika growing aggravated at Tokiya, who shut all her smart remarks down with precise cleverness.

“You know… the friendship that- no, nevermind.” Haruka shook her head, smiling at Ittoki. “I’m happy that he is all right.” Behind her smile, however was a strong hint of something more melancholic. If Haruka tried to hide something, she was not every good at it. Ittoki got worried and he wondered what had upset her.

* * *

The week after, Tokiya was finally released from the hospital but he was given strict instructions to work less and take an obligatory break every now and then. Also, he was asked to get at least 8 hours of sleep every day. Tokiya was not pleased with that but a stern glare from the nurse quickly got him to comply. The clouds pulled over the sky and the weather was left rather ambiguous when the two youths left the hospital. On their way home, an hour-long bus ride awaited them but it did not feel like that; rather Ittoki felt like time passed by quickly; perhaps it was because he had fallen in love. He looked briefly at Tokiya, who had fallen asleep, resting his head against the window. Words could not describe how much Ittoki wanted to kiss him and savor in the absolute beauty that was Tokiya. But for now, he just titled himself as a very lucky and happy person before he rested his head against the bluenette’s shoulder, entwining his fingers between his.

The clouds still hovered above the town like hawks when they returned home and by the time, that happened it was early afternoon and Ittoki had decided to crash in Tokiya’s apartment. Someone had to make sure that he followed the instructions of the doctors. A chilling feeling hit Ittoki’s feet as he stepped into the apartment. It was still shiny and clean, given that no one had been here for two weeks but it felt so empty and lifeless now. The redhead grabbed his lover’s bag and headed to the bedroom, without any idea of where to put it and its contents. Inside it were clothes and a piece of paper. Before he could inspect any further, Tokiya had entered the bedroom to make sure that everything was in order.

He neatly folded the same outfit, he wore on the day that he collapsed and put it in a bucket that stood behind the door; presumably, his laundry bucket. In the meantime, Ittoki fetched the folded piece of paper that was left on the bed but chose to simply hold it. Perhaps it was a letter to Tokiya’s parents, about what a bunch of assholes they were for not paying a visit to their own son when he was hospitalized. Not even his own brother cared enough to do that. What in the world had happened for things to end like this?

Ittoki must had looked really upset because before he really knew it, he was tightly embraced in the dim light of the bedroom. He could feel his anger slowly slipping away and he cooled down, wondering what triggered such a gesture.

“It-it makes me mad though. About your family, I mean.”

“Things have been like that for a long time. That’s how things go but why do you get so upset on my behalf?”

“It saddens me. I mean, here I am with no blood parents of my own but I was adopted into a family that treated me like their own and I love them wholeheartedly. There is not anything in this world that could make change that, even if I sometimes think about my real family. It can’t really be helped.” Ittoki squeezed harder, burying his face in the crook of his lover’s neck. It was not tears he was hiding but rather a seething anger that would not leave him be. That people could be so selfish infuriated him to end.

“I was lucky. But you, when you have your blood-family and when they don’t even seem to care about you.”

“Otoya.” Tokiya pulled back, his eyes starring directly into Ittoki’s with a strong hint of seriousness. “Don’t worry about me or them. I got… I got you after all.” This took him some courage to say as he quickly turned away to hid his crimson cheeks. But his affection was more than genuine and it was all that mattered.

“Now, should we get something to eat?”

The pair exited the bedroom and headed towards the kitchen. Looking through the fridge, it became apparent that there was nothing worth eating, aside for many smoothies, seemingly homemade. There was just enough food to feed one person. Tokiya closed it and sighed deeply, crossing his arms as he looked at Ittoki. In that moment, a loud growl emerged from the redhead’s stomach and he soon felt dizzy from lack of food.

“How unfortunate.” He shrugged his shoulders. “And it would take eons to heat something up from the freezer.”

“How about we go for pizza?” Ittoki said, remembering that one pizza place, Syo had taken him once. He had not been there for a while now, considering he didn’t have the time or money to get a Meat Lover. But in spite of that, he felt like spoiling himself. So for the heck of it, he could live with having oatmeal for dinner a few more times. However, he did not expect that his suggestion had caused the horrified expression on Tokiya’s face.

“They got vegetarian pizzas too.” Ittoki said, flashing an unsure smile. However, it did little as the bluenette before him frowned.

“I’m not a vegetarian. I just don’t like fat food but you can order some if you want.” The comment took Ittoki aback but that did explain the low-fat pancakes although Tokiya was the last person who needed to lose weight. On the contrary, his stay at the hospital had made him loose quite a bit of weight and a few pounds could do him good.

“Uhm… they got salad too.” He said, trying to remember the flyer that lay somewhere in his apartment. He had no idea of it was even valid anymore as Syo once said that they tended to switch out the most unpopular options. Given the fact that it was a pizzeria, people rarely went there for salad.

“…I’d rather have a salad pizza.” Tokiya said after some thought and it made Ittoki very happy.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry that it took this long for an update. I’ve been so busy with school and life in general that I barely got time to write and now that I have, my laptop decides to kill its wi-fi system so I can’t even post. Ugh!   
> Anyhoo, finally I get my internet working so I can post again. And get writing. Thank you all for the comments and kudos, it really means a lot <3.

By evening, he had already invaded the king-sized bed, completely covering himself with the thick, warm duvet. The soft fabric caressed his skin, soft like feathers. Compared to the way he lived, this was a luxury. A luxurious addition to a new, glorious beginning of his life.

In the next room, the shower had just been shut off and Tokiya likely prepared himself. Just like his own rat’s nest of an apartment, the walls here were paper-thin, allowing even the smallest of sounds slip through. Initially, Ittoki thought that Tokiya and everyone else, who lived here had been better off, now that he actually saw the place, but now he knew that it was a matter of cleaning ambitions and nothing more. Not to mention money as evident by the man expensive-looking furniture and decorations. Considering how much work Tokiya did, it was not much of a surprise. 

The bedroom door creaked open and Tokiya stepped in, wearing a gray t-shirt and a pair of boxers. His wet hair left small droplets on his shoulders and his bangs almost covered his eyes. He looked like one of those dogs with too much fur for their own good. He had to swipe it away numerous times to see properly. From a certain angle, he looked very much like HAYATO; rather, completely just like him. The resemblance was eerily uncanny. He sat on the bed, his back flashing the redhead.

“You must be really tired.” Tokiya climbed underneath the duvet, facing Ittoki when he lay down.  The faint scent of the shampoo hit Ittoki’s nostrils and the redhead crawled a little closer. He shook his head and tried to hide the wide smile. He was most excited; lying in bed with the love of his life was like a dream come true. He moved closer to him, planting a kiss on the bluenette’s forehead before taking his lips. Growing bold, he climbed on top of Tokiya, still tasting his lips.

“You have me now. I’ll be your family.” Ittoki pushed their foreheads together, placing his arms to surround the bluenette’s face. He shrugged a little when Tokiya wrapped his arms around him, remaining silent at first. But it was no surprise that he did not expect such a proposal but there was a little hint of happiness and it warmed Ittoki’s heart. For all the crap that Tokiya had been through, he deserved some fortune returned to him.

“I love you.” Ittoki smiled. _Action spoke louder than words_ and he had concluded that Tokiya abode by that saying as evident by his lack of reply. Instead, he pulled the redhead closer and they lay there in silence, enjoying the presence of each other. After a while, Ittoki wondered if he should take their relationship to the next stage. His lewd thoughts had been subdued since the incident but now, they began to haunt him once more. But what if Tokiya had no interest in such things?

Silent, he shuddered a bit, looking at Tokiya. He wondered what he should do next; simply ask the question or go on without any sort of clarification? Fearing the worst, he kissed Tokiya once more but this time more passionate; his tongue taking the liberty of entering the space between his lover’s lips. Of course, Tokiya was bewildered at first, shrugging noticeably. His eyes grew wide with what looked to be terror… but he did not object one bit. He pulled his tongue back at first but soon dared

“Sorry. I just wanted to try.” Ittoki climbed to his side of the bed. Maybe he was progressing too fast; Tokiya had just gotten home and was probably tired beyond wording. He deserved to have a good night’s sleep. Ittoki crept under the duvet, trying to catch the various sounds that came next to him. Tokiya had said nothing at first but he crept closer, so close that his hot breath tingled the redhead’s skin. 

“It was nice though. Just… warn me next time.” The bluenette closed his eyes, falling asleep after mere moments. His nose was still stuffed from the cold, making his breathing heavy as he had to breathe through his mouth. They lay very close to each other since Tokiya had invaded Ittoki’s side of the bed. But the space that the redhead had was bigger than what he was already used to so he did not feel like complaining. 

* * *

By early morning, Ittoki woke up. He rose from the bed, yawning and stretching his body before looking over at Tokiya, who had returned to his own side of the bed. His entire body was covered by the duvet as he slept soundly and Ittoki tried his best to silently maneuver his way out of the bedroom. In the living room, the clock had just passed 6:30 and Ittoki couldn’t sleep anymore so he decided to get up. He could really use a bath but chances were that Tokiya would suffer a heart attack if there came any disruptions in his system. Besides, Ittoki lived just next door so he could just pay himself a quick visit and get a towel.

The weather was cool outside although everything was dry. Supposedly, it could have something to do with the fact that he wore nothing but a pair of pants. His quest was over and done quickly and he returned to Tokiya’s bathroom, anticipating a hot bath. Once in the bathroom, he began to strip himself of what little clothing that he wore. The heater, however, was on so it did not feel cold in the slightest.

He was just about to step into the shower when suddenly the door opened and Tokiya stepped in. The atmosphere got awkward, fast as no one bothered to say anything. Ittoki felt his cheeks growing red, considering that Tokiya’s eyes rested on his groin, with his signature cold expression. Even still, he couldn’t help but to feel more aroused by the moment. He shrugged as he felt the blood coursing through his veins and all the way down to…

“Please don’t stare at me like that. It’s kinda embarrassing.”  The redhead laughed nervously, pushing his legs together although it did very little to hide anything. He backed into the shower and pulled the curtain. The water poured down over him, cooling him down. It was quiet outside, so Ittoki thought that Tokiya had done his business and left. In a way, he felt somewhat conflicted about it. Last night, he thought about sex and God knew what other lewd things entered his mind. He wanted more and he still wanted to.

“Ittoki. I’m coming in.” Tokiya suddenly said out of nowhere.

“What? Wait, why?!” the redhead protested but his concerns were cut short when Tokiya pulled the curtain away and entered the shower cabin, stark naked. Despite everything, he was still breathtakingly gorgeous. The shower cabin was not made for two people and thus, the tiny space felt like a cramped cage. The water hit Tokiya’s face, making his blue bangs stick to his forehead. They obscured his eyes completely so he had to slick his hair back to see. His other hand was used to cover himself up.

“Why though?” Ittoki tried not to stare and it made the bluenette unnerved as he turned away, his face descending into a deep crimson. He suddenly shut off the water, likely to keep water bills at a minimum.

“Because of yesterday. I’m not a psychologist but I can read people and I know that you thought of…it.”

“Well you don’t have to force yourself for my sake. These things are about, you know, they should go down when everyone feels like it.”

The redhead prepared to leave, trying to smile but it only came out as a grimace. He looked around for an opening that felt somewhat natural since Tokiya stood right in the middle of his path. Bathing with Tokiya was nice enough although, now awkward due to the conversation that they just had. Of course, he wanted to become one with his lover but not when the other half was not comfortable. He wanted Tokiya to feel good too…

“You asked me to not stare at you and yet you’re doing the exact same thing.”

“Whoops. Shit, sorry.”

“Ittoki. It’s all right. I don’t mind.” Tokiya closed the space between them, cupping the redhead’s face before kissing him. He had been taking some notes as his tongue slid between Ittoki’s lips. Ittoki could not deny his arousal any longer. He wrapped his arms around the bluenette’s neck and kissed him deeply, savoring the taste of his tongue. Tokiya planted his hands beside Ittoki, pressing him against the wall. It was too much. Too good. The redhead felt his member stiffening, coming closer to climax. With the way that their bodies were positioned, it was inevitable that Tokiya would notice a cock poking his tights.

“You…” he pulled back, wide-eyed. He stood for a while, deep in thought before he reached down and grabbed the erect member. The feeling was electrifying; the smooth strokes sent shivers down Ittoki’s spine as a longing whimper escaped his throat. He clenched his eyelids shut, his desire growing stronger with every passing second. He heard his own cries of passion, they were high pitched small moans of pleasure. 

“The sounds that you make are so lewd.” Tokiya let his hand slide up and down around Ittoki’s hard member, his eyes wide with morbid fascination. He tightened his grip a little more, stroking faster. He watched every lewd expression that came across Ittoki’s face, jittering a little when the redhead came close to coming.

“Don’t say that! Ah! You-you’re such a pervert…” The redhead whimpered, shuddering with desire. He breathed deeply, pondering if he should finish himself off right now as all he could think of was Tokiya touching him some more

“This is impractical. Maybe we should continue elsewhere.” Tokiya said with a faint smirk that almost bordered on the devious. He quickly stepped out of the bath but stopped when he lay eyes on the towel that Ittoki had brought. Compared to arguably everything in here, the towel was of lower quality and ugly in color; a dull green. Therefore, it surprised Ittoki when he saw Tokiya grab the towel and use it.

“I take it that this is yours?”

“Uh, yes but why use it?”

“…I don’t know. I guess it looked cozy.” The bluenette wrapped himself up before heading to a drawer next to the sink. Inside it were towels; thick, soft ones. They looked like fur coats with their glossy silky material. Tokiya tossed one towards Ittoki, who frantically grabbed the towel.

* * *

Having been the one, who stood helpless against his arousal, Ittoki now took full control, once the couple entered the living room. He sat Tokiya down, climbing on top of him as he captured his lips lustfully, entwining their tongues once more. He pulled back after some time, leaving a string of salvia, water drops and hot breaths.

The issue of roles was not much of a problem; rather it just naturally fell into place. Pulling bac to catch his breath, Ittoki saw that Tokiya’s face was bright red and his expression bewildered, yet his hands moved steadily towards Ittoki’s behind, caressing his buttocks through the fabric of the towel.

“Ichi, are you a virgin?” Ittoki breathed out, whimpering when Tokiya’s hand reluctantly slipped underneath the towel. He pulled the bluenette into a hug, moaning lowly. Underneath his tight embrace, he felt Tokiya moving his head in a nod, which only made the redhead giggle a bit.

“Me too…” he admitted, lewd noises escaping his throat as his buttocks was squeezed hard. His cock throbbed underneath the towel and he was dangerously close to climax. Unable to wait any longer, he slipped a hand underneath and rubbed himself off, the precum leaking from his tip. His voice was raspy as he moaned louder. There was a wonderful swirling in his stomach, one he had never experienced before.

“Could we…?”

“Uh, I don’t know. I don’t have protection laying around.”

“Oh.” Was the only response, Ittoki could give as he wiped some saliva off his lip and climbed down. He looked away when he saw the white stain on Tokiya’s towel. The bluenette’s face was still red as could be and his eyes grew wide.

“Sorry ‘bout that.” Ittoki had to look away in shame as he covered his crimson face. Sure, to finally be released was an absolute pleasure but he’d be damned if he did not feel ashamed otherwise.

“It’s all right. It can be washed away.” Tokiya’s voice was off-tune. He stood for a couple of brief moments and gawked at his hand before he headed towards the bedroom, probably to get a set of clothes. He left the bedroom with two sets in hand, one of which was Ittoki’s.

* * *

Whatever had happened in the morning was completely forgotten now as it would seem. Any awkwardness that may have been, was now gone and Ittoki was content with that fact. The clock had just passed 7 am as the couple ate breakfast; leftovers from yesterday. Sitting across the table, Ittoki watched Tokiya writing a note of notice for himself; perhaps to buy groceries.

“Are you going to work today?” The redhead asked,

“Yes.” Tokiya posted the note on his fridge. It was just one out of many, many notes. “Albeit moderately.”

There was a feeling of relief inside Ittoki as he smiled faintly and continued eating his breakfast. He had hoped for a “no” but as long as Tokiya kept an eye on his health, nothing else really mattered. Ittoki could not begin to process the thought of losing him. His world would end if Tokiya was gone, plain and simple.

“Be careful. Promise me that.” The redhead got up and pulled Tokiya into a tight hug, wishing that he could never let go. He buried his face in the crook of Tokiya’s neck, tightening the hug a little more. If only they could stay like this forever.

“I will.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sooooo sorry that I kept on cockblocking in this chapter. But I wanted to put the lemon on the cake when things felt natural.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaah, so sorry. I had some brutal PC problems that left me unable to write for almost two months.   
> I hope I can make it up for you all with this chapter.   
> Please enjoy~

Conveniently, Ittoki had forgotten that it was soon time for the first written finals. It was a nagging thought that he managed to forget about after everything that had happened. Like a small rainy cloud on one’s wedding day. However, he tried to keep his head held high, obvious to the growing negativity around him. People were pissed of course but what did they expect when they entered? To slack around? This was not high school anymore, where you could color yourself entirely black and blend into the background where no one paid attention to you. University, as Ittoki had come to learn during his first term, demanded more; there were no places to hide and no forgiveness to skipping. Luckily, he did none of these things during high school. He was no honor student, but his grades weren’t garbage either.

Ringo stood and pointed at the blackboard and explained all the formalities, saying multiple times that he cared little for it as well as explaining why the finals were set in a weekend. Essentially, it just boiled down to this being a half-course, obligatory building rocks for future courses.

“It’s because Headmaster Saotome hates us.” Shibuya mumbled, frowning. She rested her head in her hands, staring at nothing as it seemed that her attention was garnered somewhere else.

Ittoki took a quick glance at his classmates; there was a feeling of anxiety in the room and he could tell by their faces that their stress levels were already rising, including his own. He only felt more exhausted by the second, knowing that his weekend would be dedicated to that wretched assignment. And sleep would have to leave.

This was their only course today so everyone could go home and get their emotional breakdowns done within the 5 hours that were between now and when the final exam would be revealed to the scared public.

“Good luck, everyone. I believe in y’all~!” Ringo clapped his hands, smiling brightly. Somehow, Ittoki got the feeling that his effeminate teacher relished in the students’ misery or perhaps it was his rare bouts of pessimism speaking. Regardless he, along with everyone else, replied with a dry “thank you.”.

“If my body is found in the morning, you know why? Tell Haruka that I gave my job to her.”

“She already has a job. At the ROULETTE.”

“Yeah, she told me. She’s a bit put off by that new guy who came around the same time as her. He keeps comparing her to a dog named Elizabeth or something.” Tomochika said distantly, texting someone on her phone. Ittoki thought a bit about then and suddenly remembered the towering blonde, he had met one day.

The following hours, Ittoki bought dinner for the entire weekend along with soda and snacks to keep himself up and going, since sleep wasn’t going to happen for the next 48 hours. He was getting tired, simply by the thought. Ittoki gathered all his groceries and barricaded himself in the bedroom. He made sure that the heater was on as he turned his laptop on and gathered his Bible-sized book that he paid a little too much for. Soon, he had prepared his very own working-slumber bunker, surrounded by soda and potato chips.

A soft knock on his door brought him out of his thoughts and he went to see who it was. Hopefully not his boss with a new change in shifts. He had fought a war to make himself free for this weekend. Fearing the worst, he took a deep breath and opened the door.

Someone above had likely heard him as Tokiya, his holy angel of mercy, stood before him. He wore his reading gasses, making his eyes more prominent. He held a book under his arm, the same one as Ittoki’s.

“Ichi!” Ittoki exclaimed with joy, resisting the urge to hug him.

“I take it that you’re waiting for your finals too. Good luck.” There was a small hint of a smirk on his lips.

* * *

By Sunday, Ittoki was a wreck. He had already gotten traces of black circles under his eyes. He handed in the assignment early but his mind was mush. His body was like a boiled carrot, limp and dull to the touch. Not even the fresh air of a Sunday afternoon could bring him any sort of energy.

What he needed was sleep.

Satou, of all people, stood and gawked at him. He was wearing a black suit, looking like a Special Services agent. Rightfully, he wore his sunglasses, pulled them down a bit to look at Ittoki.

“Otoya? Good to see you. Do you know if Ichinose is home?” he asked in a carefree tune, even if her face was locked in an unsettling scowl. His eyes were a striking amber, like that of a snake. There was a certain coldness to them but Ittoki was too exhausted to pay any attention to it.

“I think he is… I don’t really know.” He yawned, dragging his feet to the door. His hand was inches away from knocking when the door suddenly went open and Tokiya stepped out, looking fresher than ever. The bluenette simply shook his head when he saw Ittoki’s current state.

“Ichi…” the redhead whimpered, rubbing his eyes when Tokiya was about to scold him for neglecting his sleep. But he froze in place and when he lay eyes on Satou, who simply watched with a sly smirk on his lips. He frowned, his lips forming a thin line.

“Satou.” He said with apathy.

“What’ve you been up to lately?”

“My mid-terms.”

Ittoki grew curious to the animosity that was between them. He understood the fact that Tokiya was less than fond at Satou. Vice versa it was more ambiguous. Initially when they had all met in the hospital, Ittoki had just written it off as co-worker rivalry or something innocent but now, he felt absolutely zero wit; just a strong feeling of loathing.

“HAYATO has been asking for you.”

“Can we talk privately.”

 _No_ , was what Ittoki initially wanted to say but he got the feeling that more serious matters were at stake, given the fact that HAYATO of all people was mentioned. He silently nodded, shooting a quick glance towards Tokiya before he staggered back to his apartment.

He threw himself in the couch, sighing and praising himself for surviving. He truly deserved some sleep now, or rather needed it. Ittoki was about to make way for his bedroom when a devious thought entered his mind and he headed towards the wall between here and Tokiya’s living room. What he thought of doing was immoral; completely sinful and besides, he should be sleeping instead. But a grotesque curiosity prevented him from fully letting go and keep his nose out of business that did not involve him. He leaned closer to the wall.

“Tonight?” Tokiya was more surprised than hostile. “I thought it was next week?”

“Plans have changed, thanks to Seira.” Satou spoke with the full extent of his callousness. He was furthest away, making him the hardest to hear.

Who was Seira? A sinking feeling emerged in the pit of Ittoki’s stomach and he feared the worst. It was the same gut-wrenching feeling that haunted him when he had first met Haruka.

“She has some…issues that she wants to take care of. Her own way. If I understood her thought process, then I’d explain some more but I can’t. It’s tonight and that’s all there is to it. I got your outfit so you should get ready.”

There was a haunting silence next door until a door was suddenly slammed shut. Then came a low, incoherent grumble from the room.

“You know, you should give the kid a chance to shine.” Satou was in the kitchen. “Have you listened to his covers? He got some talent and it’d be a waste if he didn’t get a chance to utilize it. Don’t you think?” It did not really come as a surprise that they were talking about Ittoki.

“No.” Tokiya said from the bedroom. He seemed to be struggling with something, cursing under his breath several times, though it was too low for Ittoki to determine what he was saying.

“Tokiya, just because you had a few bumps, doesn’t mean he will.” Satou sighed, sounding like his patience was running thin.

“Still I don’t you anywhere near him.”

Satou let out a sly chuckle. “Is it because you love him?”

There was another eerie silence before the door flew open as evident by it hitting the wall. The possibility of a fight breaking out suddenly became plausible to Ittoki and he prepared himself to jump in and break up the scuffle if needed.

“Let’s get this over with.” Tokiya ignored the question and it left Ittoki a little disappointed. Sure, there was no doubt that the feelings for each other were sincere but it did not detour the redhead from feeling better if Tokiya had acknowledged it.

“You do realize that you gotta tell him sooner or later.”

No response from Tokiya, just a chilling silence that conveyed nothing, not even a hint of his thoughts. Instead he simply closed the bedroom door. The two of them exited the apartment soon after while Ittoki sat motionless. For a while, he stared at nothing, a million thoughts occupying his mind. Forget the fact that Tokiya went away to work again; who was Seira and what was it that Ittoki deserved to know?

A soft knock brought Ittoki out of his trance and he headed towards it see who no wanted his attention. It turned out to be Haruka, herself. There was a hint of guilt across her face as she let herself in. Instead of putting her coat on the coat hanger, she simply held it over her arm, implying that she did not intend to stay here for long.

“I, uh, just wanted to say hi… and give you this.” She handed Ittoki a piece of paper. It was a plan of shifts for the employees. Ittoki was set to work this night. An awful taste emerged in his mouth and he resisted the urge to rip the paper to shreds. He was tired, confused and increasingly grumpy; the last thing, he wanted to do was work.

Regardless, he followed Haruka down to the café, his mood souring the closer he got.

* * *

There was a terribly lot of traffic and buzz in the café when Ittoki got to work. Most of it came from young women and there were _many_ of them, making today the busiest in a long time. Apparently, they were circling around the radio where Tomochika’s voice could be heard while others were fully occupied by their laptops. 

Natsuki was there as well and he gave a friendly wave when he saw the redhead. Behind him, stood his boss, still smoking inside. She sent a thump-up to Ittoki and he really felt like yelling at her. Simply nodding at her, he went to work; starting to serve the many ladies. He caught a glimpse of one of the screens; it was a talk show featuring HAYATO and an oddly familiar face; one of the girls with the fur coats that Ittoki had seen on two occasions. They were featured in a talk show, complete with intros and all. The host presented his guests and a round of applause came from the audience, complete with a panning shot before it was zoomed in on the guest. HAYATO waved and smiled at the audience. But something about him was off. Perhaps it was the lack airbrush but there were noticeable dark rings under his eyes, like he hadn’t been sleeping much. His gaze was empty and hollow, as if his mind was elsewhere. All the girls gushed and squeaked loudly at the sight of him.

Afterwards the host bombarded Tokiya and the woman with questions, mostly about their respective careers. Ittoki returned to work, still very iffy. He rubbed his eyes before he returned to the counter, leaning over it. He could sleep where he stood.

“So, rumors say that the two of you are secretly dating. Is that true?” The host suddenly said.

Everyone went complete silent. One could hear a pin hit the floor with the chilling silence. Not even a whisper. It almost felt unnatural, given how everybody present were conversing at their loudest. Seira was the one to break the silence as she let out a low chuckle and said the following;

“Maybe. HAYATO and I have a… close relationship.”

“Not really.” HAYATO said, his voice cheery and unconvincing. It was the first time, Ittoki heard him apart from singing and quite frankly, he lacked the empty charm that his song had.

“Oh? Don’t say that, Ichi. Have you already forgotten about this morning?” the woman purred and the audience gossiped among themselves. Ichi? HAYATO… Hayato Ichinose. Somehow, it all made sense for Ittoki now although he wondered why Tokiya didn’t associate with his family and yet, had no problem sharing the same nickname.

“Fill us in, you two!” the host said and the audience went wild, cheering and whistling, all hungry for details. From another screen, Ittoki could see that the woman was about to speak while HAYATO’s face grew all red. He smiled feebly but failed to hide the distasteful undertones in his face. The girls in the café went ballistic, complaining how it all was a lie and how this woman was a fraud among lesser tasteful nicknames.

Several times, Haruka had to beg them to be quiet. Why did they even come here in the first place?

The show eventually went on commercial break and the uproar died down. Haruka sighed silently and returned to her duties as she seemed to lighten up.

“Don’t worry, Elizabeth. You did good~!” Natsuki waved to her and she smiled feebly, hastily removing the empty cups and glass from the tables. Ittoki paid no mind to the odd nickname; right now, he had no strength to mentally invest himself in anything now, otherwise he would most likely collapse from exhaustion. Perhaps his boss had noticed his current and decided to take pity on him as she had left her office to see how everything was going.

“You did good, Otoya. Go home and rest.”  She said, her breath heavy of cigarette smoke. The redhead stared blankly at her but finally nodded before he ended his shift. Haruka stared longingly after him, worried it would seem.

But when he got home and hid himself in his bed, he found himself unable to sleep right away. He lay awake, unable to forget that sly purring of the woman with HAYATO, not to mention the man himself. Ittoki wondered what in the world could happen to make the Ichinose family such a dysfunctional haven? Whatever it was, it pained Tokiya greatly and Ittoki wanted to relieve him of the sadness. There were unlimited options to go about this but the best course of action for now was simply talking to Tokiya. Ittoki got the feeling that it would not help him much but at least, it was worth trying.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THIS IS IT, FOLKS. THE ACTUAL SMUT, NO PUSSYFOOTING AROUND, NO COCKBLOCKING. IT’S THE REAL DEAL. 
> 
> Also, sorry for not updating for an entire month. School has been really busy and I've been suffering from writer's block. Also, I had another set of PC problems, which just made shit more tedious. 
> 
> Anywhoo, I hope I can make up for all of you with this chapter.

That night, Ittoki had some insomnia issues. Rarely did it happen but when it did, it hit him like a truck. He lay awake for what felt like forever before getting out of bed and to the kitchen. He was still insanely tired but there were so many thoughts in his head that kept him awake. Fetching a glass from the cupboard, he got some soda from the fridge and poured it up. Sugar was not the best choice right now but who cared. Ittoki sat on the kitchen table, chugging down the glass when something outside caught the corner of his eye. A shadow slowly staggered around in the open hallway, the moon illuminating their silhouette and casting a shadow inside Ittoki’s window. A brief thought of panic popped up in Ittoki’s head and he hurried to the entrance.

_Maybe it was the rouge arsonist._

There had been no news regarding the burning of the Kurosaki house other than the police asking the public for any info that could lead to the potential culprit. Ittoki felt the adrenaline pulsate through his body as he stood right before the door, ready to take down the mystery person. With the adrenaline pumping through his blood, he quickly braced himself before ripping the door open and shouted; 

“Hold it right there!” He was met with a chilling silence and shivers ran down his spine for a bit but he refused to let that get to him and he stared at the stranger with as much bravery as he could muster.

“Ittoki?” A familiar voice exclaimed in surprise and Ittoki brought his actions to an abrupt stop. He stood and gawked at a very surprised Tokiya as the heat crept to his cheeks and he cursed his impulsiveness.

“I-I thought you were the rouge arsonist!” the redhead almost choked on air, feeling the heat rise to his ears. He tried to look elsewhere while the silence of a huge misunderstanding sank in with agonizingly low speed. If he could dig a hole right where he stood and bury himself for a while, he would. Anything to escape the embarrassment.

But a soft chuckle from Tokiya assured him that nothing was as bleak as anticipated. Still, Ittoki found himself riled up and

“Anyone, arsonist or not, knows that you don’t start at the top floor when burning a building down.”

“We-well I didn’t!”  

“Right.” Tokiya shrugged his shoulders before looking away, gazing into the empty night. He took a few deep breaths before averting his gaze to the redhead and just then, Ittoki noticed something troubling. It awoke his senses a bit and he stepped forth, taking Tokiya’s cold hand.

“You look like a zombie. Are you ok?”

“I’m fine, I believe.” The bluenette said nonchalantly, somewhat surprised by the act of affection. There was a tiny hint of melancholy, which Ittoki had adjusted himself to detect. It came with the enigma that was Tokiya Ichinose but that was not to say, it didn’t pain Ittoki whenever he saw the strained attempts of hiding one’s feeling.

“You should stay over for the night.”

* * *

Ittoki’s bed was nowhere as big as Tokiya’s and only once had he slept in it with someone else, that person being Syo many years ago. Therefore, he felt more than a little awkward when Tokiya lay beside him. He noticed that the bluenette always had a certain restraint to him, that controlled every move he made. And that included sleeping; Tokiya lay in such an elegant manner, that made Ittoki want to rile him up a bit. He hid under the blanket and crawled on top of Tokiya, his head peeking out of the blanket. He planted his chin on his lover’s chest, waiting for a response with anticipation.

“What are you doing?” Tokiya asked, bewildered and obviously tired. He attempted to roll over on his side but was caught by the bodyweight of Ittoki.

“You don’t have to be so proper around me. Relax.”

The bluenette scoffed “I’m not being proper. I’m being _me_.”

“Sure ‘bout that?”

Tokiya refrained from an outright answer and instead looked away, seemingly deep in thought. Quickly, he gained focus again but looked ready to say something. He parted his lips but quickly snapped them shut again.

“What’s the matter?”

“Do you think that I…” Tokiya paused again, uncertainty written all over him. He grabbed Ittoki’s shoulders, taking a deep breath before trying again.

 “…Do I treat you well?”

To say that the question came completely out of left field would be an understatement. It took the redhead a couple of moments before he could fully comprehend the randomness of that question, let alone respond.

“Eh? What the heck, of course, you do!” he sounded more unsure than he anticipated, but what was he to do? He had been dropped with such an unexpected kick to the side and frankly, it began to stir the worry that he had suppressed. On the issues of his brother and then there was also the deal with Satou…

The redhead pushed their foreheads together, cupping Tokiya’s face “Don’t ever think for one second that I’m not happy with you.” This seemed to calm Tokiya down for a bit. He shifted his gaze elsewhere before leaving a sigh that suggested content.

“Itt-“

But Tokiya’s words were cut short by a kiss. A kiss that seemed to melt all former prohibitions, the bluenette had up until this point.

“You’re right. It was silly of me to say such a thing. I’ve been on edge lately.”

“It’s ok! No need to apologize.”

“I’ll make up for it.” He said with a strange tone in voice and brushed his thumb across the redhead’s lips. Ittoki, satisfied, for now, could have believed that it was the end of tonight’s escapades if had not been for what happened next. Without warning, Tokiya pushed Ittoki down on his back, their lips meeting in a glorious moment.

“Ichi-“ now it was Ittoki’s turn to be cut short of words. Or perhaps it was by his own merit. Tokiya’s hand slowly slid under his shirt, melting the redhead with his touch. 

“Otoya,” it was the first time that Tokiya had ever used the redhead’s first name and in all seriousness, he had no idea how to feel about it. There were tingles of happiness but also a hint of fear. _For what though?_

“I just said that I’d make it up to you. Did you forget already?”

“N-no…”

“Tomorrow, we need to continue writing our song,” Tokiya said as his hands pulled the t-shirt over Ittoki’s head and carefully let it drop beside the bed. “But for now, I’d like to forget the rest of the world for a while.”

“Mmhm~.” Ittoki felt that there was some level of heavy truth behind those words but he had little time to think over that before he suddenly felt himself switching places with Tokiya, his back now pressing against the mattress. His cheeks deepened into a crimson red as he tried to surpass all the naughty thoughts that entered his mind. Unlike his mother, he believed in no God, but he was pretty sure, his mother would be appalled if mind reading existed. However, it would not seem so impossible after all as a moan escaped his lips by the sensation of Tokiya’s hand caressing his chest, warm and soft fingers running over his nipples.

“Do-don’t surprise me like that!” Ittoki gasped and clenched his fists in the bedsheets. Shivers ran down his spine in synch with Tokiya’s hand, that traveled down his sides. A trail of soft kisses soon followed from the corner of the redhead’s mouth to the crook of his neck; a sensitive spot as evident by the sweet moans that escaped his lips.

“It… tickles!”

There was no answer from Tokiya, just a sigh of content. His hands stopped by the edge of Ittoki’s hips, playing with the short’s traps before he gently pulled them down. Ittoki, in an act of embarrassment, covered his face to hide his red cheeks. He clamped down on his lip to conceal the awkward smile that crept over his lips. His legs quivered as he fought against closing them together.

“Relax.”

“Easy for you to say…”

Without responding, Tokiya moved upwards to face Ittoki once more. He cupped the redhead’s face, pressing their foreheads together.

“I could never forgive myself if I hurt you.”

That was perhaps the sappiest thing, Ittoki had heard in a long time but he’d be a liar if it didn’t warm his heart. He covered his mouth to hide the chummy smile that appeared on his lips.

“What’s with that expression?”

“Nothing. It, uh, it makes me happy~.”

A satisfied sigh escaped the bluenette and he kissed Ittoki’s forehead, letting his hand move to Ittoki’s inner tight. The redhead gasped in surprise but he tried to stay strong, not letting his increasing nervousness getting the better of him. He bit his lip when he felt the edges of Tokiya’s fingers graze his cock. He whimpered, prompting Tokiya to grab the member with his entire hand and a stroke it. Ittoki writhed underneath the bluenette, small moans escaping the back of his throat. It was so incredibly shameless and yet incredibly wonderful. As Tokiya hurried his pace, the redhead could no longer keep his voice down. Cries of pleasure escaped him and he clenched his fist in the bedsheets for comfort. From the deepest pits of his stomach, a familiar sensation fueled by lust began to build itself, driving him over the edge. Any hint of nervousness that was beforehand, was now completely gone.

He clamped down on his lips again, holding back a sultry cry as he reached his climax. It felt like shockwaves raced through him, tingling every nerve in his body. Tokiya’s hand tightened around his member before quickly letting go, dripping semen over Ittoki’s abdomen.

“There’s tissues under the bed.” Ittoki panted out, feeling his body cool down. From where he lay, he watched Tokiya fish underneath the bed to find the tissues.

 “Are you all right?”

“I’m…fine.”

“Do you want to go on?”

“Yes. If you want to.” Ittoki said without a second thought. He remembered the disappointment, he felt after the “episode” in the bathroom. To finally take the next step with Tokiya was like a dream coming true, no matter how perverted it was.

The bluenette sat up, looking ready to say something but remained quiet. Instead, he fished his pants from the floor and proceeded to fish in the pockets until he pulled out a small package. Knowing what it was, Ittoki’s eyes widened as he watched Tokiya apply the condom on himself, all with this stoic expression before inching his towards the redhead, meeting eye to eye once more.

“It’s a bit embarrassing.” the redhead said while the crimson crept over his face. He glanced out of the window, avoiding the blue eyes looking directly at him.

“I know, it is. Just relax. I promise to be gentle.” The bluenette said, his voice husky. His usually stoic tone held a kind of warmth that calmed Ittoki down somewhat. Less anxious, he nodded and tried to ignore the shivers that ran down his spine as Tokiya pressed his erection against his entrance. The redhead whimpered, pulling him close. His entire body tensed up, starting with strong contractions in his gut.

As promised, Tokiya was gentle as one could possibly be, thrusting slowly inside the redhead. There was a sharp, stinging pain at first that made Ittoki winch.

“Does it hurt?”

“Y-yeah.”

Instead of answering right away, Tokiya hoisted Ittoki’s lower body to thrust all the way inside, slowly as possible. It didn’t hurt as much but the pain still stung regardless. Ittoki t

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. I’m good. Mm…” Ittoki moaned, wrapping his legs around Tokiya’s hips. The pain subdued itself fairly faster than he had expected and with every thrust, the contractions got stronger, eventually drowned in a soothing bliss. He cried out loudly in pleasure, nails digging into the bedsheets as Tokiya slammed their hips together. His entire body trembled with pleasure and he wrapped his arms around Tokiya’s neck, burying his face in the crook.

“It feels good~,” he said, biting his lips to compose himself even if he failed miserably.

Underneath his own wails, he caught the faint sound of a faint groaning and he considered himself to be the happiest person on the planet.  He would not be able to hold on much longer as every thrust hit _that_ sweet spot, pushing Ittoki over the edge. Clenching his hands into fists he tightened his grip on his lover before a dizzying swirl pushed him to climax once more.

The feeling out Tokiya pulling out made him feel oddly empty and he was not quite used to the emptiness. Rolling over, Ittoki made space for Tokiya, who quickly tidied himself up before laying down. His body was still very hot for the sex from earlier and his head was reeling. Every nerve of his body was still tingling and if Tokiya had slightly touched him right now, it was sure to give him another fit of shivers.

The redhead inched closer to Tokiya, who was “Ichi,”

“Hm?”

“Thanks.”

“No need to thank me.” Tokiya sighed and ran a hand across Ittoki’s cheek. He pulled him closer, nuzzling his nose in Ittoki’s hair. He wrapped his arms around his lover, pulling him close. 

If Ittoki had the ability to create a new set of words that could describe this delightful happiness, he could. He wondered if Tokiya felt the same way.

Of course, he did.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ittoki and Tokiya go to visit Ittoki's mother.   
> Just fluff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while, hasn't it?  
> Well, I've been busy with life and preparing to move out of the house. BUT I feel like I've neglected my dear readers for too long so here's a short update to make amends.

“Ichi,” Ittoki said as he placed the cup of milk on the table. He shivered a little when approaching his lover, taking the time to shrug off any sense of insecurity. It had taken him a lot of courage to even begin this conversation and only here at nighttime, did he finally make a move, nervous as he was.

Tokiya looked away from his laptop, arching an eyebrow. It may just had been an illusion but his eyes appeared more piercing through his reading glasses.

“Let me meet your family,” Ittoki said. He felt a sudden relief, like a boulder being left off his shoulders. But in that same moment, came the nervousness.

It took a while for Tokiya to fully respond before his eyes grew wide and he narrowed them again, souring his expression. It failed to help Ittoki’s growing anxiousness.

“Why?” He said as calmly as ever with no hint of negativity.

“Well, we’re dating now. So, it’d be nice to meet my in-laws.“ This was only partly true as Ittoki would also like to have an insight on their life regarding the treatment of their second son. But first, he needed to get the permission from Tokiya, who was, simply put, not cooperative. The redhead sat down on the couch next to his lover and reached for his hand.

“It means a lot to me if they accept you – and us.”  He tightened his squeeze around the bluenette hand, looking him square into his eyes. Tokiya looked borderline disturbed by the idea of his parents having any knowledge of his love life.

“I hate it when you look at me like that and I can’t say no.” The bluenette scoffed, looking away to hide the blush that crept over his face. “But that’s not a yes!”

“Ichi~.” Ittoki cooed, leaning closer in a teasing manner but was dismissed by a not so convinced Tokiya. He pushed his glasses back onto the bridge of his nose when Ittoki closed in, wrapping his arm around his waist.  The bluenette flinched a bit, almost dropping the laptop on the floor. That was an unexpected reaction but a reaction nonetheless and Ittoki enjoyed that. He enjoyed all sides of Tokiya but he absolutely loved the soft side; the one that got flustered and embarrassed so easily but yet was loving and kind.

“Stop that, geez,” Tokiya said, reaching out to save his laptop. 

“When?” The redhead rested his head on his lover’s shoulder, smiling innocently, indifferent to the objections sent his way. He let out a deep, content sigh. To say life was good would be an understatement.

“Never.” The bluenette scoffed, not resisting the affectionate gesture. He wrapped an arm around Ittoki.

“Don’t worry. I’ll behave. I promise.” The bluenette tightened his grip, deep in thought. He had often done that since the talk show with HAYATO. Although he didn’t work as much, there were many things on his mind still. Although Ittoki was floating on cloud nine, he wished that Tokiya would speak up about those thoughts.

“It’s not you, it’s…them.”

There was a hint of pain in Tokiya’s voice as he finished speaking, his eyes trailing off to somewhere. His expression was grave and it hurt to see him this.

“I just don’t want them to ruin things between us. …Besides, you promised that you’d be my family.” Tokiya’s hand slipped underneath Ittoki’s chin, tilting the redhead’s face upwards.

“Speaking of which, you haven’t met my family either. How about it?”

“…I guess.” Tokiya shrugged his shoulders. His expression softened a bit but he was obviously weary about the entire situation.

“Then it’s settled!” Ittoki cupped the bluenette face, pushing their foreheads together. Indeed, it was; Tokiya needed this. Someone to accept him, where his own family failed to-  

* * *

It had been eons ago since Ittoki had been back in his hometown, let alone visiting his mother. The town was located somewhere on the country side, so the pair had to walk quite a bit to reach the village. The first building that Tokiya noticed was the large church. His blue eyes inspected the building with a puzzled look on his face. Choir songs and an organ playing could be heard, although muffled due to the church’s wall.

“Yeah, this is a religious community.”

“Is your mother religious?” Tokiya raised an eyebrow. He was clearly weary, perhaps fearing that Ittoki’s devotion to his mother and her beliefs coming in the way of their relationship.

That was a legit question. Ittoki had already made it clear that he didn’t believe in anything particularly. Even so, he did carry around o rosary on him always. It was a little ironic that he had grown up and raised in such a community with these norms and whatnot, and had converted to what could be summarized as something he simply didn’t care enough about. Although he knew that the townsfolk loved him regardless, they’d die of shock if they found out that he was dating another man, let alone not religious. 

“Yeah, well sort of.”

“My mom went to Catholic school and then became a nun.” He had been raised alone without a father figure in his life but it had never bothered him. His mother was a great parent and Ittoki owed her everything good that ever happened in his life.

The pair passed a playground where a rather large group of children were playing. Ittoki remembered the lot of them immediately. He would always pass this place on his way to high school and on occasion play with them. As some of the kids took a break from their games, they suddenly noticed Ittoki standing there. Excitement was written all over their faces and they came flocking towards him and Tokiya, who seemed rather irked by the storm of children coming his way.

“Otoya!” the children jumped up and down in glee, a million questions coming out of their mouths. It was heartwarming to see that they all remembered him.

Eventually, the question about Tokiya came and the children went silent as their eyes grew wide.

“This is Tokiya. He’s a good friend of mine.” Ittoki smiled, albeit nervously. However, “good friend” was only half the truth but it wasn’t something that could be so easily explained to children and certainly not _these_ children. All hell would break loose if he dared to hint at something “untraditional”. As happy as he was about coming here, he was also increasingly anxious.

The children now pestered Tokiya with questions, to which the bluenette cringed at. One girl pulled his hand, asking to touch his hair among other privacy-invading questions. Ittoki had to try hard in order not to laugh out loud.

After having passed several villas and white picket fences while walking the kids home one by one, the pair now reached a small house, located near the end of the town. It was a small to-story house with a nicely kept front garden. It paled in comparison to Ren’s mansion but it was cozy in its own right.  A fuzzy feeling grew within Ittoki by the sight of his childhood home.

“Here we are.”

“I see,” Tokiya replied, deeply in awe. His eyes glazed over the entire structure, clearly deep in thought. He studied every detail of the house as he followed the redhead to the front door. He raised an eyebrow when Ittoki neglected to knock and instead walked directly in.

“Otoya?”

“It’s fine, my mother doesn’t mind as long as it’s me.” Ittoki smiled before hanging his jacket on the coat hanger and doing the same with Tokiya’s coat. As he was busy with making the wobbly coat hanger to cooperate, Tokiya studied the small entre. The walls were covered by pictures and paintings and on the shelves, stood small figurines of animals. Ittoki made a mental note to explain it sometime.

“Hello? Mon, I’m home.”

A muffled shuffling came from somewhere nearby and the sound of a creaking door soon followed. Then a woman, small and meek of stature appeared. She had brown hair tied in a bun with a few strains coming lose. Her hazel eyes lit up when she saw Ittoki, her lips curving into a bright smile.

“Otoya!” she exclaimed in glee and skipped towards the redhead, giving him a big hug. “So good to see you, dear!”

“You too, mom.” Ittoki smiled, relishing in his mother’s embrace. After a few moments, the broke apart and just then his mother noticed Tokiya, who had been silently watching the entire time. It appeared that this was quite the extraordinary compared to what he was used to. Ittoki could only imagine how impersonal family get togethers in the Ichinose family were. Therefore, it would a must that Ittoki gave the best experience doing their stay here.

“I want you to meet someone.” The redhead pointed towards Tokiya and his mother stood and analyzed him with great curiosity.

“Tokiya Ichinose. I’m Otoya’s… friend. Pleased to meet you.” The bluenette reached out his hand with a small smile on his lips. Ittoki’s mother was a little lost upon seeing the hand as barely anyone did that anymore in this town. However, she had not completely forgotten her manners as she took his hand and they had a brief shake.

“The pleasure is all mine. Please, call me Chifuyu.” 

* * *

“And lastly, Otoya’s old room.” Chifuyu opened the last door on the hallway, bringing an end to their tour. The house was already small. So, it hadn’t become much of a tour. Still, Tokiya absorbed all the new impressions like a sponge. Tokiya was the first to enter the old room 

“Now you boys stay here and make yourself feel at home while I go down and fix some snacks. Is there anything you prefer to drink? For Otoya, I presume that he’s so old that he’d like a cup of black coffee. ´” His mother smirked, fully knowing her son’s distaste for coffee. “And you, Ichinose?”

“Just tea, if you got that.”

“Same, mom.” Ittoki scoffed.

His mother let out a chuckle before she disappeared behind the doorframe, leaving the two young men alone. Tokiya’s analyzing glance stopped at the many medals and trophies on one of the shelves. A reminder of his days in middle school. Under a table lay a ball, making it rather clear for Tokiya that his lover was once a soccer player.

“You don’t play anymore?” The bluenette asked as he grabbed a photo from eons ago. It was a picture of Ittoki in middle school with his soccer team. It had been the same place where he had met Syo, even if he had dropped soccer after their first day of training. Ironically, Syo was the only other person whom he had stayed in contact with after all those years.

“No. I had an accident.” Ittoki shrugged. In reality, it was a knee injury caused by a few cheaters before the big game. But that was a story for another day. Tokiya put the picture back in its place and headed towards the redhead. Perhaps he had noticed a hint of bitterness. Ittoki was a little bit startled by the soft hand that caressed his cheek.

“I’m sorry.”

“What? It’s fine. I’m over it and has been so for a long time.” The redhead let out a carefree smile. He tried to ensure his lover that everything was all right; nothing needed to be worried about. Besides, his accident as a relic of the past. Tokiya didn’t believe him at first, as evident by his furrowed brow.

“It’s all right, I swear,” The redhead tried his damnest to be reassuring. However, Tokiya was close to protesting when suddenly Chifuyu called from the stairs.

“Boys, tea is ready”

Before they left the room, Ittoki sent Tokiya one last smile, and it would appear that all of the bluenette tensions lessened. The tea had a strong aromatic scent that filled the entire house; a sweet green tea with Jasmine flowers. The pair descended the staircase and made way to the conjoined living room and kitchen. Chifuyu waved the pair over to the small table on the living room. Three cups were placed on the table along with some sugar and milk.

“It was so nice of you paying your mother a visit, Otoya.”

“Don’t mention it.” The redhead laughed. “How are you?”

Chifuyu let out a deep sigh and took a sip of her tea before speaking. Her tone had a pinch of dread, something that irked Ittoki.

“Well, it could have been better.” She sighed once more, putting the cup down on the table. “Times are changing and your poor mother just can’t keep up.”

“But enough about me, how about you, Ichinose? What are you studying?” Chifuyu quickly shifted her attention to Tokiya, her gaze brimming with curiosity. She smiled warmly at the bluenette, and hints of Tokiya’s earlier tensions soon faded.

“Musicology, Ma’am-I mean, Chifuyu.”

“You know, that’s what Otoya wanted to study but his average was too low. Such a shame that he gets so nervous during exams.”

That stung but Ittoki couldn’t find it within himself to be mad at his mother. Instead, he gave an affirmative nod as he tried to force a carefree smile.

“Which reminds me, we will soon get our results for the two-day exam,” Tokiya said, as calmly as ever.

“Oh really?” Chifuyu and Ittoki exclaimed simultaneously. That exam had completely left Ittoki’s mind since the day when he turned it in. While he was happy for the news, it also scared him to no end. He had out tears and blood in that assignment and he was pretty sure he’d get depression if he did not get a decent grade for all of his vigorous work.

* * *

Not much had changed in the kitchen, in terms of silverware and other house items. Ittoki stood and studied an old mug, he used to drink hot chocolate with. On it was a small painting of baby Jesus and Virgin Mary in Bethlehem. The mug was ugly; the humans looked more like deformed alien but still, he held many close memories with the cup. Tokiya had left to use the restroom, leaving Ittoki to help his mother out although she seemed to do well on her own.

“Otoya,” Chifuyu said, rinsing the cups before fully cleaning them with soap.

“Yes, mom?” Ittoki put the ugly mug away and wiped some dust off a shelf.

“When did you plan on telling me?” her tone suddenly shifted into something serious, completely grabbing her son’s attention, who was anxious to see where she was going. Did she find out? She couldn’t have possibly done that, could she?

“Tell you what?” The redhead played the ignorance card, the sweat of nervousness starting to build on his forehead.

“That you two are in a relationship.” His mother replied with absolute nonchalance. She turned around to look her son directly in the eyes, her gaze piercing right through him. His mother had never looked at him like that before and it made Ittoki panic albeit internally.

Those words felt like a slap in the face. He had been found out unreasonably quickly. He feared the absolute worst; the idea of his mother disowning him, his only family in this world, was a fate worse than death. 

“Wait-we-we’re not! I swear!” he tried his best to deny the allegations, although even he knew how unconvincing he sounded. The fact that Ittoki was terrible at sucking was no secret to those who knew him, let alone his mother.

A chuckle escaped the elder woman as her lips curled into a warm smile. The coldness in her eyes disappeared and she had returned to be the same old woman that had raised him, calming Ittoki down in the process.

“I raised you well. You’re an awful liar.” She shook her head. “But, I’m happy that you finally found love.”

“How did you know?”

“The way that you look at him… I may have been a nun but I know true affection when I see it. You treasure him deeply. Keep on to that love.”

“Mom…” Ittoki had to try hard in order not to cry. He rubbed his eyes to get rid of the building tears. To hear those words from his mother had brought the greatest feeling of joy possible. He was truly blessed with a mother as loving as she was.

“Aw, don’t cry, dear.” Chifuyu chuckled once more, embracing her son. “To be honest, I always had this suspicion.” She pulled away from Ittoki, facing him straight on.

“You were never quite like the other boys. You were always… how to out it... Late in the game? Is that what kids call it nowadays?”

How foolish of him to not have figured out that his mother already had noticed by now. Of course, she would. He had always dreaded the day where he had to tell her the truth, especially when Tokiya had become a part of his life. Indeed, Ittoki was happy but something about how obvious he had been irked him to no end. Sure, she was his mother but he had tried so hard to keep it hidden and to no avail.

“But promise me that you won’t give anyone in the town, funny ideas.” Chifuyu’s tone changed into something more serious. Her eyes narrowed as a hand touched Ittoki’s shoulder. No need to remind him twice of the situation, he’d be in if the rest of the community knew.

In the bliss of the moment, Tokiya had left the restroom and now stood awkwardly in the entrance of the kitchen.

“Do I come at a bad time?” the bluenette asked, polite yet nonchalant as always.

“No, dear,” Chifuyu said as she walked over towards him. “We were just having a simple chat.”

Tokiya looked at her for a bit before shifting his gaze towards Ittoki, who was still wiping the tears away from his eyes. He sent the redhead a worried look but a wave from Ittoki confirmed that nothing was amiss. On the contrary, everything was fantastic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since we don’t know what Ittoki’s adoptive mother is called, I just gave her the name of Chifuyu. Also, next chapter will have lots and lots of dramaz so get ready.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We get some plot and stuff with everyone's favorite redheaded soccer player.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello peeps~! It’s been a while, hasn’t it? I apologize for that. I’ve actually moved out of the house and I’ve been busy preparing for exams and the upcoming semester. Now that I’m finally settled, I figured it would only be cruel of me if continued to delay the story any further. So here you with an update! And plot!

The rest of the week passed by rather uneventfully. Thankfully, it left Ittoki with more time to spend with Tokiya. Although the bluenette worked endlessly as he always did, Ittoki could not find it within himself to get frustrated. Besides, school was beginning again, which gave him plenty of time to keep himself occupied.

As usual, when he was not at home, he was at work, serving the regulars. For once, the sun had decided to shine upon the town today; sharp beams of light piercing through the glass window, which coincidently interfered with Tokiya’s job as he sat at his usual spot. Even still, he worked endlessly with his blue eyes focused on the laptop screen. He was exceptionally handsome like this and a blush crept over Ittoki’s face as he remembered their first sexual encounter. 

“Oh, my word!” Natsuki piped up next to him, staring at him intensely. “Your face!”

Embarrassed, Ittoki brushed Natsuki off, much to the curiosity of both him and Haruka. The young woman looked over the shoulder of the blonde with her big glossy eyes.

“Let him be, Natsuki.” She said with a certain sparkle in her eyes. She had done that quite lately, a trait that followed with her increasingly outgoing approach to the job. But her soft and gentle smile remained the same, although it appeared much more often.

Honestly, it made Ittoki pleased to see her come out of her shell like this.

“You’re doing good, Haruka.” He smiled at her, almost causing the poor girl to drop the coffee that she was about to serve. A chummy smile emerged on her face and she hurried off the customer with the coffee, stammering as she spoke. Although she had her back turned to him, her very red ears suggested immense blushing.

Once she was done with the customer, she hurried back behind the counter.

“Th-thank you.” She stammered, hiding her face behind the tray. “You flatter me.”

“Otoya, come here, will ya’?” Ittoki’s boss called from her office as she opened the door. Cautiously, the redhead turned around, wary of what she had to say. She always used his last name when talking to him so it came as a surprise when she had requested his presence just now. He took a deep breath as he closed the door behind him.

“Yes?”

“Look, I need to be honest with you. You’re one of the veterans here, agreed?” the Boss said as she killed her last cigarette. He wouldn’t call himself a direct veteran but out of the three people currently employed, he had been there the longest and therefore knew his ins and outs of the café.

“I-I guess so.”

“Good. And you’re been following the news with all the crazy shit, that’s been happening in town? You know, the Kurosaki house burning and stuff?” Her expression was as grave as Ittoki had feared it to be to which he only nodded.

“Court proceedings are all over the place. Rumors say that it’s members from other rival groups like the Hijirikawa group.” She sighed and fished for another cigarette. It was ironic that she had a “no smoking” policy in the café, yet her office reeked of said smoke with the walls and curtains painted yellow with nicotine. How that would be washed off was everyone’s guess.

 “Wait what?”

“My reaction exactly. But it’s only rumors and no one knows what to believe. It’s a giant fuckin g mess. But enough about that.” The boss managed to find yet another cancer stick and ignite it, blowing smoke out of her nose before she got to the topic at hand.

“I want to promote you as my second-in-command.” The Boss said, leaning over the table. She took a deep swig from the cigarette before speaking again.

“Me? But why?”

“For starters, it’s because I trust you the most. Second, with all the unrest in the city, you can bet your redheaded butt on the fact that it’s dangerous at night and I don’t want my store to be ruined by a pyromaniac or other rascals.”

A pause soon followed alongside the sound of silence as she quietly shook some ash into the ashtray, sitting on the table, which was admittingly messy. There were papers everywhere, even on the floor. The table had all kinds of gadgets and gizmos placed on it with no theme or purpose other than the fact that they just needed to be there. 

“Third, and this is without my influences. We got a sponsor who said he knows you and told me to put faith in you. I didn’t know, you did guitar covers too.”

His heart skipped a beat by those words as it had occurred to him that his own boss had actually discovered his hobby. He didn’t mind the fact that people knew but it irked him that his boss brought it up all of a sudden. When Ittoki thought about that and the fact that a sponsor was involved, it all now became crystal clear as to what was going on.

Suddenly, the back door to the office opened and a familiar face stepped in, as Ittoki had predicted. Sato stood in the entrance with sunglasses obscuring his face. A sly smirk danced on his lips as he closed the door behind him and removed the glasses to stuff them into a pocket on his fancy white suit.

“Greetings, Ittoki. It’s been a while, has it not? Congratulations on your new promotion.”

* * *

The key to the café fitted oddly well in the palm of his hand. This whole situation felt odd in general. Sure, Ittoki could understand the worries of his boss with the formerly nonexistent crime rates now going up but a sponsorship and with Sato of all people?!

Somehow, he couldn’t help but feel that something was amiss here. Like, Sato had pulled some unwarranted strings behind the scenes.

But then again, he could be wrong. After all, all of this was based on his own personal feelings for Sato, which in turn was based on Tokiya’s reaction and behavior. Tokiya did not get along with Sato but who was to say that Ittoki wouldn’t?

Therefore, he now stood in front of the address located the lap of paper that he had received, once he had left his boss’ office. It was a one-story building located at the other end of town so Ittoki had been forced to take a bus to the location in question.

Once he stepped inside the building, Ittoki was met with the shiniest floor that ever shined. Looking down, he was met with an exact mirror image of himself. Alongside the white perfect floor tiles, he was met with perfect white walls and a few black lamps hanging from the ceiling. Despite the limited lighting, the entrance itself was rather light due to the white color scheme with hints of a monochromatic design.

“Oh my, you came!” Sato greeted the redhead from one of the doors in the far end. His amber eyes twinkled of what looked like glee. He waved Ittoki over before disappearing in the doorway, prompting the redhead to walk down the seemingly endless hallway. At the very end, he saw a black door with ragged scribbles on it in white. Judging from the rather pretentious atmosphere, he figured that it probably meant something but he’d be damned if he could come up with one suggestion.

 “Does Ichinose know that you’re here?” Sato stepped outside again before Ittoki could enter the room. His tone was rather cautious, putting the redhead on edge.

“No.”

“I see. Well, come inside then. There’s someone, I’d like you to meet.”

In the small room, there were more monochromatic designs but this time, a table and a couple of chairs added a much-needed dash of color. However, Ittoki’s attention was focused on something entirely different; the familiar face that sat at the table, smiling at him. 

“You?!” Ittoki exclaimed in utter surprise.

“Yo, Otoyan!” Reiji waved at him with a bright smile. He tipped his fedora upwards so he could better get a look at the redhead.

“Oh, I see that you already know each other. Well, it makes my job a lot more easier.” Sato interluded and closed the door behind Ittoki. He walked to the other end of the office, where a shelf was, to fumble with some papers hidden in a folder.

“Mhm~! We do need to go beer-bowling again. It was fun!”

“I... uh, ok? Uhm, Sato-“

“Shall we get started, gentlemen?” Sato turned to the two young men, handing them a small stack of paper each.

“With what?” Ittoki scoffed as he stared at the stack. On the front, “Hyper Super Love” was written on it. He was curious to look further into the folder but a thought emerging in the back of his head gave him an idea of what this was about.

“Oh, your boss didn’t tell you? You will be recording a song with Reiji here. I got to sponsor that café and in turn, you record a song for me.”

“It will be lots of fun! I adore your voice, Otoyan!”

“Don’t worry about Ichinose. We will not make your name public when we release the single.” Sato said as if he had somehow managed to read Ittoki’s thoughts. He walked past the redhead to open the door and direct them out of the office. Weary, Ittoki measly followed with Reiji right behind him.

“Does that include me too~?” Reiji asked, speaking with that teasing tone of his. If he wanted to sound genuinely upset, he failed spectacularly. The trio headed to the end of the hallway; to the door with the white scribbles on it. Upon further inspection, it finally occurred to Ittoki that those white markings were actually music notes.  

“We’ll see.” Was the simple and blunt answer from Sato as he opened the door, revealing a recording studio behind it. The studio was as fancy as Ittoki had imagined it to be, with the most exquisite technology that money could buy. Sato guided the two young men to yet another door, that led to a soundproof room with several microphones. Once the initial surprise had settled, Ittoki looked through the sheets, taking special notice at the cheesy lyrics. But then again, they appealed to him in a bizarre manner. It left him curious about the musical composition.

Inside the recording booth, a small table was located right underneath the window with several headphones laying there. Assuming the most basic of scenarios, Ittoki reached for the headphone and put it around his neck. Afterwards, he looked through the chords and lyrics once more, subconsciously humming the melody.

“I wrote the lyrics all by myself. Do you like them?”

“Err… actually, I didn’t know that you liked music this much”

“Hehe, well it’s more of a hobby if anything. A hobby that also brings money when the family business at home doesn’t go too well.”

“Business?”

“Yep~! My mom owns a diner and I work there when not in school. It’s a really neat place and you should totally drop by some time~.”

A knock on the window interrupted the conversation as a rather displeased Sato ordered the duo to put on the headphones and within moments, the music began to play. With a title like “Hyper Super Love”, it did not surprise Ittoki that the music would be the most funkiest jam imaginable.

* * *

The recording process had awakened some underlying feelings within Ittoki; feelings, that he had only come to realize once the whole charade was over. He hated to admit it but he enjoyed himself more than he could ever imagine. Singing brought out an emotional outlet for him, even if he didn’t need it.

Not to mention that he had found himself liking Reiji as a person more than before.

It had been a while since he and Tokiya and worked on their song. Even still, he could feel that he had needed this for a long time. To be able to sing again; it was refreshing.

However, it frustrated that Sato knew this too. The look on the man’s face after the recording was all too knowing. For what other reason would he hand Ittoki the contract for a record deal?  Something about this whole situation irked him a bit. He would have loved to say no but then again, what would that mean for the Boss and her café, let alone his job?

But most of all, what would Tokiya say if he discovered this?

It was close to evening, once Ittoki got home. He could feel the events of the day weighing on him, draining his energy like sand through an hourglass. His appetite was nonexistent today for some reason, especially considering that he hadn’t eaten all day. Before ascending the stairs to his apartment and looked up, his heart sinking a bit when he saw light in the apartment next to his. It would not surprise him if he would be asked about today’s happenings.

Sighing deeply, he walked up the stairs with hasty steps. Soon, he stood in front of his apartment door, fumbling with the keys before he finally found his way inside. Once he had entered and closed the door behind him, he let himself slump down the door as the events of the day settled within him. He could almost have fallen asleep where he sat if it was not due to a knock on the door.

“Otoya.” Tokiya’s muffled voice called out for him.

Although tired, Ittoki soon stood up and opened the door; a fatigued smile appeared on his lips.

“You look exhausted.” The bluenette correctly concluded before putting a hand on Ittoki’s cheek, causing his smile to brighten a bit more.

“Eehehe, tough day at work and stuff.”

“I could imagine so. You’re not too tired to have a moment?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> End: Note. I’ve had a few thoughts about this series and I have decided to make more reverse harem yaoi series. Now, I cannot tell when the next part of this series will be posted, but I can say that I have scripts and ideas ready while “Yours Truly” is nearing its third act and resolution.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Planting the seeds for the other stories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eugh, it has been so long since my last update. Dammit, life.  
> I think two or three chapters in will mark the end of this.  
> Also I promise, more sex! I didn't mark this as mature for nothing-

“I will be going away for a while and studying abroad. Starting tomorrow.”

“O-oh. Is that so?” Ittoki forced himself to smile, so he could hide the obvious disappointment. Then again, he couldn’t allow himself to be offended by this; Tokiya was his own person and a rather private one at that. And still, Ittoki couldn’t deny that he was feeling rather hurt over this bit of news. That feeling must have been apparent because Ittoki soon felt a soft hand cupping his cheek. He looked up to see Tokiya with an almost… pained expression on his face.

“I apologize.” The bluenette said in a tone so alien to the redhead’s ears. He sighed deeply before removing his hand but not before Ittoki managed to catch it.  “It’s OK. I’m not mad. I just…I just wished you’d tell me before…”

Tokiya soon returned to his usual cool and stoic expression although he did not let go of Ittoki. Instead, he gave the redhead’s hand a tight squeeze. “I would if I knew sooner. And just texting it to you would seem beyond unipersonal. So, I waited for you to come home.”

“…You really are an amazing person.”

“Ah?”

“I’m glad that I fell in love with you.” Ittoki smiled, wrapping his arms around the bluenette. He realized that letting go was a lot harder than perceived, especially when Tokiya hugged him back, burying his face in the crook of the redhead’s neck.

“…You flatter me. But I… I appreciate it.”

* * *

Anxious and slightly terrified, Ittoki grabbed his laptop on his way to the couch. He planned on going to bed early today so he could travel with Tokiya to the airport the next morning. But first, he had to check the results of his exam. He always hated this side of school; the crushing anxiety that arrived with seeing one’s grades. Since he had never been the studious type, the threat of an F always hung over his head like a nuke ready to be dropped. Taking a deep breath, he opened his laptop and searched through the campus system to find his grade. And let out a deep sigh of relief as he looked at the C on the screen, closing the laptop to let a sense of triumph wash over him for his hard work.

“What’s the matter?” Tokiya asked, standing in the doorway to the bathroom. He was wearing practically nothing else but a towel around his waist, exposing his excellent figure. If dictionaries were picture books, Tokiya’s body would be listed under the definition of “gorgeous”. Ittoki had to look away for a second to shoo away the raunchy thoughts piling in his head.

“I barely passed.” He said as reality began sinking in. “And I think I realized how much I hate school.”

“So why didn’t you take a more practical degree then? Like a plumber?” Tokiya raised an eyebrow, the towel perfectly fastened around his hips as he leaned against the door. There were still a few droplets of water dripping from his hair.

“Should I then grow a mustache and jump on shitake mushrooms, screaming ‘wahoo’?” the redhead smiled as he closed his laptop; the damn thing was so old that nowadays, bits and pieces of it would pop out of it. However, it functioned so it would suffice.

“Would that also include gaining a ballooning weight? Because you’re already heavy enough.”

“Aw man, that’s mean, Tokiya~! These are rusty but manly muscles!”

“Manly muscles rarely go well together with a babyface like yours. But that means that no one else will have you and I can keep you to myself. Now come to bed.” The bluenette commanded as he made way for the bedroom but neglected to close the door while he got dressed. A chummy smile crept over Ittoki’s face and he packed away his school work and walked towards the bedroom. His heart thumped with excitement when he saw Tokiya, moist from the bath, standing in the middle of the floor and only wearing a couple of boxers.

“Hmph. You’re like a hormonal teenager.” Tokiya narrowed his eyes and turned away while a smirk edged on his lips.

“It-it can’t be helped when you are standing there…like that!”

The bluenette headed towards the curtains which he pulled over the window before walking over to the drawer where some jogging clothes lay on a black suitcase.

 “I know. I just want to rile you up. Being with you is a…” Tokiya paused, his gaze drifting out of focus as he seemed to collect his thoughts. “It’s a breath of fresh air.” He finally said with unrivaled seriousness.

“Ahahaha, I guess it’s now my turn to be flattered.” Ittoki blushed as he looked down and felt the implications of the bluenette’s words.

“You don’t need to be. You’re the best thing that has happened to me in a while.”

“It makes me happy to hear that, although I wish you didn’t say that right now since you are going and all…”

“…I don’t think I’ll ever get a chance to do it again…” Tokiya suddenly said, just low enough to escape Ittoki’s field of hearing.

“What was that?”

“Nothing,” Tokiya shook his head, his eyes lighting up again. “I was just remembering something for tomorrow. Let’s go to bed.”

* * *

The bedroom was still cast in a deep dark when Ittoki woke up. He rubbed his eyes and let his senses come back to life when he suddenly heard a soft sobbing beside him. Waiting a few moments to see if his senses were playing a trick on him. But it continued and a sinking feeling emerged in the put of his stomach. Slowly, Ittoki turned to Tokiya and mustered up the courage to pop the question.

“Tokiya. Are you… crying?”

“N-no. I’m just-just tired.” His voice was brittle and low, completely unlike what it usually was like.

Not responding, Ittoki wrapped his arms and Tokiya and pressed his face into the crook of the bluenette’s neck. He should probably have said something but he found himself at a loss for words. Something about the way Tokiya had acted worried him for some reason. He couldn’t help that there was something heavy weighting on his lover’s mind and letting him leave, was sure to make it worse. Somehow.

He could feel the bluenette tense up in the embrace, only to relax soon after. Something told the redhead that Tokiya would not appreciate it if he kept nagging. So instead, he kept his silence and continued to hold the bluenette.

“You’re an awful liar,” Ittoki said after a while as a round of silence followed afterward, until Tokiya wriggled out of the embrace and turned to the redhead.

“There are… some things that aggravate me. But I can’t… voice it. Not now at least.”

“I may not understand but I’m here for you, aren’t I?”

An uncomfortable silence entered the room before Tokiya broke it.

“…There lies the problem. You _don’t_ understand.”

“But-“ the redhead protested before being cut off by a warm hand over his own.

“It’s all right. I’ll get over it, like I usually do. No need to bother yourself with my inconveniences.”

* * *

The following morning, the pair rose from the bed, albeit in silence. The awkwardness of yesterday’s encounter hung heavily in the air. Neither had the courage to bring it up with the other, although Tokiya seemingly tried to sweep it under the rug but on the other hand, it worried Ittoki more than before. There was something about this… trip that left Tokiya in a state of turmoil and that part was even more painful than the revelation that he didn’t trust the redhead. At least not enough to voice his worries.

And suddenly a heavy shadow of doubt hung over Ittoki.

Did they really belong together?

“Take care,” Tokiya said, after having locked the door to his apartment. They had neglected to eat breakfast as the bluenette planned to do so at the airport. Feeling bluer than ever before, Ittoki jittered when a warm hand touched his cheek.

“It’s all right. I’ll be home soon.”

“…Ok,” Ittoki said with a gloomier tone than he intended. He forced a smile to erase all incoming tensions. And suddenly Tokiya was gone, and in his absence, a hole emerged in Ittoki’s chest as his smile broke. A heavy feeling lingered over him as he went home to prepare for work. With his new promotion, he had to work mornings as well but he didn’t feel like it. He could call in sick but that would implicate that he couldn’t handle the job. Although he would rather roll up in his bed and forget the world existed, he had no choice but to do what every other responsible adult did; work.

* * *

“What’s up?” Tomochika leaned over the counter, staring the redhead down. For once her hair didn’t flail around all over the place as she had pulled said hair into a bun. Behind her, Natsuki and Haruka were lurking around, serving a few customers.

“Huh? Ah, nothing.” Ittoki said, nonchalantly. A woman neared the counter to order some cupcakes and Ittoki quickly served her while Tomochika impatiently stared at him.

“Otoya, when you are depressed, the natural order of things has been disrupted. In other words, it’s so unnatural that it practically radiates from you.” She finally said after the woman had left.

“…it has been a while since you called me by my first name…”

“Well, that lets you know that I’m hella serious, right? Now, what’s the problem? Girl problems? Daddy issues?”

Disgruntled, Ittoki shrugged his shoulders as Natsuki arrived with an order and the redhead headed to the coffee machines to make some lattes.

“You know I don’t have a dad nor a girlfriend.” He said tiredly.

“About the latter…” Tomochika suddenly staled before fishing through her pockets and putting two tickets on the counter. On the tickets, the word “HEAVENS” was spelled out with a star on where the “A” should be. Right underneath the name, there was a picture of seven young men around Ittoki’s age, except for one, who looked no older than thirteen.  

“Guess who just managed to land two Student tickets a concert at Otori Academy!” Tomochika proudly exclaimed, causing a few heads to turn.

“What does any of this have to do with my so-called girl problems?” Ittoki whispered to her, annoyed and embarrassed. He kept glancing around the café as the people soon turned their attention elsewhere.

“Duh, what do you think! I’m giving these to you so you can invite Haruka!” Tomochika said with much enthusiasm. Her eyes almost sparkled, whereas Ittoki raised an eyebrow at her suggestion.

“Don’t look at me like that, she’s not lesbian.”

A sour taste emerged in Ittoki’s mouth. Personally, he cared little for the sexualities of those closest to him, except for Tokiya. When it came to Haruka, he had no opinion whatsoever but it irked her when he soon realized the implications of Tomochika’s proposal. It would be much easier if this was simply an outing between friends but something told Ittoki that it was not what she had in mind. Sure, Haruka was not a lesbian but how was he supposed to tell her that he was gay?

“Don’t worry, she’s totally single and besides, I think you’re a better suitor for her than that sour lemon, Tokiya.”

“Tomochika, why are you doing this?”

“To cheer the _both_ of you up. You see, Haruka has been down lately and she really doesn’t want to tell me why.”

“Sure, fine, whatever.” Ittoki dismissively grabbed the tickets. He felt no joy over this whatsoever, mostly because he had no opinion towards Otori Academy whatsoever. He only knew it was an art school where those born with a silver spoon in their mouths attended. Occasionally the students there would hold special events to show off their superior skills in art, film, literature or music. Musicology on Saotome, on the other hand, was considered dumbed down version for those who had no money.

When Ittoki exited his thoughts, he saw Haruka stand in front of him, looking at him with a puzzled look on her face.

“Uhm, Tomo said, you had something to tell me.”

Instinctively, Ittoki fished the tickets up from his pocket and put them on the counter. He fumbled with his words as he struggled to give a graceful invitation. However, the way that Haruka’s eyes lit up, told him that it would not be necessary.

“So uhm, well, wanna go?”

“Yes!” she said with more enthusiasm than ever. This was the most excited she had appeared in all the time since they had known each other. In a way, it was endearing. Despite what Tomochika obviously hinted at, Ittoki swore to himself to keep this an outing between friends and nothing more.

* * *

Otori Academy was located in yet another district of the town, far, far away from where Ittoki lived. Thus, he had taken the bus, one of two school buses in town. Apparently, this bus also drove past grade schools as there were plenty of children present, making somewhat of a ruckus. Ittoki had seated himself near the exit so he could quickly escape. Soon, the bus stopped at the school and Ittoki quickly left.

The weather was somewhat chilly but not unbearable. Around him expensive cars and people dressed in fine clothing walked towards the entrance where a bouncer stood, checking for tickets.

He had planned to meet with Haruka near the academy but with the sea of fancy people, finding her would be harder than he thought. As he made way for the side, he suddenly saw a cloaked, familiar figure standing alone a few hundred feet from the entrance. A closer look determined it was indeed Haruka, although she looked ready to puke. Haruka was already a pale girl compared to others but right now, it was more eye-catching than before.

“Ah, I’m sorry. Did you wait for long?” Ittoki walked up to her after a simple wave of greeting. Haruka’s eyes lit up again before she quickly made way for the redhead. Her eyes sparkled as if she had just seen her knight in shining armor.

“Uh, uhm, no.” she looked down as the colors returned to her face.

“Are you all right? You look kinda under the weather.”

“I-I’m fine. It’s just… I’m excited, yeah, I am excited.” She looked up for once with a weak smile on her lips. Not wanting to press the issue further, Ittoki simply accepted the obvious lie and together they headed to the bouncer to show their tickets. The courtyard was packed with people, both students presumable and what Ittoki guessed was celebrities. He looked around until his eyes caught two large buildings towering over the crowd. Unlike the school building, they were cloaked in darkness and Ittoki assumed that they were dorms.

In the courtyard, there were a few benches where no horde of important pricks or eager students gathered, so Ittoki dragged Haruka to the nearest one before the poor girl passed out. As they walked, he heard her cough several times.

“You gotta tell me if you are feeling sick.” Ittoki made Haruka sit down on the bench before he plumped down next to her. Haruka looked briefly at him before lowering her gaze. “Uhm, the thing is that I… I have sociophobia.”

“Oh shoot. I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Ahaha, it’s OK. Over the few months, I have learned to combat it with my job at the café and Tomo dragging me around to all her parties. If my grandmother didn’t suggest that I started at the university, I don’t think I’d ever leave my room. “she meekly smiled, following it up with a nervous giggle.

“Your grandmother?”

Haruka sighed deeply as she grabbed her phone, searching for the pictures.

“Yes, I live with her in the countryside.” She said after a short while, showing Ittoki a picture of an older woman, who looked eerily like Haruka herself except much older. There was no doubt that this woman was related to Haruka.

“That’s a long way to school and work.”

“True… that’s why I sometimes live with my parents in the city.” Haruka smiled before coughing again, this time more apparent. She gasped and wheezed for air before grabbing her purse and quickly opening it. Fishing through her purse, Haruka pulled out a puffer and quickly put it to her mouth. A low wheezing emerged from the device before she put it back in her purse again. She took a few deep breaths before turning to the redhead.

“I’m sorry… my asthma goes all over the place when I’m nervous and when I’m in the city.”

That explained the coughing.

Looking at the tickets, there was still an hour until the concert began but considering the army of people present, Ittoki thought, it was the wisest idea to head over to the scene, meanwhile, he could get Haruka some water on the way.

“Let’s make sure to get some good spots, okay?”’ Ittoki said with all the positivity, he could muster. Haruka nodded eagerly in response and they headed deeper into the venue. Soon, they neared the scene and found a spot in the middle. Not many people had gathered and the few that had were seated in private sections. Ittoki concluded, they were for the VIPs. Suddenly, Haruka coughed again, wheezing for air as if she was choking to death.

“I’ll get you that water. So, don’t die on me, please?”

* * *

Opening the door to the restroom, he saw a water cooler with a few plastic glasses attached to it. The room itself was stylized and sterile for a restroom, with a few dozen small photos hanging on the wall. The pictures featured several greyscale images of famous musicians, photographers, and writers. Although Ittoki found the photos enchanting, he quickly reminded himself that he had someone waiting for him so he hurried to the water cooler and turned on the faucet.

Only to discover that the machine was broken.

Disgruntled, Ittoki noticed a scrap of paper sticking out from behind the machine, mentioning lack of functionality. The redhead shook his head and headed into the men’s bathroom. If he couldn’t use the water cooler, there was always the sinks of the toilets. Likewise, with the hallway, the restroom was immaculate and neatly designed with an emphasis on different types of art. There were passages from famous poets on the walls and references to fairy tales drawn in a simplistic but elegant style.

Suddenly a deep snort startled the redhead and he turned around only to lay eyes on one of the bathroom stalls. His heart skipped a beat for a second before shaking it off. It didn’t sound like the type of snort associated with a cold but Ittoki thought it was for the best if he didn’t question it. Quietly, he filled the cup with water when suddenly, the stall opened and a young man stepped out. He was a handsome fellow, around ten centimeters taller than Ittoki with dark brown hair and deep purple eyes hidden behind a pair of glasses. In a way, he reminded Ittoki a lot of Natsuki but only more… suave. However, a sinking feeling emerged in Ittoki’s stomach when he saw a streak of red blood slowly running from his nose. The brunette greeted Ittoki with a nod and a sly smirk before heading to the neighboring sink, whilst Ittoki kept his gaze, wide-eyed.

“What? You want an autograph?” the brunette asked after a while, his smile brightening a little.

“Uhm… your nose.” The redhead said a little off-handed, fearing the world would fall apart if he spoke in every other way. Suddenly the brunette’s eyes grew wide and he quickly grabbed some tissues to wipe his nose before washing his face. He leaned over the sink while staring intensely at his own reflection, only to sigh deeply and pull back.

“Thanks for pointing that out.” He said and quickly hurried out of the bathroom.

And only then did it suddenly occur to Ittoki that he was one of the members of HEAVEN.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What was Eiichi doing anyway?


End file.
